Just today, I was out running errands, sitting at a red light when I saw an old cemetery next to a church. I laughed out loud when I remembered my then 3 year old exclaimed, “ Look Mommy, a gravy yard!” I miss their little voices.

I do miss that peel of laughter my kids used to have when they were that age. And the bedtime stories - they are fully capable readers now at 12 and 13.

And their company. They used to be in the same room or the room next to me all the time, playing or whatever. Now they're in their own rooms and I might not see either of them for HOURS and then they might be in a bad mood and saying "fxxk" too much!

And strangely I miss the sight of hard plastic toys scattered on the floor. Though I don't know why because I used to hate the sight of them and the endless picking up.

Anonymous wrote:There is a point at which they don't crawl up and sit inth your lap anymore, or reach out and grab your hand with their little one when you are walking. I miss those things; you never know when it's happening that it's the last time, so savor them all.

This hit me in the nostalgic gut. I loved feeling the automatic hand reaching for mine.

I miss being needed 24/7 knowing that they depend on me for everything in their lives. And I miss the cuddling which is how they thanked me. Happily I now have grandchildren that age and I get plenty of cuddling.

Thanks, OP. My boys are 3 and 2 months and I really needed this thread.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, you may want to ask Jeff whether this should move to a different forum?

Op here. I don’t think so. This forum used to be called “over 50”. I guess I was looking for responses from people who had already raised their kids, so I could see what people look back on.

I agree it seems weird in the eldercare/mid-life forum but the responses have been exactly what I was looking for

People in the parenting forums can be so nasty. I’m a frequent OP over there too but I am not really looking for advice on nap schedules, day care, how to make my husband help, etc.

I’m looking for perspective, I guess.

I'm so glad! When our kids were little, neighbors with older/grown kids would say "If there's ever anything we can do, even if you just need a break, let us know" and I thought they were just saying that to be neighborly. Now that my kids are older, I realize they probably meant it. I know I would be happy (in normal times) to take someone's kids to the park what the parents make dinner or do some home repair or just flop down with a cup of coffee and some reality TV.

But until then, reassurance of internet strangers will do.

I was young and able bodied. Now I am in above 50 and the sweet kids have grown up and looking after me. Growing old sucks!

The cute clothes. My kids had strong opinions about clothes from an early age so I never really had full control over what they wore, but there are a lot of cute clothes that only toddlers wear.

I miss the little voices and the chubby cheeks. There is just a sweetness to their little faces.

I don't know that I ever *loved* the toddler years. They are hard. They are physically exhausting. I do love preschoolers though. Their excitement over little things. The way they are starting to know.how to carry on a conversation but aren't always there yet. The way very ordinary things can seem so, so silly and elicit lots of giggling.

There is a point at which they don't crawl up and sit inth your lap anymore, or reach out and grab your hand with their little one when you are walking. I miss those things; you never know when it's happening that it's the last time, so savor them all.

Snuggles, naps, reading aloud, little chubby hands eating peas and corn with their fingers, silly chasing games, belly laughs, the awe of finding worms and bugs in the yard, bathtime, sitting on the floor and building things with their blocks and big fat duplos, going on a walk with them in the stroller, tricycle, bed time promptly at 8pm worn out and smelling good after that bath.

The quiet and glass of wine at 8:30, where I’m happy but exhausted.

My children's inability to roll their eyes!

Lol

Anonymous wrote:Going for walks, pushing them on the swings at the park, reading to them every night, picking out their clothes.

Yeah! I mean, I agree with the snuggles and the love and innocence and all that, but this was one complete frivolity that was really fun. There are certain things that only little toddlers can wear that are so cute -- overalls and shortalls and rompers and things with ruffly butts. I had a lot of fun dressing my kids, not in fussy dressy clothes, but in fun everyday clothes that I thought were cute, like little dolls. And they were too young to have an opinion or care. Now they are older and definitely have ideas about clothes that differ from mine -- a lot more glitter or a lot more mixing of patterns and colors than I would necessarily deem stylish.

Anonymous wrote:OP, you may want to ask Jeff whether this should move to a different forum?

Op here. I don’t think so. This forum used to be called “over 50”. I guess I was looking for responses from people who had already raised their kids, so I could see what people look back on.

I agree it seems weird in the eldercare/mid-life forum but the responses have been exactly what I was looking for

People in the parenting forums can be so nasty. I’m a frequent OP over there too but I am not really looking for advice on nap schedules, day care, how to make my husband help, etc.

I’m looking for perspective, I guess.

OP, you may want to ask Jeff whether this should move to a different forum?

I miss how little they were. So little and innocent, so loving, so easily pleased. Even though it doesn’t seem like it. I see the big kid emerging in my 6 year old and I was sniffling over toddler pictures of her the other night.