Anonymous wrote:
There are a lot of things about the DMV that not only cost more, but are more stressful. Services in this area are weirdly limited in ways that you don't run into in other cities, partly because of how many people abandoned the city for the suburbs in the 80s and 90s. DC never really built up its service infrastructure when people started moving back in. We got lots more bars and restaurants, but not necessarily more daycares, dentists, and auto body shops.

I'm a cheerleader for DC and have no plans to leave, but OMG this so much. This is my biggest complaint about the city, more so that HCOL (dare we say VHCOL?) and traffic. It's so freaking hard to get basic services done. Medical and dental offices don't accept new patients. My dog groomer schedules appointments two months out. You can't just walk into a chain salon and get a haircut for $20. Reliable handymen are impossible to find unless you happen to know someone through your social circle. Any type of home repair? Get three estimates? Bwahahaha. Go with the first company that actually agrees to do the job and then also shows up. I'm sure part of this is that having such a high cost of living drives out the working class that would provide the home / auto / cosmetic services we want without a waiting list.

On the other end of the scale, we don't have much accessibility to a lot of the quirky/cool things other cities have. Much smaller cities have studios for circus arts. There's currently a thread on Reddit about the impossibility of signing up for a pottery class in DC. I remember in the before times I wanted to take cooking lessons, and the local options were both exorbitantly priced and sold out.

I love restaurants as much as the next person and partake in them freely. (I'm one of those weirdos whose spending actually increased during the pandemic because of frequent takeout and extra booze.) But I don't understand why a metro area with such a vibrant and diverse population has very little to offer in terms of vibrant and diverse amenities.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:1) Where are you going?
2) What is your HHI in the DMV (and what will it be where you are going)?

By HCOL I really mean real estate. That is truly the only think here that I think is ridiculous here. Food is honestly the same here as back home in a relatively lower COL area.

Childcare is relatively high here too, although lower cost options do exist. But I think childcare cost here are among the highest in the country.

I also think form a quality of life perspective, it's the cost of childcare plus its scarcity. When I speak to friends in other cities, even cities where childcare costs just as much as it does here or more (like NYC, San Francisco, LA, Seattle) they are always surprised by the hoops we have to jump through just to get a spot in a daycare. You see that other places but only with certain, very in demand centers that offer special services like bilingual education or that are attached to prestigious institutions. We sat on waitlists for months just to get a spot at a regular, decent daycare that was reasonably close to one of our offices. That's unusual.

There are a lot of things about the DMV that not only cost more, but are more stressful. Services in this area are weirdly limited in ways that you don't run into in other cities, partly because of how many people abandoned the city for the suburbs in the 80s and 90s. DC never really built up its service infrastructure when people started moving back in. We got lots more bars and restaurants, but not necessarily more daycares, dentists, and auto body shops.

I think “scarcity” sums it up. That’s exactly how I feel. That scarcity means that people are always competing for limited resources (housing, childcare waiting lists).

Moving to upstate NY. Keeping my remote job, spouse will have to look for something new. House price much lower than here but high property taxes,

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t exactly understand moving for lower cost of living.

I see moving to a lower tax state. But for me WFH, two kids in college and one in public school I literally only spend in fixed expenses. Tuition being largest.

My job is WFH but if it changed I be in trouble if moved.

....You *don't understand* moving for lower cost of living -like housing costs? Seriously? You do know that not all areas of the US housing costs as much either in terms of rent or homes for sale as the DMV? Or daycare costs are a fraction of our previous costs. Yes, that is a major factor that pushed us out. Also no state income tax helps too.

I don’t pay daycare, never have. I own my home mortgage free, like 40 percent of people in DMV area. Car insurance and property tax relatively low in this area. The income tax is an issue. This week got a biggie bag at Wendy’s for four bucks as wanted to get out of house one day. I drive maybe 1,500 miles a year.

What I spend maybe a car once every 12-15 years, tuition. Medical but that copays are same everywhere. I originally moved to this area as it was low cost. I would say vast majority of homeowners are mortgage free in my section. I am the new neighbor at 4 years. Most are 15-45. Homes are 45 years old.

Rent is cheap here too. DC is super cheap. I was used to Manhattan rents and NYC surburb property taxes. It is cheap here

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a person of color, I always get envious of this thread, I don't feel like I can just take my kids and move to a random non diverse city. It is privilege no having to think about how your kids or family will fit in. Enjoy

Very few cities (especially on the coasts) are non-diverse. Suburbs and rural areas? Yes.

PP here. That is exactly my point, the cities are probably going to have HCOL. Most people on this thread are not moving to big city. I am in IT and considered moving to Austin because I was told it is diverse but I visited and didn't see lot of people like me.

Anonymous wrote:People aren't going to tell you *exactly* where they are moving. Why? Because plenty of people on this forum are snobs and will try to rip any place listed to shred. I *love* my home (i.e. the LCOL I left the DMV for) and I don't want to see it criticized by the angry, bitter people who think the DMV, New York and San Francisco are the only place to live. I will NEVER mention it by name on this forum. And, yes, my home has
1. Great school district (highly rated by all objective measures).
2. LCOL
3. Better traffic.
4. Better weather.
5. I make significantly more here than I did in the DMV.
6. Laid back attitude

These places are out there. You just have to look. Some people will never "see" them because they only want to live in places considered desirable by their social circle.

It’s too bad that your LCOL/second rate city doesn’t have a DCUM equivalent. Otherwise, you would be able to whine on that forum.

Anonymous wrote:As a person of color, I always get envious of this thread, I don't feel like I can just take my kids and move to a random non diverse city. It is privilege no having to think about how your kids or family will fit in. Enjoy

Very few cities (especially on the coasts) are non-diverse. Suburbs and rural areas? Yes.

As a person of color, I always get envious of this thread, I don't feel like I can just take my kids and move to a random non diverse city. It is privilege no having to think about how your kids or family will fit in. Enjoy

Anonymous wrote:Chicago. Bought a SFH in 2017, 5bd 2ba with a 1/2 acre corner lot for $335k. Great school district and 30 min train to downtown.

Seriously?! What suburb is this? I am from Chicago and would love to move back, but we're still finding that a normal house (3/4 beds, 2.5-4 baths, 2000-2700 sf) without any glaring deficits (half a block from an interstate, on a main artery, etc.) in an inner or "midring" suburb, in a good school district, in a town with a train is at least $600k. Plus the taxes are crazy. I'd love to know where you live! (If for no other reason than my own curiosity.)

OP- Good point about childcare costs here. I remember a conversation with my sister once. I was talking about the hourly rate for caregivers. She thought I was talking about the daily rate!

We are moving to Colorado. It will prob be the same cost of living, but better overall lifestyle. Taking our jobs with us. Making around $350k

We moved elsewhere in Virginia, southern VA. It's so much better. In fact, I know this sounds boastful, but last night my husband and I had a conversation about what to do with all the money we suddenly have at the end of the month. We NEVER had that conversation in NOVA.

Anonymous wrote:People aren't going to tell you *exactly* where they are moving. Why? Because plenty of people on this forum are snobs and will try to rip any place listed to shred. I *love* my home (i.e. the LCOL I left the DMV for) and I don't want to see it criticized by the angry, bitter people who think the DMV, New York and San Francisco are the only place to live. I will NEVER mention it by name on this forum. And, yes, my home has
1. Great school district (highly rated by all objective measures).
2. LCOL
3. Better traffic.
4. Better weather.
5. I make significantly more here than I did in the DMV.
6. Laid back attitude

These places are out there. You just have to look. Some people will never "see" them because they only want to live in places considered desirable by their social circle.

**quietly agreeing**

The herd mentality is strong. The only places that aren’t trashed (and even then, they are by some) are the places that have already been deemed “acceptable,” like Austin, and those places have already been ruined by an influx of people from the coasts.

I won’t post where we moved because one of two things would happen (1) people on here would trash it and explain the myriad ways I really don’t love living here or (2) I would actually convince people that it’s awesome, and we would be overrun, even more so than we are already.

FWiW, our house wasn’t cheaper than our house in DC, it it is bigger, has a water view, and nicer in every way. Everything here is so much less stressful. Everything — from kids stuff (schools, car pool, summer camp, etc) to little things like going to the grocery store.

Anonymous wrote:We moved from the DC area to Austin. Kept the same salaries, and kept our DC-based jobs. Daycare is half the cost. We have a great 2400 sq foot house for 380k (bought before the current boom) with 1/3 acre and great schools within walking distance. No waitlist for daycare, no waitlist for aftercare, no waitlist for summer camp. I can avoid the traffic bc everything I need is nearby. Awesome hiking. There are disadvantages to living in TX for sure, but we don't regret moving for a second (other than leaving friends behind).

Where in ATX did you buy a house for $380K? And are the schools actually walkable? I find that my TX friends/family living within walking distance to school but don't actually walk because no sidewalks or walking culture.

Anonymous wrote:We're moving to Montana, but it's not cheaper because the land is crazy expensive. So it is cheaper, but you can't find much for where we are looking for under 1M. We are headed out there doe a better quality of life. The things to do there are more like line with out lifestyle than what's available in the DC metro area.

No change in income.

We were in Montana over spring break skiing. I'm insanely jealous of your move. Is one of thr most beau6places I've ever visited.

Crazy thing is it would be 19 degrees in the mountains and 55 and sunny in the Valley. The climate is incredible.