Anonymous
Post 02/14/2021 17:30     Subject: Regrets?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My son would say to get more involved earlier on. He went into junior year with basically nothing but participating in a varsity sport. He didn’t get into NHS because of lack of leadership and volunteering which was actually a great wake up call for him. He spent junior and senior year getting more of that done and did get into NHS and his dream school even with a comparatively weak EC list.


Could you share the school? Thx.


UVA


Awesome!! Congrats.
Anonymous
Post 02/14/2021 16:16     Subject: Regrets?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Wasting time talking to our top private’s college counselor - school’s interests don’t really coincide with the bulk of its students in a given year.


Yup. I made this mistake as a senior at a big years ago, you obviously need to play the game and talk to the counselor, but don’t entirely trust her


+2 Arrived home after our first meeting with the school college counselor and immediately started calling private counseling companies. By the second kid, we had the counselor booked in 9th grade!
Anonymous
Post 02/14/2021 16:11     Subject: Re:Regrets?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:To those who recommend cutting back on sports to focus on GPA, don't kids need involvement with extracurriculars too? Our DS is in private in 9th, and the workload is intense. I can see the attraction to cutting back on sports, but would that just leave him with a higher GPA and not the other things he needs?


We never did sports and if hasn’t impacted our admissions yet. D had been accepted to multiple honors programs. GPA and SAT are more important. Colleges aren’t going to care enough whether your D was on a very casual sports team or one that requires a lot of practice.


But a lot of top privates in DC require sports participation, so out of our control!
Anonymous
Post 02/14/2021 14:48     Subject: Regrets?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My son would say to get more involved earlier on. He went into junior year with basically nothing but participating in a varsity sport. He didn’t get into NHS because of lack of leadership and volunteering which was actually a great wake up call for him. He spent junior and senior year getting more of that done and did get into NHS and his dream school even with a comparatively weak EC list.


Could you share the school? Thx.


UVA
Anonymous
Post 02/14/2021 14:16     Subject: Regrets?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My son and I visited UVA in the spring of this junior year. At the end of the presentation by the admissions person he looked over at me and said, “I wish I had heard all of this when I was in 8th grade or a freshman”. I thought that was pretty telling.


Do you know what specifically he wished he’d heard?


What it takes to get in. I.e. the GPA, the test scores and the leadership roles they are looking for. I interpreted it mean he would have done things differently, mainly around focusing on his grades. I remember sharing what it takes with him early on but sometimes your children need to hear it from someone else. Things worked out fine for him. He is at VT in a STEM major and doing well.
Anonymous
Post 02/14/2021 14:15     Subject: Regrets?
Anonymous wrote:Wasting time talking to our top private’s college counselor - school’s interests don’t really coincide with the bulk of its students in a given year.


Yup. I made this mistake as a senior at a big years ago, you obviously need to play the game and talk to the counselor, but don’t entirely trust her
Anonymous
Post 02/14/2021 14:13     Subject: Re:Regrets?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Echoing what the others said:

Work harder in 9th grade and actively seek help if you aren't doing wel.

Get involved at school early on to find something you are committed to and in which you can have a leadership position

Get to know your teachers and make sure they know you. This can include getting extra help during lunch and study hall. My son is a senior, and when they left school last March, he felt ill prepared to ask for recommendations. Since then, I've been telling my younger kids that they should work and act each day in each class as if they will be asking the teacher for a recommendation.

Keep track of everything you do from 9th grade on in resume form so that you won't forget. Just seeing how it looks on paper is motivating.

Use time in in 10th grade and summers to explore career interests and possible college choices. With DL, kids can take virtual tours during lunch time instead of messing around online.

Use the summer to explore interests and college options if you can. One of the lucky decisions we made last year was letting one kid quit his travel soccer team that he wasn't enjoying. That freed up time for us to visit colleges with our older son before the pandemic struck. It's never too soon to start thinking about this and you never know what is going to happen.

Work on your college essays the summer between junior and senior year and have them revised and in final form by the time applications open.


This is good adivce.


Thanks PP and the other person who thanked me. This is my first time going through the college admission cycle and it has turned out fairly well for my son. Even so, he realized during the process that there were things he would like to change or could have done better. In the kindest possible way, because I don't want to make him feel bad especially during this difficult year, we talked through some of the things he wishes he could redo. We framed this discussion as an way to examine some of the choices he made in an effort improve on his high school experience in college. My son is not one to put himself out there, and in retrospect, I wish I had pushed him more in terms of activities and socializing. He too wishes he had ventured outside his comfort zone more and earlier in his high school experience. I was impressed with the things he identified as regrets. He has been mature enough to own them and to pass what he learned on to his siblings.
Anonymous
Post 02/14/2021 14:06     Subject: Regrets?
Anonymous wrote:13:46 perfect advice! Thank you so much! mine are not in high school yet so I really appreciate it.


Yes! Thank you!
Anonymous
Post 02/14/2021 14:06     Subject: Regrets?
13:46 is absolutely correct about college essays. My D was so angry that I harped on her all sumner to get them done but was relieved once school started that they and most of her apps were complete
Anonymous
Post 02/14/2021 14:04     Subject: Re:Regrets?
Anonymous wrote:Echoing what the others said:

Work harder in 9th grade and actively seek help if you aren't doing wel.

Get involved at school early on to find something you are committed to and in which you can have a leadership position

Get to know your teachers and make sure they know you. This can include getting extra help during lunch and study hall. My son is a senior, and when they left school last March, he felt ill prepared to ask for recommendations. Since then, I've been telling my younger kids that they should work and act each day in each class as if they will be asking the teacher for a recommendation.

Keep track of everything you do from 9th grade on in resume form so that you won't forget. Just seeing how it looks on paper is motivating.

Use time in in 10th grade and summers to explore career interests and possible college choices. With DL, kids can take virtual tours during lunch time instead of messing around online.

Use the summer to explore interests and college options if you can. One of the lucky decisions we made last year was letting one kid quit his travel soccer team that he wasn't enjoying. That freed up time for us to visit colleges with our older son before the pandemic struck. It's never too soon to start thinking about this and you never know what is going to happen.

Work on your college essays the summer between junior and senior year and have them revised and in final form by the time applications open.


This is good adivce.
Anonymous
Post 02/14/2021 14:01     Subject: Regrets?
Anonymous wrote:What about the pressure to sign up for intensified courses in 9th grade and/or taking lots of AP classes?


AP courses, my kids loved particularly my last one who figured out the work in those classes ended earlier than other classes. He took as many as he could. LOL

In our, HS AP classes no work after the exam. Just movies and some worksheets nothing big.

As for choosing how many to take, I would still have my kids take anyone they were interested in. But would also ask them if they wanted to take any classes at local community college senior year or the summer before.

Anonymous
Post 02/14/2021 13:56     Subject: Regrets?
13:46 perfect advice! Thank you so much! mine are not in high school yet so I really appreciate it.
Anonymous
Post 02/14/2021 13:46     Subject: Re:Regrets?
Echoing what the others said:

Work harder in 9th grade and actively seek help if you aren't doing wel.

Get involved at school early on to find something you are committed to and in which you can have a leadership position

Get to know your teachers and make sure they know you. This can include getting extra help during lunch and study hall. My son is a senior, and when they left school last March, he felt ill prepared to ask for recommendations. Since then, I've been telling my younger kids that they should work and act each day in each class as if they will be asking the teacher for a recommendation.

Keep track of everything you do from 9th grade on in resume form so that you won't forget. Just seeing how it looks on paper is motivating.

Use time in in 10th grade and summers to explore career interests and possible college choices. With DL, kids can take virtual tours during lunch time instead of messing around online.

Use the summer to explore interests and college options if you can. One of the lucky decisions we made last year was letting one kid quit his travel soccer team that he wasn't enjoying. That freed up time for us to visit colleges with our older son before the pandemic struck. It's never too soon to start thinking about this and you never know what is going to happen.

Work on your college essays the summer between junior and senior year and have them revised and in final form by the time applications open.
Anonymous
Post 02/14/2021 13:45     Subject: Re:Regrets?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:To those who recommend cutting back on sports to focus on GPA, don't kids need involvement with extracurriculars too? Our DS is in private in 9th, and the workload is intense. I can see the attraction to cutting back on sports, but would that just leave him with a higher GPA and not the other things he needs?


We never did sports and if hasn’t impacted our admissions yet. D had been accepted to multiple honors programs. GPA and SAT are more important. Colleges aren’t going to care enough whether your D was on a very casual sports team or one that requires a lot of practice.


I agree. The point is not that you do zero sports if your kid likes sports, but that the high school team actually is enough if you aren't hoping to be recruited (and 98% of kids will not be recruited).
Anonymous
Post 02/14/2021 13:43     Subject: Regrets?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:We would have moved DC to private for middle school. We would have hired a tutor sooner. We would have cut way back on sports in high school.


Why private for middle school? Smaller class sizes?


To learn rigorous study skills. For a very bright kid, MS was too easy and required no effort, almost no homework, not enough feed back, very little studying for tests, too many second chances. Old habits die hard, and by the time DC caught on to the higher expectations in this private HS, the GPA was toast. Hopefully the old "colleges love to see a progress pattern" theme is true. As a student, DC is transformed, but I can see how it would have been better if we had switched sooner.