Anonymous
Post 05/25/2021 17:50     Subject: Re:What to expect at pediatrician visit for birth control?
Anonymous wrote:A girl who is mature enough to be having intercourse is mature enough for a pelvic exam.

OP I think 14 is too young. Can’t you keep her away from unsupervised contact with their boyfriend? Until 16[/quote

Oh please this is as old as time. No OP can not watch her every minute of every day.


OP is totally doing the right thing.



Anonymous
Post 05/25/2021 17:47     Subject: Re:What to expect at pediatrician visit for birth control?
OP - and other parents of teens - you might find today's 1A segment interesting. While this is more specifically focused on Plan B, there was a lot of the later segment that includes discussion with two doctors about teens and access to birth control.

https://the1a.org/segments/plan-b-pill-movie/
Anonymous
Post 05/25/2021 17:37     Subject: Re:What to expect at pediatrician visit for birth control?
Important PSA for parents of daughters. Please take some time to understand how cervical cancer screening guidelines have changed since we were teenagers. Yes when we were young we were rushed off for our first pap as soon as we became sexually active and were told we should have them every year after that. Things have changed. Dramatically. And they’ve changed for good reason. We were over screening and over intervening on women’s cervices. There has been a ton of research in the last 10 to 20 years and path guidelines have changed quite a bit based on how we know better. I encourage you to look at ASCCP.org and specifically at the screening guidelines section. Right now most practices are still adhering to first pap T 21 but as you’ll see it will be shifting to for cervical cancer screening using primary HPV testing at age 25 very soon. You really shouldn’t be going to doctors who do them every year, even if you ask or insist on it. Because the research-based guidelines don’t tell us what to do with those inevitable abnormal positives and then you’ve got a doctor just basically making stuff up.
Anonymous
Post 05/25/2021 14:01     Subject: What to expect at pediatrician visit for birth control?
You could try the pediatrician, although as mentioned upthread, some are very uncomfortable with prescribing birth control. I agree with the Planned Parenthood suggestions. I don’t know how I feel about the kid not getting a pelvic exam, though if she’s been vaccinated against HPV, the Pap may not be necessary. I do think I’d want an STD test for the most common STD’s for peace of mind if they’ve been having unprotected sex - don’t know that I’d trust some 14 year olds to use a condom correctly every time.
Anonymous
Post 05/25/2021 13:12     Subject: What to expect at pediatrician visit for birth control?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Too young!


How does this help the OP?


Her kid can't even drive. She doesn't need to have a boyfriend and be having sex with him. Mom can and should put an end to this pronto
Anonymous
Post 05/25/2021 10:50     Subject: Re:What to expect at pediatrician visit for birth control?
Not everyone can/should take bc pill. OP, please make sure she has a blood test first to rule out blood conditions that are incompatible with taking hormones.
Anonymous
Post 05/25/2021 10:39     Subject: What to expect at pediatrician visit for birth control?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
OP,

It's great she told you. She deserves to be commended for that.

I haven't read all the posts here, but as the mother of a teen with special needs, I disagree with the premise that a 14 year old deciding to have sexual relations is automatically mature enough to make that decision, and the consequences regarding birth control and gyn exams, and continued relations with her boyfriend. Perhaps she is! Perhaps she's a very mature and thoughtful 14 year old. I've known some kids like that. But only you can determine that. Some children, even without diagnosed special needs, are actually not mature enough at 14 to handle ALL of what sex entails. They did the deed, but can't imagine all the things that swirl around the deed, and may not be ready to handle long-term relations.

So OP, just because she had sex a few times, doesn't mean she should continue. It depends on the actual reasons why she did this (there could be many, not all sexually related), your relationship and the trust between you, what her personality is, how good she is at impulse control and delayed gratification, and saying no... so many things.

Bets of luck navigating this.



I kind of agree that 14 is very young for the emotional intensity that goes with a sexual relationship, but the genie is out of the bottle. I think the best thing to do is to be very supportive and make sure she’s staying on an even keel and maintaining a life outside of the relationship - friends, school, etc.


oh and I also agree with giving her the space to decide if she wants to continue the relationship or not.
Anonymous
Post 05/25/2021 10:39     Subject: What to expect at pediatrician visit for birth control?
Anonymous wrote:Too young!


How does this help the OP?
Anonymous
Post 05/25/2021 10:38     Subject: What to expect at pediatrician visit for birth control?
Anonymous wrote:
OP,

It's great she told you. She deserves to be commended for that.

I haven't read all the posts here, but as the mother of a teen with special needs, I disagree with the premise that a 14 year old deciding to have sexual relations is automatically mature enough to make that decision, and the consequences regarding birth control and gyn exams, and continued relations with her boyfriend. Perhaps she is! Perhaps she's a very mature and thoughtful 14 year old. I've known some kids like that. But only you can determine that. Some children, even without diagnosed special needs, are actually not mature enough at 14 to handle ALL of what sex entails. They did the deed, but can't imagine all the things that swirl around the deed, and may not be ready to handle long-term relations.

So OP, just because she had sex a few times, doesn't mean she should continue. It depends on the actual reasons why she did this (there could be many, not all sexually related), your relationship and the trust between you, what her personality is, how good she is at impulse control and delayed gratification, and saying no... so many things.

Bets of luck navigating this.



I kind of agree that 14 is very young for the emotional intensity that goes with a sexual relationship, but the genie is out of the bottle. I think the best thing to do is to be very supportive and make sure she’s staying on an even keel and maintaining a life outside of the relationship - friends, school, etc.
Anonymous
Post 05/25/2021 10:35     Subject: What to expect at pediatrician visit for birth control?
Too young!
Anonymous
Post 05/25/2021 10:20     Subject: What to expect at pediatrician visit for birth control?

OP,

It's great she told you. She deserves to be commended for that.

I haven't read all the posts here, but as the mother of a teen with special needs, I disagree with the premise that a 14 year old deciding to have sexual relations is automatically mature enough to make that decision, and the consequences regarding birth control and gyn exams, and continued relations with her boyfriend. Perhaps she is! Perhaps she's a very mature and thoughtful 14 year old. I've known some kids like that. But only you can determine that. Some children, even without diagnosed special needs, are actually not mature enough at 14 to handle ALL of what sex entails. They did the deed, but can't imagine all the things that swirl around the deed, and may not be ready to handle long-term relations.

So OP, just because she had sex a few times, doesn't mean she should continue. It depends on the actual reasons why she did this (there could be many, not all sexually related), your relationship and the trust between you, what her personality is, how good she is at impulse control and delayed gratification, and saying no... so many things.

Bets of luck navigating this.

Anonymous
Post 05/25/2021 10:08     Subject: What to expect at pediatrician visit for birth control?
You do not need a pelvic exam to get a prescription for Birth Control and kids that age don't need a Pap.

I would agree with some of the PPs who suggest Planned Parenthood. They are set up to talk to younger patients about sex and birth control in a way that a pediatricians office might not be. They also have condoms freely available which won't be handed out at your Peds office.
Another option would be to start going to a Family medicine practice. I would do that before going to an OB/GYN.

I would also agree with keeping Plan B in the house.
Anonymous
Post 05/25/2021 09:13     Subject: Re:What to expect at pediatrician visit for birth control?
I would take her to your GYN. This is what my Mom did. We discussed the appointment before hand but she did not go back with me. I don't know what tests are appropriate for her age but I'm sure my Dr. would know. I would be nervous about asking the pediatrician unless you feel confident they have more of an adolescent focus.
Anonymous
Post 05/25/2021 09:10     Subject: What to expect at pediatrician visit for birth control?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Lots of misinformation here. Teens don’t need Paps or pelvic exams to get birth control pills. OP should advocate for her daughter to get access to a range of options without that barrier.



https://www.choosingwisely.org/patient-resources/pelvic-exams-pap-tests-and-oral-contraceptives/


But sexually active women of any age should have paps and pelvic exams in order to establish a baseline for healthy pelvic health going forward. If she’s sexually actively she needs a pelvic exam and Pap smear.


What in the world is baseline pelvic health? I agree that regular exams are necessary, but it has nothing to do with establishing baselines. We’re not talking about mammograms here.


Testing for hpv from the start and learning how to prevent it (including getting the shot if she hasn’t) is important.


HPV testing is not even recommended for teens ... https://www.cancer.gov/news-events/cancer-currents-blog/2020/cervical-cancer-screening-hpv-test-guideline

Anonymous
Post 05/25/2021 09:08     Subject: What to expect at pediatrician visit for birth control?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Lots of misinformation here. Teens don’t need Paps or pelvic exams to get birth control pills. OP should advocate for her daughter to get access to a range of options without that barrier.



https://www.choosingwisely.org/patient-resources/pelvic-exams-pap-tests-and-oral-contraceptives/


But sexually active women of any age should have paps and pelvic exams in order to establish a baseline for healthy pelvic health going forward. If she’s sexually actively she needs a pelvic exam and Pap smear.


What in the world is baseline pelvic health? I agree that regular exams are necessary, but it has nothing to do with establishing baselines. We’re not talking about mammograms here.


Testing for hpv from the start and learning how to prevent it (including getting the shot if she hasn’t) is important.