I have followed this entire thread, and I really don't see a trend of people saying you shouldn't bring your son into the ladies' locker room if your if pool's rules say 5 years old and under can be there. Some people seem to think that 5 is too old, but the majority seem to be of the opinion that you follow your pool's rules.

The only issue I see is people who are members of pools with a rule setting 5 years old as the cut off who want to bring their sons into the ladies' locker room when the boy is older than 5.

I'm a single mom of a 5 yo boy and a 2 yo girl. I will take both with me to the women's locker room and don't give a s*** if that upsets some grown ass adult women.

My big thing is that at our pool (PG Pool in MD), the women's showers are DIRECTLY in front of the bathrooms. So if you're dressed for going home but need to pee, your clothes will get wet. And if you're a kid coming out of the bathrooms with a parent, you're basically eye level with somebody's crotch. That's not really fun for anyone. To me, there's little reason not to renovate there, fix the stall issue, etc.

And we do have a handful of hyper dramatic tween girls who scream when they see little boys in the locker room. And i mean little boys. It's soooo annoying (and I have a girl)

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Using the word prude makes someone a potty mouth? You've just proven her point, Ms Prudy.

You are also redefining the discussion. OP referenced a five year old, within the rules at her pool. You fabricated pools that have rules for three year olds and then insisted that a three year olds need to be supervised did not trump your screwed up daughter's "need" to be comfortable.

Btw, my daughter is not comfortable in communal changing rooms. She is particularly uncomfortable around middle age women. Perhaps I should demand that you change elsewhere? After all, it's all about the ten year old's comfort isn't it? I thought that a reasonable parent would tell her to suck it up, but I guess I need to demand special treatment like you instead.

It was pointed out that you are nuts. You have no right to dictate what mothers do with their young children especially when it involves them being unsupervised. If you have a problem with the rules then you need to go elsewhere. End of story.

Love this - I remember being being 9 or 10 and being slightly uncomfortable with the middle age women standing around naked - they seemed to take forever. Not sure why but it eeked me and my friends out. I think it may have been seeing the effects of gravity. But it was really no big deal and we just changed quickly in the bathroom or shower stalls.

I don't remember ever being bothered by young boys in the locker room and I know they were there particularly when I lived in Sweden. I'm pretty sure boys there used the lockers and saunas with their mothers or sitters until they were 10 or 11.

Yes, this! This exactly. A lot of the middle aged women (I'm one myself now) would make me SO uncomfortable. I'm so glad nobody let me tell them to go. I'm not super comfortable changing in the locker room at this point anyway. I don't understand this whole gender big deal anyway. Should gay women and men be forced to change in the opposite locker room? no? Why not? It just doesn't make sense. If someone prizes modesty, and I completely understand how they could, then we should have plenty of enclosed changing stalls. If your pool is too cheap to have them, take it up with management, rather than taking it out on some poor mom of a young boy just trying to do what's best for her child. There's NO reason for open changing rooms, really, I mean, most people prefer not to look at other people's genitals and prefer not to have their own genitals looked at. It's human nature to be private - and I personally feel that way regarding either sex. Now, that doesn't mean I think people should be FORCED to change in the enclosed spaces, I just think that it's many people's preferences.

Anonymous wrote:Using the word prude makes someone a potty mouth? You've just proven her point, Ms Prudy.

You are also redefining the discussion. OP referenced a five year old, within the rules at her pool. You fabricated pools that have rules for three year olds and then insisted that a three year olds need to be supervised did not trump your screwed up daughter's "need" to be comfortable.

Btw, my daughter is not comfortable in communal changing rooms. She is particularly uncomfortable around middle age women. Perhaps I should demand that you change elsewhere? After all, it's all about the ten year old's comfort isn't it? I thought that a reasonable parent would tell her to suck it up, but I guess I need to demand special treatment like you instead.

It was pointed out that you are nuts. You have no right to dictate what mothers do with their young children especially when it involves them being unsupervised. If you have a problem with the rules then you need to go elsewhere. End of story.

Love this - I remember being being 9 or 10 and being slightly uncomfortable with the middle age women standing around naked - they seemed to take forever. Not sure why but it eeked me and my friends out. I think it may have been seeing the effects of gravity. But it was really no big deal and we just changed quickly in the bathroom or shower stalls.

I don't remember ever being bothered by young boys in the locker room and I know they were there particularly when I lived in Sweden. I'm pretty sure boys there used the lockers and saunas with their mothers or sitters until they were 10 or 11.

How embarrassing that this thread is still going. Seriously... I think OP was a troll (congrats!). Snowday is over. Don't we have anything better to do?

The last reply to one of my posts (simply saying that my 5 year old, who is in bounds for the rules of OUR pool) will continue to be changed in the ladies locker room) is that someone is going to intimidate my kids intentionally so that they won't want to use the pool anymore. I mean, really. So to these prudes, a five year old in an opposite gender lockerroom is "wrong," but scaring and intimidating children by an adult woman is not just "okay" but something she plans to do.

Consider the source of criticism, here, parents. This is a tempest in a teapot. There are a few weird pearl clutchers. Let them complain all they want here! They won't say it to your face. At best, you'll get some weird complaint on the listserv if it's a member pool, or you'll hear from management (and in that case you'll need to resolve the issue somehow).

Our pool bans changing poolside, but also bans kids 6+. My 5 year old still comes with me into the ladies room. He'll turn 6 this summer, and I'm not sure what we'll do. No family room. In our case, the restroom is also inside the locker rooms. One of the biggest issues I have is that there are a group of unsupervised teenagers who have had lots of close calls with little kids at our pool (they don't intentionally hurt them, but they run them over) several times, and that issue is not something that's easy to address - a pool is for everyone and the kids get all fired up and run around, and they're told to stop, and they do, but they're children, and it does happen sometimes. Or it's handled, but percolates up again. If these teens weren't a problem, I would be less concerned about my kid. The funny thing is, the parents of these teens are the same ones who complain about their delicate girls not being able to be in the locker room. We had an issue with some of the girls pointing and screaming at a 3 year old child, saying "he's looking at your boobies, Larla!" to another girl. I"d argue that the boy, rather than the girl, was probably the one being harmed there with that nonsense. Some of you moms of tween and teen girls need to be aware that your children are drama queens. I say that with no judgment because I was a tween / teen myself once. And some of you are parents of older boys, maybe you started letting them go to the restroom at 4 or 5 by themselves, and maybe that's why they do not know how to behave themselves when they are there. The irony is these people sometimes think the rest of us "helicopter" too much. It's often the troublemakers that have the biggest issue with everyone else.

Anyway, OP, just do what you need to do. Follow the rules, and if they no longer work for you, try to change them or find another pool. And pay no mind to the biddies or their high strung daughter. The hormones should level out for at least the daughters sometime soon!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Using the word prude makes someone a potty mouth? You've just proven her point, Ms Prudy.

You are also redefining the discussion. OP referenced a five year old, within the rules at her pool. You fabricated pools that have rules for three year olds and then insisted that a three year olds need to be supervised did not trump your screwed up daughter's "need" to be comfortable.

Btw, my daughter is not comfortable in communal changing rooms. She is particularly uncomfortable around middle age women. Perhaps I should demand that you change elsewhere? After all, it's all about the ten year old's comfort isn't it? I thought that a reasonable parent would tell her to suck it up, but I guess I need to demand special treatment like you instead.

It was pointed out that you are nuts. You have no right to dictate what mothers do with their young children especially when it involves them being unsupervised. If you have a problem with the rules then you need to go elsewhere. End of story.

Your post is completely off base as to me:

I'm talking to the lady who told someone to f-themselves at least 2x.

I am not the poster about the 3 year old limit.

I do have a right to dictate what moms do with their kids if they aren't following the rules posted and to be applied to all. I'll bring it up to that mom and management every time I see it. I'll also address her directly.

It is not just about the girl's comfort. It is about the rules and why they are there and how they are for everyone.

If you addressed me I would tell you to mind your own business. If you got management, I would tell them they need to provide someone to assist that has had a criminal and other background check and child abuse check as well as cameras being in the room. If there are stalls, you go in the stalls. Problem solved. No one except young kids should be changing in the open but as a mom to a boy, his safety comes first. Obviously you do not have young kids or boys or you are one of those hands off parents whose kid is the one running wild and you ignore it till it bothers you.

What you are saying is you will harass someone because they are not doing it your way. I would call security or the police on you without thinking twice.

So, today, you expect us to just take our child out soaking wet into a freezing car and drive home to change him? Really, if you do, you lack pure common sense.

Girls will not care in less you care. You are not talking about a 15 year old. You are talking about 3-4-5-6-7 year old boys who need supervision.

The irony is if you had a child in the dressing room alone, you'd probably be complaining about where are the child's parents and why aren't they supervising them.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Using the word prude makes someone a potty mouth? You've just proven her point, Ms Prudy.

You are also redefining the discussion. OP referenced a five year old, within the rules at her pool. You fabricated pools that have rules for three year olds and then insisted that a three year olds need to be supervised did not trump your screwed up daughter's "need" to be comfortable.

Btw, my daughter is not comfortable in communal changing rooms. She is particularly uncomfortable around middle age women. Perhaps I should demand that you change elsewhere? After all, it's all about the ten year old's comfort isn't it? I thought that a reasonable parent would tell her to suck it up, but I guess I need to demand special treatment like you instead.

It was pointed out that you are nuts. You have no right to dictate what mothers do with their young children especially when it involves them being unsupervised. If you have a problem with the rules then you need to go elsewhere. End of story.

Your post is completely off base as to me:

I'm talking to the lady who told someone to f-themselves at least 2x.

I am not the poster about the 3 year old limit.

I do have a right to dictate what moms do with their kids if they aren't following the rules posted and to be applied to all. I'll bring it up to that mom and management every time I see it. I'll also address her directly.

It is not just about the girl's comfort. It is about the rules and why they are there and how they are for everyone.

How about you read this again. And again if you still don't get it. We are talking and talking and talking about people who are following the rules. You seem to have an issue about people following the rules. Apparently the rules (under 6) shouldn't apply to 5 year olds. Well, guess what, they do. And you can complain as much as you want but it is you who will be removed from the facility not the mom with her son who is quietly minding her own business helping him get dressed.