Anonymous wrote:I think 400K is enough especially with a reasonable mortgage. It's not clear to me why you need to move to an expensive area to go to a private school. Does the school not have buses? Is there not a way to transport your child there more cheaply than the increased mortgage expense?

Oops meant to write 300K. (My income is a third of that and my employer subsidized childcare is 24k (hoping to find home based care that is less) but when you have no choice you make it work.)

I think 400K is enough especially with a reasonable mortgage. It's not clear to me why you need to move to an expensive area to go to a private school. Does the school not have buses? Is there not a way to transport your child there more cheaply than the increased mortgage expense?

Anonymous wrote:GDS + STA alum here. Private school is dumb, a symptom of brand whore culture, and churns out many brats. Send your kids to Wilson or Whitman or BCC or whatever. 32k a year is idiotic and I’m shocked my parents spent that (wasn’t as much back when I went on a nominal basis but probably was basically equivalent).

As a public school teacher I actually have my kids in private. Much has changed since we were in school. What I see on a daily basis is disturbing and the absurd curriculum I'm shackled to is truly awful. I only remain teaching in public schools because I have a lot invested in my retirement benefits and I hope to at least make some sort of impact. The difference between what kids get in the right private school vs the best public school is not even a contest.

All of my income goes to tuition. However I have a high earner spouse. I do enjoy working and can't think of another job that would give me so much time off (as I sit here on a south Florida beach browsing DCUM). However the state of public schools is truly the pits.

Our HHI is $160k and I pay $14k for private. We could swing the $32k if we had to, but it would limit our savings and vacation. It all depends on your lifestyle.

Anonymous wrote:All of this is very relative. My parents paid for 3 kids to go through private at $8 to $12K per year each on a 60K salary back in the 80s. Some years the tuition must have been around $30K, or at least $25 (we did work study), and you just know the IRS probably only let him see ~40K of that.

We took cheap vacations, our mom sewed our clothes, we shopped at a distant army commissary once a month and froze our milk, and never went to birthday parties because we couldn't buy gifts. But my parents made it work.

If you can't afford private school that costs 1/10 of your salary when my parents did it on a ratio closer to 1/2, it's because you just don't want or need it enough, not because you can't really afford it.

Good one. My parents sent us all to private school as well, they just stopped eating Avocado toast at brunch once a week and it all worked out.

OP, don't forget that tuition and fees will increase every year. By the time your kid is in high school, you should plan on it being close to 50k.

GDS + STA alum here. Private school is dumb, a symptom of brand whore culture, and churns out many brats. Send your kids to Wilson or Whitman or BCC or whatever. 32k a year is idiotic and I’m shocked my parents spent that (wasn’t as much back when I went on a nominal basis but probably was basically equivalent).

We could definitely afford it at HHI $205K but our mortgage is only $2k/month. I don't think we'd be able to do the many other things we'd like to do with our money though if we had to pay private tuition (especially tuition that expensive! private tuition here is around $15k per year but we are in a very LCOL area now). However, I probably would only choose private school as a last resort and would hire private tutors first unless my kid was in a bullying situation of some kind or otherwise really really needed to be in a private school.

We live in an area with "great" public schools....until the pandemic hit. We have had our 2 kids in in person
5 days a week private school since the start of this school year. We will continue for the foreseeable future. I don't want my kids back in public schools with a peer group so far behind them.

Combined HHI just over 500k in 2020 in W2 income. Mortgage 2k/mo. Two investment properties (so we have to plan for the worst and have carrying costs which only amount to 2400/mo combined).

Tuition is 60k total before fees and extras.

The educational difference between our "excellent public schools and the private is stark. The standard for public schools is very pitifully low. The ELA education alone is worth it.

No way in helllll would I send my kids to school in Baltimore. There is no diversity. None. And the kids are overwhelming from complete disaster parents without a father in sight. This schools will fail no matter what when coming from those families.

Anonymous wrote:Pp here. That being said, we will probably be able to cash flow about that amount for college if we need to on 250k. It all depends on your priorities! Our housing costs and other expenses are low.

Check out the price of colleges right now. If you have kids in grade school, it's going up from there. Don't count on cash flowing college on a 250K income.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think most people who send their kids to private either come from family money, live in an area with poor public schools, has a child with special needs or social needs or extremely high income.

We have a high income (seven figures), high net worth and can afford private school tuition but our kids are thriving in public. DH and I both went to public school and top colleges and grad schools. We prefer to pay for our kids’ college and grad school, wedding and future down payments. If kids struggled in school and were not getting what they needed, we absolutely would send our kids to private.

I also find that some families with limited income send their kids because of their faith/religion.

Really? I think that's just something people say to shut the conversation down. That's why Catholic schools need to stay so affordable. No other religion has a cohesive enough school system to make that argument stick.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sounds like you live over your means. We make $150K or so and we could comfortably do it. You can very easily do it but may need to reconsider your housing options.

OP here. I don't think that you can afford $32k private school on a $150k gross HHI.

I don't want to have to commute one hour to get to the private school, which is close to my office. So for this reason we would like to live closer by, hence the more expensive house.

I KNOW we can as we've done it for a few years as we have a child with SN and who needed therapies. You don't need to move closer or get a more expensive house, you choose to want it. Need vs. want. We live in a very small, cheapest house in the neighborhood at the time we could find and have aggressively paid the mortgage so in a few years it will be paid off. So, in two years it will be paid off (but we could do it now) and we drive older car/paid off car. Its how you spend/manage your money. Your priority is a house and mortgage so no you cannot but you could if you wanted to.

Wouldn't work for us. We are a 2 income.household and invest in 401k to the max. Paying that tuition on your income is dumb AF.

Anonymous wrote:I think most people who send their kids to private either come from family money, live in an area with poor public schools, has a child with special needs or social needs or extremely high income.

We have a high income (seven figures), high net worth and can afford private school tuition but our kids are thriving in public. DH and I both went to public school and top colleges and grad schools. We prefer to pay for our kids’ college and grad school, wedding and future down payments. If kids struggled in school and were not getting what they needed, we absolutely would send our kids to private.

I also find that some families with limited income send their kids because of their faith/religion.

OP, don’t do it. I appreciate it’s hard to say no to a child’s “dream school,” but she is a child and you need to determine what is best for your family. Uprooting and moving to a more expensive house to attend private school for a few years is crazy. Furthermore, it sounds like you will feel money is tight. Your daughter will inevitably feel that pressure, and the pressure to hang with her more well-off classmates. It’s a recipe for stress and resentment. Find a private school you like near your current home, or move to a more expensive area with better public schools. Don’t do both.

Pp here. That being said, we will probably be able to cash flow about that amount for college if we need to on 250k. It all depends on your priorities! Our housing costs and other expenses are low.