Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here again

I was trying to just sit back and absorb and try not to interfere with things that are not my decision, and just told him I’d be here for whatever he needed when he needs me.

This all just started Wed night and today Tuesday he just texted me she’s delivering now at (kindly) approximately 33 weeks

Baby will need to stay in the NICU for at least a week

I have no more words, maybe they were both in such shock it caused her to go into preterm labor

His father has put him in contact with a lawyer. I don’t know what for yet. I just presume that he’s still in shock and doesn’t know how he feels about anything but it’s definitely about to get very real now.

I just hope that the actual presence of a live infant will help both of them decide where they are going to fall on all of this emotionally. I still don’t know how her mom & grandma feel about it or even if she’s told them.

He doesn’t want me to be there just now.

I imagine you never know until you’re actually there how it will all feel. I feel so helpless.

Hmmm, possible but unlikely that a 33 seeker would only spend a week in the NICU. Why did she deliver early?

I would honestly wonder whether she was more than 32 weeks, whether she’s known all along and whether your son is the father.

Anonymous wrote:OP here again

I was trying to just sit back and absorb and try not to interfere with things that are not my decision, and just told him I’d be here for whatever he needed when he needs me.

This all just started Wed night and today Tuesday he just texted me she’s delivering now at (kindly) approximately 33 weeks

Baby will need to stay in the NICU for at least a week

I have no more words, maybe they were both in such shock it caused her to go into preterm labor

His father has put him in contact with a lawyer. I don’t know what for yet. I just presume that he’s still in shock and doesn’t know how he feels about anything but it’s definitely about to get very real now.

I just hope that the actual presence of a live infant will help both of them decide where they are going to fall on all of this emotionally. I still don’t know how her mom & grandma feel about it or even if she’s told them.

He doesn’t want me to be there just now.

I imagine you never know until you’re actually there how it will all feel. I feel so helpless.

Anonymous wrote:OP here

If you recognize me from another post, here goes

We are the ones who give our kids an Amex allowance

This son gets 3K a month

I'm on board with giving the girlfriend an amex with a 1K allowance every month and turning down the 3K allowance to the 28 yo who doesn't want his life to be changed

Like I am so PI$$$edd off

What is this 700 800 per month bull****

I am REALLY ANGRY his dad just took his girlfriend on a wild ** vacation

My ex and my son can su** my ** that I'm buying diapers and baby supplies like I am SO MAD I AM TYPING LIKE THIS I AM THIS MAD

This is a baby no one's baby actually delivered deserves to be treated like something to get rid of

Anonymous wrote:OP here

If you recognize me from another post, here goes

We are the ones who give our kids an Amex allowance

This son gets 3K a month

I'm on board with giving the girlfriend an amex with a 1K allowance every month and turning down the 3K allowance to the 28 yo who doesn't want his life to be changed

Like I am so PI$$$edd off

What is this 700 800 per month bull****

I am REALLY ANGRY his dad just took his girlfriend on a wild ** vacation

My ex and my son can su** my ** that I'm buying diapers and baby supplies like I am SO MAD I AM TYPING LIKE THIS I AM THIS MAD

This is a baby no one's baby actually delivered deserves to be treated like something to get rid of

Anonymous wrote:Weighing in here - don't panic. He's smart to see an attorney to protect his rights. My DH became a dad at age 23 (nearly 40 years ago!), and he and his girlfriend at the time had stopped dating by the time the little girl was born.

When my SD was 3, her mom wanted to leave the DC area to move to the west coast. My DH engaged an attorney, and luckily even in the non-dad-friendly late eighties, he was awarded joint physical and legal custody. SD's mom was unable to leave the area unless she wanted to give up full custody. SD's school district was determined to be with my DH.

Obviously that was a long while ago, but it was genuinely helpful and important to establish custody, and it set the stage for a cooperative relationship that lasted until my SD's age of majority.

Don't catastrophize about losing your son. But do be aware that your contact with your future grandchild will and should be established through the time you spend with him. He will likely be granted 50/50 custody, so you'll have no need to interact with the mom of ppl the child if that circumstance is suddenly offensive to your son.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You told your son you would support him always.
But even in that post you sound like were getting into being a grandmother.
Then you say you were grandmothering up.
Now circling wagons. Team baby.

You lied to your son.
I am glad he has a lawyer.

The only thing a lawyer can advise is how much child support he will have to pay, with or without joint custody. The man-child needs to decide whether or not he wants to be a part of his son's life and seek joint custody. OP is supporting her son. It might not be the way her son wants, but that does not mean she is not supporting him.

Anonymous wrote:You told your son you would support him always.
But even in that post you sound like were getting into being a grandmother.
Then you say you were grandmothering up.
Now circling wagons. Team baby.

You lied to your son.
I am glad he has a lawyer.

Anonymous wrote:OP you are making choices I really would not make. I feel very sorry for your son.
I hope he recovers his life.

The woman has decided to keep the child and not place the boy up for adoption. Her choice. Grandma has decided to be a grandma to her grandson. What different would you make as the grandmother. OP's son needs to man the ef' up and stop acting like a boy. He is 27, not 17.