Read the empowered wife

Next time you see your DH acting like an ahole to your DC, turn on your video recorder. Make some recordings and show it to him later when he is calm. Ask him if he would like other people in his life to see the recording.

I started video taping my DC when he flew into rages over small things. After I played the recordings for him, he was very ashamed and embarassed, he didn't want anyone else to see the videos. He stopped raging immediately.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. We just moved into a bigger house that I really didn’t want to, because I felt like I was trapping myself. I am mostly happier because I have more space to myself, but it’s also an albatross. Tomorrow he’ll act like everything’s back to normal. He can never apologize or grow from his mistakes.

Same here. DH never apologizes and will not address his issues. I married Mr. Perfect. It's never him, it's me. I'm the source of all problems. If I dare complain about something or ask him to address something, he lashes out and gets snide because how dare I.

Same here! I married mr perfect too and every day that goes by I hate him more and more. He will turn everything around to my fault. I can NEVER complain about anything too because he gives me the same how dare I. The dog he brought home shit in the kitchen and when I brought it to his attention he said it was the cats fault. Because the cat opened the door to our bedroom during the night and let the dog out.

This is a prime example of how so many marriages are trash - the people in them are stupid. What does it matter if the dog HE brought home shit on the floor, or the cat (presumably "yours") facilitated it? Just imagining having such stupid thoughts is lowering my IQ as I read your post

Anonymous wrote:That so many of you decided to marry men you clearly have come to hate and have no regard for says much about you and your poor decisions in life. That some of you stay married to these men makes me question your level of intelligence. Do you have self-respect or dignity? It comes off as pathetic.
If I felt this way about dh I would definitely divorce.

You can never predict the future behavior of any human being! People change, personalities change, brains change. Don’t judge.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. We just moved into a bigger house that I really didn’t want to, because I felt like I was trapping myself. I am mostly happier because I have more space to myself, but it’s also an albatross. Tomorrow he’ll act like everything’s back to normal. He can never apologize or grow from his mistakes.

Same here. DH never apologizes and will not address his issues. I married Mr. Perfect. It's never him, it's me. I'm the source of all problems. If I dare complain about something or ask him to address something, he lashes out and gets snide because how dare I.

Same here! I married mr perfect too and every day that goes by I hate him more and more. He will turn everything around to my fault. I can NEVER complain about anything too because he gives me the same how dare I. The dog he brought home shit in the kitchen and when I brought it to his attention he said it was the cats fault. Because the cat opened the door to our bedroom during the night and let the dog out.

That so many of you decided to marry men you clearly have come to hate and have no regard for says much about you and your poor decisions in life. That some of you stay married to these men makes me question your level of intelligence. Do you have self-respect or dignity? It comes off as pathetic.
If I felt this way about dh I would definitely divorce.

Anonymous wrote:I hope the "sexless" guy/guys are reading this thread.

If the man is being a jerk in the relationship sex is the last thing a woman wants.

This. I once read a quote about a man not realizing that what he says is also heard by our vaginas.

I hope the "sexless" guy/guys are reading this thread.

If the man is being a jerk in the relationship sex is the last thing a woman wants.

OP, me too. And I feel stuck as well with the house.

Among other reasons to hate him, my DH is a dick to our son. Our straight-A, variety athlete is a disappointment to DH every day. Why? Because he won’t join the military. Because he isn’t interested in majoring in engineering. Because his interests aren’t the same of his father (constant yard work and car maintenance). Because his narcissist father can’t control every detail of his life.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Every day this forum reminds me why I stay away from men.
Ladies, I hope it gets better for each of you soon.

+1

Lesbian here. My wife and I have our issues but damn. Could not have made it with a dude even if I had wanted to.

Just as it’s ridiculous to generalize about all women, it’s ridiculous to generalize about all men.

- A woman who is happy in her marriage to a man

I'm not really generalizing.

https://www.them.us/story/gay-marriage-is-better

https://www.apa.org/monitor/2013/04/same-sex

https://www.advocate.com/people/2020/2/13/study-gay-people-have-happier-marriages-straight-people

Anecdotally speaking, we have tons of married friends - gay and straight. From those observations alone, I stand by what I said. Of course not every man is the same, and that's not what I said.

Not the first time straight ladies have gotten butt hurt over this observation on DCUM.

Straight woman here. I think you are right (and I say that as someone who likes her husband and doesn’t hate men). I think men are more difficult to deal with in relationships because they don’t communicate their own feelings and usually get very defensive when their spouse communicates hers. I think they don’t deal well with things that don’t have direct fixes. Men are also raised to be competitive, and I think they carry that over into relationships. So they see arguments in terms of winning and losing, as opposed to seeing them as a thesis-antithesis-synthesis process where people reach middle ground.

Women can sometimes be like that too, but I think in general it’s more an issue with men. Girls are raised to talk through things. Men are generally raised to win things. I’m painting in broad strokes, but I think it’s true. Some men are able to learn as adults how to communicate feelings and argue productively. But they have to have a lot of self-awareness and they have to want the marriage/relationship to work.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Every day this forum reminds me why I stay away from men.
Ladies, I hope it gets better for each of you soon.

+1

Lesbian here. My wife and I have our issues but damn. Could not have made it with a dude even if I had wanted to.

I've wished every day of my adult life that I was sexually attracted to women.

+1. Me too!

Hahahaha!

It’s time to go. Get a deeeevorce.

OP and others who don't like their SO,

I am so sorry for you all. I hope that things become better and that you all live in love and harmony.

Amen.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Every day this forum reminds me why I stay away from men.
Ladies, I hope it gets better for each of you soon.

+1

Lesbian here. My wife and I have our issues but damn. Could not have made it with a dude even if I had wanted to.

I've wished every day of my adult life that I was sexually attracted to women.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Every day this forum reminds me why I stay away from men.
Ladies, I hope it gets better for each of you soon.

+1

Lesbian here. My wife and I have our issues but damn. Could not have made it with a dude even if I had wanted to.

Please. Woman are just as bad as men. Women just complain about it more often online.