Anonymous wrote:Depends on the moment.

My older one is smart and old enough to do fun stuff with. We have more common interests. But she's also moody and whiny and can be a real pain in the ass when she's in a bad mood. She can also be really mean to her brother.

My younger one probably has ADHD (eval coming later this summer) and is a real handful. He can be exhausting. But he's also snuggly, and adorable, and so affectionate. When we're having a good day he is an absolute joy.

These are my kids exactly too.

I have a boy and a girl. And they are both so different. I think I truly do love them an equal amount, but just so differently.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have no favorite. I love both of my daughters equally.

::coughbullcrrapcough::

Dp. Not crap. I have 2. I love them both equally. I do not have a favorite. It is possible.

My older kid is so much easier but my younger is so much happier and independent. I honestly can’t pick.

My kids will tell you my youngest step (now adopted) daughter is my favorite. My husband had three daughters from his first marriage and then we went on to have a son and daughter together. I don’t think I’ve ever had a favorite but my youngest adopted daughter has always needed me more.

I don’t love them all the same, but I love them all equally.

My oldest is the oldest and my first born. He is also a lot like DH, and I love watching him grow up and turn into a young man. He is quiet and serious and has so much intensity. I love getting into his mind and finding out what he is thinking.
My second child is a lot like me. We like a lot of the same books and movies. We worry about the same things. I feel like I have a special bond with him because I usually know what he is thinking.
My third child is my only girl. She loves art and music and sees the beauty in everything. Everyone loves her. At her first communion, she stood up in front of the entire congregation and described love as a feeling like warm soup is filling all of the parts inside you that you didn’t know were cold and empty.
And my youngest is my baby and my extrovert with the big personality. He is the kind of kid that had teenage and adult friends that I had never met before when he was four or five years old. People just walk up to him on the playground or in the hallway, call out his name, and give him a five or a handshake.

Depends on the moment.

My older one is smart and old enough to do fun stuff with. We have more common interests. But she's also moody and whiny and can be a real pain in the ass when she's in a bad mood. She can also be really mean to her brother.

My younger one probably has ADHD (eval coming later this summer) and is a real handful. He can be exhausting. But he's also snuggly, and adorable, and so affectionate. When we're having a good day he is an absolute joy.

For me, it depends on what we are doing. I’ve got one kid who is anxious and a picky eater and hates new situations. But he is a total rule follower and very affectionate. Love being home with him because he’s such a sweetie, does all his chores without a problem, but he can be a hassle when we are out and about. My other kid loves to try new adventures and is loud and boisterous. Love going out with him to restaurants and try new things, but he can be a pain at home when it’s time to quiet down.

Anonymous wrote:I love my oldest & SN one the most because I feel bad for him and I spend the most time with him since he was the first born. My goal is taking him to all possible weekly therapies, and I hope that to live independently and go to college if possible.

My youngest one is a strong little NT girl, and she is cute. I love her as well, but her older brother takes up more of my time and attention. Once she gets older, I will do more things only mommy and daughter thing together.

Pp here, my oldest & SN child (6 year old) has ASD, ADHD, anxiety, eating and speech disorder. He is a sweet boy even though he is also the most challenging ones. All therapists are impressed with his progress, and I recalled it was so tough that I only slept like a few hours (working at midnight to make up work) , taking him to therapies almost daily, working full time job, cosleeping with him and was pregnant for many months. My water broke with 2nd kid when I was working on Sunday at office. I love him the most, and he is more independent now.

I also remind myself that I have to spend some solo time with my little girl which is only 2 year old.

I don't have a favorite. I love them both equally.

I love my oldest & SN one the most because I feel bad for him and I spend the most time with him since he was the first born. My goal is taking him to all possible weekly therapies, and I hope that to live independently and go to college if possible.

My youngest one is a strong little NT girl, and she is cute. I love her as well, but her older brother takes up more of my time and attention. Once she gets older, I will do more things only mommy and daughter thing together.

The eldest.

I think that's an interesting philosophical question. How does someone force themselves to "love a child unconditionally", as pp claims every parent should do?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Middle child. Oldest child has ASD and brings no joy to our lives. I love the youngest but she has a difficult temperament.

Do you also love your oldest?

No. Used to, but now only feel duty. There is no reciprocity and my child is violent.

This is horrible. I bet your child can feel that. It's your job as a parent to love your children unconditionally.

If you've never parented a child with those issues, you need to pipe down.

After seeing the movie “Sophie’s Choice” I erased the idea of having a favorite from my mind. What makes it easy is that they are all wonderful kids!