Anonymous wrote:I had an experience with a man who tested my boundaries, and he told me that he had had an affair with a woman who worked with his wife in the same relatively small workplace, where his wife was a senior person. I recall thinking that was passive-aggressive behavior and very irresponsible as it could have adversely affected those two women's careers. He seemed like a nice enough guy, other than the hitting on women while married, but that story in particular bothered me.

was he from New Zealand?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m so tempted to out a m*thaf****ker but it is the sabbath.

Check back tomorrow.

And you will be outed right back

Be careful what you start...

LOL!! I’ll out myself as part of the revelation, IDGAF! If there is such a thing as outing here! And no I’m not an AP. This man was just a lying cheat. I suspect he was seeing someone else / sleeping with multiple people toward the end but who knows?

I don’t like being threatened. Especially after I’ve been wronged.

Anonymous wrote:^ zero personal accountability. She was “led” “groomed” to let her co-worker stick his d@ck in her on work trips. Poor thing. “Honey, it wasn’t my fault. He came on to me.”

God, these married women that can marry a sucker that believes this BS, more power to them. They will never change because it was “100% the dude’s fault.” Who buys this crap? Does your couples counselor?

Neighbor was on Ashley Madison and still blamed the AP and her husband . She created an account to find a lover, set up trysts in her own house: but she wasn’t to blame. She was lied to and led on.

Mental gymnastics, Gold Medalist.

^ zero personal accountability. She was “led” “groomed” to let her co-worker stick his d@ck in her on work trips. Poor thing. “Honey, it wasn’t my fault. He came on to me.”

God, these married women that can marry a sucker that believes this BS, more power to them. They will never change because it was “100% the dude’s fault.” Who buys this crap? Does your couples counselor?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is this a thread for all of the scorned APs who didn’t get the happy ending and got dumped? Now they want to out their ex-AP?

Or for APs hoping the wife recognizes a description and it causes his marriage to blow up do she can act innocent and welcome him with open arms?

The wives usually suspect and most don't care. Outing these men will not destroy their marriages as most wives have their good reasons for staying with a spouse they suspect or know cheats. For that matter,, most affair partners know they have been used and do not want a future with such a person. But outing these men may serve the purpose of bringing some social stigma to bear upon them and thus cause them to reconsider their bad behavior going forward. I am all for that social change.

Well a huge portion of these women are married too. So how exactly do they have no blame and won’t suffer the same social stigma. And society judges mothers/wives much harsher. The fallout from doing this will be greater for them —and the slut, whore, home wrecker labels to boot.

That is an evaluation that every woman has to undertake for herself, is it worth the fallout and risk to her own reputation to reveal the details of an extramarital affair. That fear is what has likely kept married figures like Harvey Weinstein or Bill Gates safely cocooned from their sexual peccadilloes.

Yes. Very self-centered evaluation, “her reputation” you say. Nothing about what that will do to her KIDS if she does a public outing. Scorn and revenge, scorched earth because AP dumped her

It is very narcissistic to view it as revenge or scorched earth against the man. It takes courage for a woman who has been groomed and led down a path she did not initiate or seek out, particularly in the professional context and when the man is in a relative position of power, to speak out abou what is in some cases a repeated pattern of behavior with the men who cheat. Admitting your failings, addressing the truth, and then working to repair yourself and your relationships with spouse and children is about as honest and open as one can be with one's family and ultimately an example of strength and courage for one's children. The children of men who are serial cheaters know the truth in most cases, and sense the pain and deceit inherent in their parents' relationship.

Endless need for stimulation and adoration

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is this a thread for all of the scorned APs who didn’t get the happy ending and got dumped? Now they want to out their ex-AP?

Or for APs hoping the wife recognizes a description and it causes his marriage to blow up do she can act innocent and welcome him with open arms?

The wives usually suspect and most don't care. Outing these men will not destroy their marriages as most wives have their good reasons for staying with a spouse they suspect or know cheats. For that matter,, most affair partners know they have been used and do not want a future with such a person. But outing these men may serve the purpose of bringing some social stigma to bear upon them and thus cause them to reconsider their bad behavior going forward. I am all for that social change.

Well a huge portion of these women are married too. So how exactly do they have no blame and won’t suffer the same social stigma. And society judges mothers/wives much harsher. The fallout from doing this will be greater for them —and the slut, whore, home wrecker labels to boot.

That is an evaluation that every woman has to undertake for herself, is it worth the fallout and risk to her own reputation to reveal the details of an extramarital affair. That fear is what has likely kept married figures like Harvey Weinstein or Bill Gates safely cocooned from their sexual peccadilloes.

Yes. Very self-centered evaluation, “her reputation” you say. Nothing about what that will do to her KIDS if she does a public outing. Scorn and revenge, scorched earth because AP dumped her

Anonymous wrote:^Yeah. Didn’t work so well for Rachel Uchitel. Or Rielle Hunter

Rielle Hunter undoubtedly came out worse for wear, but she positively buried the career of Senator John Edwards. I suppose he is a social cautionary tale in that this type of behavior may one day catch up with you and damage your reputation. But there are likewise several recent examples of women who have managed to remain relatively anonymous and protected while bravely coming forward in the corporate context to have corporations and their corporate executive address bad actors.

^ these women “fall on the sword” in more than one way. Pun intended

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is this a thread for all of the scorned APs who didn’t get the happy ending and got dumped? Now they want to out their ex-AP?

Or for APs hoping the wife recognizes a description and it causes his marriage to blow up do she can act innocent and welcome him with open arms?

The wives usually suspect and most don't care. Outing these men will not destroy their marriages as most wives have their good reasons for staying with a spouse they suspect or know cheats. For that matter,, most affair partners know they have been used and do not want a future with such a person. But outing these men may serve the purpose of bringing some social stigma to bear upon them and thus cause them to reconsider their bad behavior going forward. I am all for that social change.

Well a huge portion of these women are married too. So how exactly do they have no blame and won’t suffer the same social stigma. And society judges mothers/wives much harsher. The fallout from doing this will be greater for them —and the slut, whore, home wrecker labels to boot.

That is an evaluation that every woman has to undertake for herself, is it worth the fallout and risk to her own reputation to reveal the details of an extramarital affair. That fear is what has likely kept married figures like Harvey Weinstein or Bill Gates safely cocooned from their sexual peccadilloes.

It’s the premise of nasty affair website Ashley Madison. Both married affair partners have something to lose if it’s found out. Unlike with a single affair partner. The disaster is that it causes two families to fall apart and two divorces, f@@cked up kids. But, nobody ever said cheaters were smart or selfless people. Idiots.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is this a thread for all of the scorned APs who didn’t get the happy ending and got dumped? Now they want to out their ex-AP?

Or for APs hoping the wife recognizes a description and it causes his marriage to blow up do she can act innocent and welcome him with open arms?

The wives usually suspect and most don't care. Outing these men will not destroy their marriages as most wives have their good reasons for staying with a spouse they suspect or know cheats. For that matter,, most affair partners know they have been used and do not want a future with such a person. But outing these men may serve the purpose of bringing some social stigma to bear upon them and thus cause them to reconsider their bad behavior going forward. I am all for that social change.

Well a huge portion of these women are married too. So how exactly do they have no blame and won’t suffer the same social stigma. And society judges mothers/wives much harsher. The fallout from doing this will be greater for them —and the slut, whore, home wrecker labels to boot.

That is an evaluation that every woman has to undertake for herself, is it worth the fallout and risk to her own reputation to reveal the details of an extramarital affair. That fear is what has likely kept married figures like Harvey Weinstein or Bill Gates safely cocooned from their sexual peccadilloes.

^Yeah. Didn’t work so well for Rachel Uchitel. Or Rielle Hunter

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is this a thread for all of the scorned APs who didn’t get the happy ending and got dumped? Now they want to out their ex-AP?

Or for APs hoping the wife recognizes a description and it causes his marriage to blow up do she can act innocent and welcome him with open arms?

The wives usually suspect and most don't care. Outing these men will not destroy their marriages as most wives have their good reasons for staying with a spouse they suspect or know cheats. For that matter,, most affair partners know they have been used and do not want a future with such a person. But outing these men may serve the purpose of bringing some social stigma to bear upon them and thus cause them to reconsider their bad behavior going forward. I am all for that social change.

Well a huge portion of these women are married too. So how exactly do they have no blame and won’t suffer the same social stigma. And society judges mothers/wives much harsher. The fallout from doing this will be greater for them —and the slut, whore, home wrecker labels to boot.

The Bill Gates scenario. I think of him very differently now than I did a month ago, and no doubt some of the awe and respect accorded to him as an admired public figure who has done much good, has been deeply tarnished by recent public revelations.

Anonymous wrote:Is this a thread for all of the scorned APs who didn’t get the happy ending and got dumped? Now they want to out their ex-AP?

Or for APs hoping the wife recognizes a description and it causes his marriage to blow up do she can act innocent and welcome him with open arms?

The wives usually suspect and most don't care. Outing these men will not destroy their marriages as most wives have their good reasons for staying with a spouse they suspect or know cheats. For that matter,, most affair partners know they have been used and do not want a future with such a person. But outing these men may serve the purpose of bringing some social stigma to bear upon them and thus cause them to reconsider their bad behavior going forward. I am all for that social change.