Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. BIL1 stood up to SIL and is coming to our house Monday. He’s taking the subway out and DH will drive him back. Our family is too cheap to use Uber or rent cars.

I generally try to keep my kids away from SIL since she spread nasty rumors about them. I do usually keep snacks for the kids, but didn’t have them last week when we were there.

Sure OP. Troll better next time.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Bring food for the kids! That way, if dinner is late, you can feed them, and of course you're free to bring them home and put them to bed on your schedule. Done.

This. Easy and obvious solution.

OP is a troublemaker putting this on her SIL when she really ought to be providing food for her own kids. Why would SIL not feed the kids? It's not her responsibility.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t u dear stand how the parent of two young kids isn’t packing snacks. It’s a joke between DH and I how many snacks I pack even to go to the store, but my kid has never had a meltdown over being hungry, even travelling overseas. She doesn’t always need a snack, but... oh wait. She’s 4. Yes, she always needs a snack. Snacks are the special glue that holds them together to interesting things.

5 in insanely early for adults to have dinner. I could easily see where if things were busy during the day, and people got chatting, how 5 is a tough time to get dinner together. I’m actually assuming the grownups had already decided to nix 5pm dinner but didn’t tell you,

If BIL wanted to visit you, he would. He’s not staying with you, and he’s also not coming to visit you on his own. I’m assuming he has his car, or knows how to use Uber? He’s not a prisoner. Maybe you’re a little too kid centric or something right now and he’s not feeling it.

BIL1, BIL2 and SIL do not have cars. They’re millionaires, but hate driving. We pick up BIL1 when he comes out here. He likes the kids, but can’t stand SIL. He stays with them because they have empty bedrooms and live right by the subway.

I call TROLL. You've received a lot of good suggestions and you've come up with excuses for every single one. In any event, the "millionaire" BIL 1 can surely get an Uber if he wants to get from SIL's house to your house. Although I agree with another poster that it would be rude for you to invite him only.

Anonymous wrote:OP here. BIL1 stood up to SIL and is coming to our house Monday. He’s taking the subway out and DH will drive him back. Our family is too cheap to use Uber or rent cars.

I generally try to keep my kids away from SIL since she spread nasty rumors about them. I do usually keep snacks for the kids, but didn’t have them last week when we were there.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t u dear stand how the parent of two young kids isn’t packing snacks. It’s a joke between DH and I how many snacks I pack even to go to the store, but my kid has never had a meltdown over being hungry, even travelling overseas. She doesn’t always need a snack, but... oh wait. She’s 4. Yes, she always needs a snack. Snacks are the special glue that holds them together to interesting things.

5 in insanely early for adults to have dinner. I could easily see where if things were busy during the day, and people got chatting, how 5 is a tough time to get dinner together. I’m actually assuming the grownups had already decided to nix 5pm dinner but didn’t tell you,

If BIL wanted to visit you, he would. He’s not staying with you, and he’s also not coming to visit you on his own. I’m assuming he has his car, or knows how to use Uber? He’s not a prisoner. Maybe you’re a little too kid centric or something right now and he’s not feeling it.

BIL1, BIL2 and SIL do not have cars. They’re millionaires, but hate driving. We pick up BIL1 when he comes out here. He likes the kids, but can’t stand SIL. He stays with them because they have empty bedrooms and live right by the subway.

If BIL1 is a millionaire he can manage getting a car to visit you on his own time. Step back and let your DH handle this.

Yep. BIL1 is a grown-up. If he disliked SIL he could stay in a hotel or rent a car or take a taxi. He could easily say "Gosh, SIL and BIL2, I would love to see kiddie's rooms and brother's new TV (or whatever)." He doesn't want to come to your house or he would make it happen.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Bring food for the kids! That way, if dinner is late, you can feed them, and of course you're free to bring them home and put them to bed on your schedule. Done.

This. Easy and obvious solution.

OP is a troublemaker putting this on her SIL when she really ought to be providing food for her own kids. Why would SIL not feed the kids? It's not her responsibility.

????!!!!!! When someone invites your family to their home for dinner, it is customary to feed all the guests no matter their age. Parents shouldn’t need to bring food with them except the older infant / toddler months when the kid is eating purees and baby food.

Anonymous wrote:BIL1 actually has an obligation to say, "I have plans". And stick to the original plan. There has to be that push-back.

Anonymous wrote:This is for your husband and his brother to work out. Your husband can have a frank conversation with BIL and say, we want to see you without the others. BIL is staying in their house. He might be uncomfortable telling them that he wants to only do something with your family.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t u dear stand how the parent of two young kids isn’t packing snacks. It’s a joke between DH and I how many snacks I pack even to go to the store, but my kid has never had a meltdown over being hungry, even travelling overseas. She doesn’t always need a snack, but... oh wait. She’s 4. Yes, she always needs a snack. Snacks are the special glue that holds them together to interesting things.

5 in insanely early for adults to have dinner. I could easily see where if things were busy during the day, and people got chatting, how 5 is a tough time to get dinner together. I’m actually assuming the grownups had already decided to nix 5pm dinner but didn’t tell you,

If BIL wanted to visit you, he would. He’s not staying with you, and he’s also not coming to visit you on his own. I’m assuming he has his car, or knows how to use Uber? He’s not a prisoner. Maybe you’re a little too kid centric or something right now and he’s not feeling it.

BIL1, BIL2 and SIL do not have cars. They’re millionaires, but hate driving. We pick up BIL1 when he comes out here. He likes the kids, but can’t stand SIL. He stays with them because they have empty bedrooms and live right by the subway.

If BIL1 is a millionaire he can manage getting a car to visit you on his own time. Step back and let your DH handle this.

Anonymous wrote:Bring food for the kids! That way, if dinner is late, you can feed them, and of course you're free to bring them home and put them to bed on your schedule. Done.