Anonymous
Post 03/09/2021 20:41     Subject: Re:15 year old doesn’t want braces
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Does she not want them because of the way they look? I'm not saying you should let her go without for that reason, but I sympathize with a teenager not wanting the look of braces in HS when most of her peers are done with that. Is Invisalign or clear braces an option?


I was going to suggest Invisalign as well.

We got a consultation for braces for my kid when she was 12 (which I thought was the magic number for braces) and asked about what kind to get - traditional metal or Invisalign etc. The orthodontist told us that that there was no rush to get it done early other than the fact that in middle school it is easier socially, because "almost everyone" has braces and he also pointed out that the old school metal kind was like a right of passage. (And it was true; about half of my kids' friends had braces during 6-9th grade). I definitely understand not wanting them at age 15, because my now 14 year old cannot wait to get them off before high school. She also wears glasses and has acne, so is excited to start wearing contacts and we are already working on getting the acne cleared up.

This age is tough, and I would want to make it as easy as possible for my kid. SHe will have enough other hurdles to get over, that I won't be able to help with.


What about braces on the inside of the teeth so you can’t see them? They’re the traditional kind that can’t be removed, but not really visible. My daughter just started with her braces (Invisalign) but that was one of our options.


Invisalign is a no-go, due to the anorexia. ☹️
Anonymous
Post 03/09/2021 20:37     Subject: Re:15 year old doesn’t want braces
Are you sure Invisalign is contraindicated? Obviously if that’s what medical professionals tell you don’t do it, but it’s otherwise an excellent option and was only modestly more costly from our orthodontist. My 15 year old DS has them because he didn’t want traditional braces at his age (he lost his teeth really late so he couldn’t really start until 14)
Anonymous
Post 03/09/2021 20:21     Subject: 15 year old doesn’t want braces
Anonymous wrote:Depending on how her anorexia manifested itself, I think I’d be concerned that all the rules about foods you can’t eat and things you can’t do with braces might bring up old issues. Definitely talk with the therapist before making any decisions, and pre-screen the ortho be sure they’re sensitive to the situation and willing to ease her into the process.

Also, I wonder whether an ortho who specializes in adults might be better than a practice focused on young kids? It might make her feel less self-conscious to know she’s not the first person ever to have braces past the fifth grade, and they wouldn’t try to pretend that she can make them look cool “by choosing blue rubber bands!”


Yes, there would be a lot of screening and prepping. I like the idea of an ortho with adult clients - thank you. We would need to have no food rules - just chew carefully, and deal with broken brackets if necessary. That plus mouth pain is why we couldn’t do it when she was more ill.
Anonymous
Post 03/09/2021 20:16     Subject: 15 year old doesn’t want braces
Depending on how her anorexia manifested itself, I think I’d be concerned that all the rules about foods you can’t eat and things you can’t do with braces might bring up old issues. Definitely talk with the therapist before making any decisions, and pre-screen the ortho be sure they’re sensitive to the situation and willing to ease her into the process.

Also, I wonder whether an ortho who specializes in adults might be better than a practice focused on young kids? It might make her feel less self-conscious to know she’s not the first person ever to have braces past the fifth grade, and they wouldn’t try to pretend that she can make them look cool “by choosing blue rubber bands!”
Anonymous
Post 03/09/2021 19:50     Subject: 15 year old doesn’t want braces
Invisalign!!!!
Anonymous
Post 03/09/2021 19:49     Subject: 15 year old doesn’t want braces
Just tell her that she can either get them now, when you’ll pay for it, or wait and see you f she wants them as an adult and pay for it herself. It’s much worse when you’re an adult.
Anonymous
Post 03/09/2021 19:18     Subject: 15 year old doesn’t want braces
Oh, man. I know you are trying to help your daughter, but please, please, drop this for now. She is going through so much. This will not really matter at all until she graduates from college, and she can deal with it then.

Wouldn't you rather focus on rebuilding your relationship after all you have have been through together? I don't say that to be judgmental; it just seems like you really love your kid, and I would think you would want to just be for a minute.
Anonymous
Post 03/09/2021 18:57     Subject: 15 year old doesn’t want braces
Tell her you'd like to get her braces and when she's ready let you know and you'll take her to a few orthodontists and get different recommendations and then she can decide which she likes best (price considered). Why not do invisalign? If she says no tell her the offer is always open and its up to her. Don't force it. She can always do it as an adult.
Anonymous
Post 03/09/2021 17:59     Subject: 15 year old doesn’t want braces
I’m sorry op. This is tough. If it were me, I would write her a note and tell her that you will put away the money for the braces and whenever she’s ready it’s there for her.
Anonymous
Post 03/09/2021 17:24     Subject: 15 year old doesn’t want braces
I have a 14 yo who is pretty mature (so maybe like a 15 yo?). If it were us, I would probably point out why it makes sense to do them (career, you are paying v. her later), but I wouldn't force it. Admittedly, I think I personally would feel off the hook financially and logistically. I was thinking this before I read about the anorexia (because she's 15 and it's a hard time image wise) - but now I really think it. Although i Don't have a lot of experience with eating disorders. assuming she has a therapist, I might ask therapsit because it does seem you ar ein murky water here
Anonymous
Post 03/09/2021 17:15     Subject: Re:15 year old doesn’t want braces
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I think part of the issue with anorexia and Invisalign is the focus on taking them in and out for meals which could be a trigger. My children had stages of their Invisalign treatment where (per the doctors instructions) they were only wearing them after dinner till morning (and changed retainers less frequently.) maybe it’s worth discussing with the orthodontist if Invisalign would be possible with an altered/longer timeline that allowed them to be worn part time.


Sorry I didn’t see your post about it never being an option.


That’s okay. Your suggestion doesn’t quite work, but it is interesting. And you are right. The Invisalign hygiene process discourages casual snacking, and that’s the opposite what we are trying to do.
Anonymous
Post 03/09/2021 17:14     Subject: 15 year old doesn’t want braces
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:You have a child with significant mental health challenges. Unless they have a life threatening orthodontic situation this doesn’t seem that important. She can get braces later life if she wants to. It just doesn’t seem worth ruining your relationship over.


Yeah, that’s why I didn’t do it earlier. Our relationship is already really bad, due to the anorexia treatment. She’s been lashing out at me since school ended today, but I didn’t expect this at all. She was previously open to braces.


I'd drop it. She might be using it as a proxy for some other issue; fighting her on it might just make her dig in more, when it's not even the real problem.
Anonymous
Post 03/09/2021 17:13     Subject: 15 year old doesn’t want braces
Anonymous wrote:You have a child with significant mental health challenges. Unless they have a life threatening orthodontic situation this doesn’t seem that important. She can get braces later life if she wants to. It just doesn’t seem worth ruining your relationship over.


Yeah, that’s why I didn’t do it earlier. Our relationship is already really bad, due to the anorexia treatment. She’s been lashing out at me since school ended today, but I didn’t expect this at all. She was previously open to braces.
Anonymous
Post 03/09/2021 17:08     Subject: 15 year old doesn’t want braces
You have a child with significant mental health challenges. Unless they have a life threatening orthodontic situation this doesn’t seem that important. She can get braces later life if she wants to. It just doesn’t seem worth ruining your relationship over.
Anonymous
Post 03/09/2021 17:04     Subject: Re:15 year old doesn’t want braces
Anonymous wrote:I think part of the issue with anorexia and Invisalign is the focus on taking them in and out for meals which could be a trigger. My children had stages of their Invisalign treatment where (per the doctors instructions) they were only wearing them after dinner till morning (and changed retainers less frequently.) maybe it’s worth discussing with the orthodontist if Invisalign would be possible with an altered/longer timeline that allowed them to be worn part time.


Sorry I didn’t see your post about it never being an option.