Hmmmm.

I was a live-in nanny for a family with 7 kids, in a 3 bedroom house. The younger kids (1yo b, 3yo g, 5yo g, 6yo b, 8yo b) were all in one room, one set of bunk beds and a bed that folded down from the wall (not a Murphy). The two older girls (10yo, 12yo) had a small room. I had a small room. Their father slept on the living room couch.

We moved. 14, 12, 7 and 5yo girls were in one bedroom with 2 sets of bunk beds. I was in the very small bedroom that was also used for storage. 10, 8 and 3yo boys were in the last bedroom with their father, again with 2 sets of bunk beds.

A few years later in a new house, and the kids were thrilled with the space:
Dad had a room
I had a room
Boys shared
Younger girls had a room
Older girls shared a room, then the eldest moved out.

Step-mom and her 2 daughters moved in.
2 16yo girls shared a room
The 12yo moved in with the younger girls.

The last time I talked to them, they had 4 rooms again.
Parents have a room.
Boys (17, 15, 10) have a room.
Girls (16, 14, 12) have a room.
His mom and her mom share a room (both are old and infirm enough that they can't live alone).

With the exception of the second oldest child, not a single one of those 9 children ever asked for their own room. And the child who did? She wanted it so that she could sneak out without waking up her siblings, so that she wouldn't get in trouble. The rest all understand how big families work, and they like having siblings around.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They should each have their own bedroom. Otherwise don't have that many kids. You can't afford it

I totally agree

Kids are entitled to privacy.

This is just such different thinking than how ppl around me approach the topic. We're in a high cost city where one or two million may not get you more than 2 bedrooms. Everyone shares if there's more than 1 kid, and we're doing fine! Kids are as happy and well adjusted as anywhere.

My daughters share a room and my son has his own. Learning to share is a good thing.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They should each have their own bedroom. Otherwise don't have that many kids. You can't afford it

I totally agree

Kids are entitled to privacy.

Anonymous wrote:They should each have their own bedroom. Otherwise don't have that many kids. You can't afford it

I totally agree

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have three kids in a three bedroom house. They’re all fairly close in age. Right now the two older kids (same gender) share and the baby (opposite gender) does not, but I could see that changing in the future.

We often have out of town guests and the baby sleeps in our room when there are visitors. We have a king-sized futon in that room and will probably put a queen bed in there when baby is out of the crib.

Ideally we will move to a four bedroom house before the oldest is in middle school, but we like our house and love our neighborhood, so it may not be possible to upgrade in the same neighborhood.

I had a double bed as a ES kid because my room doubled as a guest room. No big deal. It was fun for me to camp elsewhere in the house ... or in a tent in the backyard!

My parents did the same thing (gave me a double bed so guests could use it) and I hated it. I'd have homework to do and couldn't do it at the desk in my room...it was hard doing it at the kitchen table because that's where everyone was sitting around and socializing...it sucked. Plus the feeling of having no privacy because other people were in my room and I wasn't even allowed to go in. I vowed to never do that to my kids.

**PP that hated it here...I forgot to mention that in my case, it wasn't elementary school, it was 8th grade-high school age that I was being kicked out of my room.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have three kids in a three bedroom house. They’re all fairly close in age. Right now the two older kids (same gender) share and the baby (opposite gender) does not, but I could see that changing in the future.

We often have out of town guests and the baby sleeps in our room when there are visitors. We have a king-sized futon in that room and will probably put a queen bed in there when baby is out of the crib.

Ideally we will move to a four bedroom house before the oldest is in middle school, but we like our house and love our neighborhood, so it may not be possible to upgrade in the same neighborhood.

I had a double bed as a ES kid because my room doubled as a guest room. No big deal. It was fun for me to camp elsewhere in the house ... or in a tent in the backyard!

My parents did the same thing (gave me a double bed so guests could use it) and I hated it. I'd have homework to do and couldn't do it at the desk in my room...it was hard doing it at the kitchen table because that's where everyone was sitting around and socializing...it sucked. Plus the feeling of having no privacy because other people were in my room and I wasn't even allowed to go in. I vowed to never do that to my kids.

My older girls (5 and 7) share a room and our boy has his own room, but sleeps with us. We have 2 empty bedroom/study rooms, but girls want to be together. I suspect that our bau will want to join them soon...

OP, no need to have a dedicated guest room. The kids can temporarily share when you have visitors.

My kids (2 boys) shared a room for 7 years and loved it. My middle schooler just moved into the guest room bc the virtual school hours are so different (they do school in their rooms). That said, when we have guests the kids will bunk in the one room and allow guests use of the other room. Not a big deal.

I used to babysit for someone who had 5 boys. At one point the oldest 4 all had bunk beds in the biggest room ( not the master) dorm style, their choice. I think as ages changed they moved around. They had a 5 bedroom house so no guest room and at least 2 of the boys would have to share.

Anonymous wrote:I have three kids in a three bedroom house. They’re all fairly close in age. Right now the two older kids (same gender) share and the baby (opposite gender) does not, but I could see that changing in the future.

We often have out of town guests and the baby sleeps in our room when there are visitors. We have a king-sized futon in that room and will probably put a queen bed in there when baby is out of the crib.

Ideally we will move to a four bedroom house before the oldest is in middle school, but we like our house and love our neighborhood, so it may not be possible to upgrade in the same neighborhood.

I had a double bed as a ES kid because my room doubled as a guest room. No big deal. It was fun for me to camp elsewhere in the house ... or in a tent in the backyard!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They should each have their own bedroom. Otherwise don't have that many kids. You can't afford it

Agree. Hated sharing a room as a kid. I’m an introvert that needs space. Don’t force this unless your kids want to share rooms.

Well some of us would have taken the sibling over the shared room in a heartbeat. Kinda hard for a parent to gauge the child’s preference before birth.

That’s why you purchase a house that’s got enough bedrooms for everyone. Kids can share if they want or choose not to.

Nope that is unnecessary.

NP. We have plenty of bedrooms but our kids (middle schoolers) do not have a choice. They will not live with us forever (hopefully), and I want them to know how to live with other people. Too many kids I’ve met in college and now do not know how to cohabitate with other people. Neighbors have 1000-1500sq ft per person in their homes. The kids fall apart have to share dorm rooms. It’s ridiculous. Sharing a room now is not a guarantee that they’ll get along with future roommates / housemates but I hope it will make the transition out of the family nest easier.

I have three kids in a three bedroom house. They’re all fairly close in age. Right now the two older kids (same gender) share and the baby (opposite gender) does not, but I could see that changing in the future.

We often have out of town guests and the baby sleeps in our room when there are visitors. We have a king-sized futon in that room and will probably put a queen bed in there when baby is out of the crib.

Ideally we will move to a four bedroom house before the oldest is in middle school, but we like our house and love our neighborhood, so it may not be possible to upgrade in the same neighborhood.

Anonymous wrote:When I first moved to the US, I was an only child in a 1 bedroom apartment with my parents and my paternal grandparents. Later, at one point, I lived in a 2 bedroom apartment with my parents, a sister, a grandmother and an uncle. I don't remember being bothered by it. I was very close with my grandparents and my uncle was funny and good with kids. Many of my friends from the same country lived in similar households. Depends what you're used to I guess.

Sorry, I didn't actually respond to the OP. My oldest two kids share a room. They're both girls and they are very happy to share at this point. As they get older, we will see how well they continue to get along. I would not keep them together if they were like oil and water. Not worth it.

When I first moved to the US, I was an only child in a 1 bedroom apartment with my parents and my paternal grandparents. Later, at one point, I lived in a 2 bedroom apartment with my parents, a sister, a grandmother and an uncle. I don't remember being bothered by it. I was very close with my grandparents and my uncle was funny and good with kids. Many of my friends from the same country lived in similar households. Depends what you're used to I guess.