Anonymous wrote:This is what my best gay friend just told me. I'm in my 20s and he says if I ever want to get married I will have to tolerate being annoyed because for some reason all men are annoying.
I wanted to hear people's thoughts on this. He said women arent as annoying but he doesn't know why. I guess I dont know whether I want to get married if that's what it will be
Anonymous wrote:I have been married for 11 years and can confirm that there is a constant level of annoyance at my husband always. Sometimes a high level, sometimes low, but it’s always there.
Honestly, had I known that marriage to a woman would have been an option, I would have gone that route.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:It’s the emotional differences that vary person to person. Hell, children are perpetually annoying and I would literally give my life for mine. That sacrificial attitude is much more common with women than men. Maybe that is what your bestie is alluding to.
That might be it. That and being aware of/empathetic to other people's feelings. Basically I was venting about my current boyfriend and how annoyed I was by something he did and he said every single man is annoying and I'll have to get used to it. I said I thought there must be men out there who aren't annoying and who will make a good partner and he said no, every man is annoying, and I'll have to deal with it if I want to get married.
I guess I'm not sure what to think. He's very insightful 99% of the time and I trust his judgment, even if it can be brutally honest at times
What did your boyfriend do that was annoying?
I decided to cook him a really nice, elaborate dinner and he barely said two words to me as he saw I was cooking it. Just walked past me to grab a beer, then walked to the TV, plopped down and turned it on.
That is a person issue, not a gender issue. I am a poster from p1 joking about marrying a woman. If your boyfriend is like this now, it doesn’t get much better. Everyone has tough days but kindness and respect is something that should always be there.
Do not play wife with him. Your friend probably is happy to commiserate. But all men are not that way. Men I dated cooked for me, threw rose petals on the floor once when I came in, surprised me with their own cooking, and even if I made something horrible they were enthusiastic about it. Not saying someone else has to do the same for you, but just know that there are many men who aren’t this way. Everyone gets annoyed some more than others. But this is being inconsiderate, it is a character thing. Not a gender thing.
Thanks for this advice. This was my instinct too. I dont think it's acceptable and I think there are plenty of nice, considerate men out there
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:It’s the emotional differences that vary person to person. Hell, children are perpetually annoying and I would literally give my life for mine. That sacrificial attitude is much more common with women than men. Maybe that is what your bestie is alluding to.
That might be it. That and being aware of/empathetic to other people's feelings. Basically I was venting about my current boyfriend and how annoyed I was by something he did and he said every single man is annoying and I'll have to get used to it. I said I thought there must be men out there who aren't annoying and who will make a good partner and he said no, every man is annoying, and I'll have to deal with it if I want to get married.
I guess I'm not sure what to think. He's very insightful 99% of the time and I trust his judgment, even if it can be brutally honest at times
What did your boyfriend do that was annoying?
I decided to cook him a really nice, elaborate dinner and he barely said two words to me as he saw I was cooking it. Just walked past me to grab a beer, then walked to the TV, plopped down and turned it on.
That is a person issue, not a gender issue. I am a poster from p1 joking about marrying a woman. If your boyfriend is like this now, it doesn’t get much better. Everyone has tough days but kindness and respect is something that should always be there.
Do not play wife with him. Your friend probably is happy to commiserate. But all men are not that way. Men I dated cooked for me, threw rose petals on the floor once when I came in, surprised me with their own cooking, and even if I made something horrible they were enthusiastic about it. Not saying someone else has to do the same for you, but just know that there are many men who aren’t this way. Everyone gets annoyed some more than others. But this is being inconsiderate, it is a character thing. Not a gender thing.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:It’s the emotional differences that vary person to person. Hell, children are perpetually annoying and I would literally give my life for mine. That sacrificial attitude is much more common with women than men. Maybe that is what your bestie is alluding to.
That might be it. That and being aware of/empathetic to other people's feelings. Basically I was venting about my current boyfriend and how annoyed I was by something he did and he said every single man is annoying and I'll have to get used to it. I said I thought there must be men out there who aren't annoying and who will make a good partner and he said no, every man is annoying, and I'll have to deal with it if I want to get married.
I guess I'm not sure what to think. He's very insightful 99% of the time and I trust his judgment, even if it can be brutally honest at times
What did your boyfriend do that was annoying?
I decided to cook him a really nice, elaborate dinner and he barely said two words to me as he saw I was cooking it. Just walked past me to grab a beer, then walked to the TV, plopped down and turned it on.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:It’s the emotional differences that vary person to person. Hell, children are perpetually annoying and I would literally give my life for mine. That sacrificial attitude is much more common with women than men. Maybe that is what your bestie is alluding to.
That might be it. That and being aware of/empathetic to other people's feelings. Basically I was venting about my current boyfriend and how annoyed I was by something he did and he said every single man is annoying and I'll have to get used to it. I said I thought there must be men out there who aren't annoying and who will make a good partner and he said no, every man is annoying, and I'll have to deal with it if I want to get married.
I guess I'm not sure what to think. He's very insightful 99% of the time and I trust his judgment, even if it can be brutally honest at times
What did your boyfriend do that was annoying?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:It’s the emotional differences that vary person to person. Hell, children are perpetually annoying and I would literally give my life for mine. That sacrificial attitude is much more common with women than men. Maybe that is what your bestie is alluding to.
That might be it. That and being aware of/empathetic to other people's feelings. Basically I was venting about my current boyfriend and how annoyed I was by something he did and he said every single man is annoying and I'll have to get used to it. I said I thought there must be men out there who aren't annoying and who will make a good partner and he said no, every man is annoying, and I'll have to deal with it if I want to get married.
I guess I'm not sure what to think. He's very insightful 99% of the time and I trust his judgment, even if it can be brutally honest at times