Anonymous wrote:OP, I think the entire premise of your post is just another way for women to bash other women. I wish we could do a better job of accepting one another, even those who approach life differently than ourselves.

This feels like a "why you gotta be so intolerant of people who say 'All lives matter'?" response.

Not the OP, but I feel as though this place is booby trapped (like so much of American society, so I'm not surprised, just bummed). Some who comes here asking how to find a beginner yoga class or which rower to buy or what exercises are easier on the knees is going to get a whole lot of weight loss commentary in addition to whatever actual requested advice they get. It's a drag.

Anonymous wrote:Reddit xxfitness

That forum is more diverse than this one, but there are plenty of disordered women on there. It’s definitely more fitness and strength-focused than DCUM, at least.

OP, I’ve also finally settled into the intuitive eating thing and generally don’t worry about my size. I’m healthy and fit; people ask if I CrossFit or swim (no and yes, but not fast). I love intense workouts, though, and get be obsessive about them, but it’s from a place of genuine love. My parents were obsessed with dieting and weight and I promised myself I wouldn’t model the same for my kids. They see me workout daily, but they also see me enjoy ice cream, so that feels like a good balance.

I mean, lately at home or the bike trail. But I found my ride or die crew in roller derby.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'd seriously like to know. Am I the only person who doesn't weigh myself, goes for runs, also eats ice cream and cake, doesn't count carbs, is 40+, likes to feel strong, doesn't mind sweating, eats kale and lentils but also enjoys just eating brioche straight from the bag sometimes without starving myself the next 2 days as punishment?

I feel so alone in this on DCUM. Anyone?

Bueller?

Just curious...how strong are you?

Obviously, it's all relative. I think it means continually physically challenging and pushing yourself to do more.

But I felt strong today doing 30 minutes on the stairmaster, no hands or elbows - in fact I had dumbbells and used them for intervals for some extra work. The guy next to me was eliminating like 2/3 of his body weight by totally leaning (looked more like weird hugging) the machine like it's mostly some upper body thing exercise that's just super bad for your back.

What a judgy and disordered op we have here! Goes to gym to judge other people!

Anonymous wrote:OP, I think the entire premise of your post is just another way for women to bash other women. I wish we could do a better job of accepting one another, even those who approach life differently than ourselves.

Agreed. The 15:50 post in particular. OP, ask yourself, if you’re in such a good place with food and fitness after your recovery, why do you need to post negativity about other women? There’s literally hundreds of other fitness sites that are a google search away, if this forum sometimes veers too close to pro-ana (which I agree it does). If I don’t like the direction of a thread, I see myself out. Over the line, dangerous, posts can be reported.

I think lots of women do have complicated relationships with food and body image but I also think a lot of women in middle age or post-child-bearing start to react to body changes. Some of these manifestations are normal and healthy and others are not.

Of my core group of 5 friends I can say for sure one is incredibly disordered and suffers from a lot of self-hate and obsession. Another appears very healthy, if thin, and watches what she eats and seems content. Two are heavier and acknowledge that, but it doesn't seem to fundamentally change their self worth and they deal with it in their own ways like exercise, frankness, and one has begun to focus a lot on her face and hair (treatments, etc...). I believe myself to be normal with regard to food, exercise, body image and all that stuff. I think we're a pretty good sample of 40-ish upper middle class womanhood - 20% nuts, 40% past prime, 40% hanging in there just fine. We hang out at work and at home.

I am disordered in so many ways if I was also disorderd in the way I eat I would be a total mess... I suspect we are exactly the same.

Anonymous wrote:OP, I think the entire premise of your post is just another way for women to bash other women. I wish we could do a better job of accepting one another, even those who approach life differently than ourselves.

And if OP were non-disordered, she would know that.