For my kid, I preview what's available a couple stores to make sure it's acceptable to me and then tell my 10 year old she can pick out what she wants from one of those stores. I feel fine saying "I don't think that's appropriate for someone your age" to a super skimpy suit, but I do think there is plenty of room to compromise and find some kind of two piece that you are both okay with.

Watching this thread. My 11yr old has started to develop and is pushing hard for a bikini. I straddle between wanting her to own and be proud of her own body, and my own sense that bikinis move towards unnecessary sexualization and attention to her developing body.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Unclench and buy a two piece on Boden. Everything is going to be ok.

My 6 yo wears two pieces from Boden. They are cute and it is easier to use the restroom than with a one piece.

https://www.bodenusa.com/en-us/nostalgic-smocked-bikini-multi-rainbow-gingham/sty-g2594-mul?cat=c1_s13_sh1865

This is what my daughter wears. Not a tankini. Her belly shows. But also not a string bikini.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You never thought of your daughter possibly being prematurely sexualized by wearing a bikini at a young age?
-OP

No, I didn’t.

+1. Actually covering non-existent breasts in a young child is what is sexualizing.

+2
If this is where your mind goes to, you are going to have lots of things to work out, op.

Come off it. All bathing suits cover non existent breasts. Having a child bathing suit cut like an adult string bikini is what's sexualizing. Same reason I wouldn't let my seven year old wear red nail polish or lipstick or high heels. It's sexualizing.

You have issues.

NP, but if you are oblivious to the sexualization of females, starting at very young pre-pubescent ages, then YOU have issues and need to pull your head out of the sand.

Imagine not letting your 7 yo wear red nail polish. People are really crazy.

What is the deal with this? I let my 6 yo wear whatever color she chooses. Right now she has a different color on each nail, including red.

Anonymous wrote:Unclench and buy a two piece on Boden. Everything is going to be ok.

My 6 yo wears two pieces from Boden. They are cute and it is easier to use the restroom than with a one piece.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You never thought of your daughter possibly being prematurely sexualized by wearing a bikini at a young age?
-OP

No, I didn’t.

+1. Actually covering non-existent breasts in a young child is what is sexualizing.

+2
If this is where your mind goes to, you are going to have lots of things to work out, op.

Come off it. All bathing suits cover non existent breasts. Having a child bathing suit cut like an adult string bikini is what's sexualizing. Same reason I wouldn't let my seven year old wear red nail polish or lipstick or high heels. It's sexualizing.

You have issues.

NP, but if you are oblivious to the sexualization of females, starting at very young pre-pubescent ages, then YOU have issues and need to pull your head out of the sand.

Imagine not letting your 7 yo wear red nail polish. People are really crazy.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You never thought of your daughter possibly being prematurely sexualized by wearing a bikini at a young age?
-OP

No, I didn’t.

+1. Actually covering non-existent breasts in a young child is what is sexualizing.

+2
If this is where your mind goes to, you are going to have lots of things to work out, op.

Come off it. All bathing suits cover non existent breasts. Having a child bathing suit cut like an adult string bikini is what's sexualizing. Same reason I wouldn't let my seven year old wear red nail polish or lipstick or high heels. It's sexualizing.

You have issues.

NP, but if you are oblivious to the sexualization of females, starting at very young pre-pubescent ages, then YOU have issues and need to pull your head out of the sand.

Anonymous wrote:I'm like you, OP, and also agree with the PPs that there is a difference between 2-piece bathing suits in general (e,g,, tankinis, rash guards with bottoms) and bikinis. I don't like seeing bikinis or bare midriffs on anyone under, say 15-16. Very young need the sun protection provided by other styles.

+1 I think OP is explicitly thinking 2-piece as in a bikini, and a lot of commenters are coming at her harshly. I don't think she worries about a TANKINI or a RASH GUARD as sexualizing her child, it's those itsy bitsy bikinis that are the problems! I 100% cringe when I see a toddler in a bikini. Topless young girls, 2 piece rashguard or tankini's that are functional, not a problem. But a freaking bikini on young girls is 100% needless sexualization,

Exactly why (as a previous commenter pointed out) i also wouldn't let my young daughter walk around in full make up and high heels, it's performative sexualization for the benefit of the male gaze.

My girls have always worn two pieces. It makes bathroom trips much easier, that's honestly the main reason. When they were smaller they wore bottoms and a rashguard on top to avoid sun damage. But there is a huge range of two pieces beyond "string bikini" FFS. Even in the "bikini" category there is a range. My 9 year old picked this out at Old Navy a few weeks ago:https://oldnavy.gap.com/browse/product.do?pid=692643032&cid=45211&pcid=45211&vid=1#pdp-page-content

If you can see a young girl in that swimsuit and even think about sex...get help.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You never thought of your daughter possibly being prematurely sexualized by wearing a bikini at a young age?
-OP

No, I didn’t.

+1. Actually covering non-existent breasts in a young child is what is sexualizing.

+2
If this is where your mind goes to, you are going to have lots of things to work out, op.

Come off it. All bathing suits cover non existent breasts. Having a child bathing suit cut like an adult string bikini is what's sexualizing. Same reason I wouldn't let my seven year old wear red nail polish or lipstick or high heels. It's sexualizing.

You have issues.

I wore a 2 piece as a child (preschool probably just the bottom, but elementary school both pieces. But a one piece for swimming lessons because it stayed on better.

Then around 11 or 12 (I don't remember) I stopped wanting to wear them and chose one pieces all the time. And that continued until I was in my 30s when I bought a 2 piece again.

If she is ok wearing one, then fine, but of course not the thong style, string bikini style, etc - there are very modest 2 pieces out there!

DD’s preschool required two pieces for girls because staff didn’t have time to help the kids dress at the pool. They just wore it under their clothes instead of underwear.

There are a lot of tweens at our pool wearing “bikinis” that look like sports bras with high cut bottoms (not cheeky and rise midway up to the belly button). They look sporty like Athleta or similar athleisure. That seems like a great compromise for that age. My early elementary daughter and pretty much all little girls wear either tankinis or rashguard + bottoms suits often. Same or more coverage than a one piece (no belly exposed), but easier in the bathroom. That doesn’t count count as a “two piece” to me really.

You are headed into a rough few years, OP. I second the Boden opinion and you might look at Primary and Hanna Andersson too. I wouldn’t die on this hill and it might be an opportunity to work on some give and take.

I have no issue with my 5 year old wearing a 2 piece. She’s tall and a lot of 1 pieces give her a wedge-y or the straps dig into her shoulders. That all being said, the tops she wears do have more coverage than a triangle bikini top.