When she asks why she can’t have what her friends are having, tell her people’s bodies work differently and her body doesn’t burn up fuel the same way her friends’ bodies do. Or tell her that you are interested in her health and nutrition, and other families may not prioritize those things in exact the same way. Focus on exercise and fitness, energy and metabolism, health and strength. Not on weight and chubby was and how she looks.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you are fat, she will be fat. Just facts of genetics and environment. You have to be healthy together.

This. It is rare to see an overweight kid and thin parents.

This is OP - DH and I are in very good shape but we work hard for it because we are not naturally thin people. We eat extremely healthy 95% of the time (lean meat, fruits and veggies - rarely any carbs or starch or sugar) but do indulge when there is a reason to. DH is a marathon runner and runs 5 days a week. He constantly asks DD to go with him and I try to get her to do yoga with me but she is not interested in either. She is a fairly lazy kid so we do take walks and hikes but she complains the whole way.

Sign her up for a sport like soccer or basketball with a lot of running. Most kids don’t want to go running or do yoga. They want to do something fun with other kids.

My 10 year old has always whined about walks and exercise too. He's been 95 and 97th percentile for height and weight.

He isn't overweight though. He gained a little during the shutdown but is back to his normal again. He does not do much exercise.

I put out lots of fruit and veggies, but I let both my kids self regulate. At school they have to eat at set times, but at home, other than dinner, I let them eat or not eat when they're hungry. So they might eat a lot or not eat at all until 2pm.

Is she okay? Does she have stress or bad experiences from you guys or other people in her life ?

At this point I would swap her favorites for healthier versions. Buy annies cheddar bunnies instead of goldfish. Once she's no longer hooked on all the additive crap in the typical food, her cravings may lessen on their own, and she will start to want healthier food.

Serve the fruits in veggies in fun and visually appealing ways.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you are fat, she will be fat. Just facts of genetics and environment. You have to be healthy together.

This. It is rare to see an overweight kid and thin parents.

This is OP - DH and I are in very good shape but we work hard for it because we are not naturally thin people. We eat extremely healthy 95% of the time (lean meat, fruits and veggies - rarely any carbs or starch or sugar) but do indulge when there is a reason to. DH is a marathon runner and runs 5 days a week. He constantly asks DD to go with him and I try to get her to do yoga with me but she is not interested in either. She is a fairly lazy kid so we do take walks and hikes but she complains the whole way.

Sounds genetic to me. Focus on her being healthy regardless her size. Explore healthy food, and move a lot. Go on walks and bike rides as a family. Find sports you can play. Emphasize exercise and healthy food, and then let it go.

Nothing. Offer healthy foods and get her outside more.

at her age worry less about diet and more about exercise. An 8 year old should be burning off a ton of calories just through play. If she doesn't do a sport or physical activity like dance, sign her up.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Cut out any processed foods that have sugar in the ingredient list. Bacon and eggs for breakfast instead of cereal or bagels. Try to limit bread until she’s at a normal weight again: so, instead of sandwiches for lunch, try cold cuts and cheese and fruit and nuts, and make some seeded flax crackers if she wants something crunchy with cheese. Fresh fruit only, no dried fruit.

It’s actually really easy for kids to lose weight this way. Granola bars and goldfish crackers and dried fruit are pretty much straight sugar in quantities that some kids will gain very rapidly while eating.

Just to add — the emphasis in the above is on foods that will trigger satiety. She’s eating “large volumes” as you say because she doesn’t feel full. High fat, moderate protein, low carb foods fill you up more effectively and trigger satiety faster.

My daughter is younger, but similarly proportioned (always over the 95th percentile for height and weight) and I agree with this. It's counter-intuitive to push fat and protein for a bigger kid, but my daughter just does not feel satiated with carbs and fruit. We do not keep the snacks you mentioned (goldfish, pirate booty, granola bars) in the house except for occasional special treats. She's good at self limiting sweets and even carby snacks, but the volume of carby snacks she can down before self limiting is just too high. Snacks are real food and are either whole fruits/veggies or include fat and protein if it's a substantial snack. So cheese stick with an apple, banana and peanut butter, cheese and seeded grain crackers, carrots and plain greek yogurt with a squirt of honey.

And distance learning is so hard, but more physical activity as a family. I think "bigger" kids that tend towards gaining weight really need a sport. It changes your body type and metabolism longer term and burns calories. Could you try mommy/daddy daughter tennis lessons or bike riding? Exercise is lifestyle and you really have to model a healthy lifestyle for your kids.

And good luck, it's hard right now! You shouldn't discuss it with her, but shift the entire family's eating and activity habits, and hopefully you'll see some movement in the right direction.

Anonymous wrote:Cut out any processed foods that have sugar in the ingredient list. Bacon and eggs for breakfast instead of cereal or bagels. Try to limit bread until she’s at a normal weight again: so, instead of sandwiches for lunch, try cold cuts and cheese and fruit and nuts, and make some seeded flax crackers if she wants something crunchy with cheese. Fresh fruit only, no dried fruit.

It’s actually really easy for kids to lose weight this way. Granola bars and goldfish crackers and dried fruit are pretty much straight sugar in quantities that some kids will gain very rapidly while eating.

Just to add — the emphasis in the above is on foods that will trigger satiety. She’s eating “large volumes” as you say because she doesn’t feel full. High fat, moderate protein, low carb foods fill you up more effectively and trigger satiety faster.

Cut out any processed foods that have sugar in the ingredient list. Bacon and eggs for breakfast instead of cereal or bagels. Try to limit bread until she’s at a normal weight again: so, instead of sandwiches for lunch, try cold cuts and cheese and fruit and nuts, and make some seeded flax crackers if she wants something crunchy with cheese. Fresh fruit only, no dried fruit.

It’s actually really easy for kids to lose weight this way. Granola bars and goldfish crackers and dried fruit are pretty much straight sugar in quantities that some kids will gain very rapidly while eating.

She is fat because you were fat.

I was a stick skinny kid and so are my kids. I’m constantly trying to fatten up my boys. I want them to grow.

Anonymous wrote:Nothing. You say nothing. There is no good way to tell her to lose weight. You model a healthy lifestyle and get her moving. And say nothing.

This. You change the food in the house, but obviously still allow treats here and there. You encourage moderation by get prepackaged snacks or package bulk food in snack/sandwich bags or tupperware. You prewash fruits and veggies and pack them in baggies or tupperware easily accessible in the fridge. Kids are more likely to eat the right foods and moderate their eating when there are things readily available to grab.

You can also enforce no food anywhere but kitchen. So there is no eating while gaming or watching tv. No food in bedroom.

And then you encourage activity. Sports are back. Biking, walking the dog 2x a day as a "chore", or even walking with family after dinner or during lunch break. Get matching pedometers and play a game to outpace each other over the week - winner chooses the Friday night movie or night out idea. Which brings to me another very important thing. Do NOT use food as a reward. Anything but food. Extra screen time, a special toy, a pick of a movie, etc...

And do not go by weight. Girls start gaining some extra weight from 8-11yrs before they get their growth spurt and when they start growing quickly they may gain weight but actually lose that kid body fat. They are growing hips and getting boobs soon too. So don't put a scale near her.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She's gained weight during the pandemic. So have lots of kids and adults.

This isn't a problem until after the pandemic is 100% over and she is back to daily PE and regular life. Then worry about it.

Disagree. My nephew who is 7 was a big kid also in the 90% with maybe pinch 2 inches on his belly now. Well since March, he has gained a lot of weight with a beer belly, is now in the obese range, and his pediatrician says he needs to lose weight at 7. Childhood type 2 diabetes is a huge problem in this country in obese kids.

So OP, you are doing the right thing to be concerned, take action, and ask for advice.

My son is a type I diabetic. I've literally never met a child that was type 2.

It’s strongly associated with poverty and food deserts. That’s why you don’t know kids with it.

OP: “which foods are good and bad”? Really?

You shouldn't say anything. Mind your own business and leave her alone. She knows she has gained weight and doesn't need more stress.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She's gained weight during the pandemic. So have lots of kids and adults.

This isn't a problem until after the pandemic is 100% over and she is back to daily PE and regular life. Then worry about it.

Disagree. My nephew who is 7 was a big kid also in the 90% with maybe pinch 2 inches on his belly now. Well since March, he has gained a lot of weight with a beer belly, is now in the obese range, and his pediatrician says he needs to lose weight at 7. Childhood type 2 diabetes is a huge problem in this country in obese kids.

So OP, you are doing the right thing to be concerned, take action, and ask for advice.

My son is a type I diabetic. I've literally never met a child that was type 2.

I’m in the medical field. Yes, we are seeing many more cases of type 2 diabetes in kids. It’s a big problem. Developing this also increases their risk of complications from this in early adulthood such as atherosclerosis, renal insufficiency, neuropathy, retinopathy, etc...

Type 2 used to be a disease of middle age overweight/obese people who then, if left uncontrolled would develop complications 10 years or so later.

Now we are seeing it in children who then can develop these complications in their late 20’s and 30’s.

See 2 links below. The 2nd like might be a little technical but the 1st 2 paragraphs under commentary is a good short summary. It was also published in 2005. Rats of obesity and Type 2 diabetes had been increasing ever since so prevalence is much higher today in children.

https://www.endocrine.org/news-and-advocacy/news-room/2017/childhood-obesity-quadruples-risk-of-developing-type-2-diabetes#:~:text=Children%20with%20obesity%20face%20four%20times%20the%20risk,Both%20obesity%20and%20diabetes%20are%20epidemic%20health%20problems.


https://clinical.diabetesjournals.org/content/23/4/181