0 to 1 because everything was our "first time" as first time parents with so many unknowns and uncertainties.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:0 to 1

+1.

+100

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I went from 1 to 3 (twins). It was ROUGH!

I was 0 to 3 with triplets. No transition was hard after that.

How many kids do you have????

I agree with PP. I have 4 kids & agree that going from 2 to 3 was the toughest transition.

I have 4 kids. The hardest transition for me was 2 to 3. Suddenly, you and your spouse are outnumbered. You go from playing man-to-man to zone defense.

I have three, (5, 3, 1).

I will be the outlier here and say 1-2 was the hardest for me. When we had our first we were living in a townhouse in Alexandria and we really didn't change much, we just took our baby places. She made appearances at happy hours and offices. We still had a lot of expendable income so we could get babysitters. She was like a happy little accessory.

1-2 we had moved to a new city and #1 had a really hard time with #2, she did not like him and was very jealous. And that was the point where our lives really started to revolve around the kids and their schedules. It was definitely the point where I felt like I really became like 'mom' organizing the house and structure.

I think for my husband (who is a very active and engaged husband who does a LOT and who I love very much!) it was 2-3 because he had to fully lock into dad mode in the same way. And we moved to the suburbs and the pandemic hit so overall hard.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:1 to 2

But I think have three kids is way harder than having two. The transition to three was easy, actually having them, less so.

I totally agree with this BUT I spend a lot of time with my kids in the summer by myself. So going from 1 to 2 felt difficult but going from 2 to 3 wasn't such a big deal because I was already outnumbered. However, actually having 3 kids seems like mathematically much more work than 2--it doesn't feel like 3 times the laundry, it feels like 10 times the laundry, 10 times louder, 10 times more coordination of pick up/drop off/doctors appointments, etc. But I wouldn't trade it for anything, my third balances out my older two and is the sweetest and still gives me cuddles!!

PP you're quoting, and yes I agree with you that I wouldn't trade it for anything.

I do think that the issue around being outnumbered and solo parenting 2 vs. 3 is part of it. Taking three kids out on your own--or even just having them at home on your own--is such a different ballgame than with two kids. I'm pretty capable of doing it, but it was a learning curve. Whenever I hear parents who feel overwhelmed with two say they're considering a third, I want to scream. If you're already overwhelmed, DON'T have another kid.

This is my sister and her husband. Have two, pregnant with third, already discussing number 4. But totally exhausted and overwhelmed and constantly complaining about how there isn’t enough anything (time, money, sleep, space in the house.) I do not understand, but my opinion is most definitely not welcome.

Why are people wedded to a certain number of children even after they have one or two realize how tough it is.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:1 to 2

But I think have three kids is way harder than having two. The transition to three was easy, actually having them, less so.

I totally agree with this BUT I spend a lot of time with my kids in the summer by myself. So going from 1 to 2 felt difficult but going from 2 to 3 wasn't such a big deal because I was already outnumbered. However, actually having 3 kids seems like mathematically much more work than 2--it doesn't feel like 3 times the laundry, it feels like 10 times the laundry, 10 times louder, 10 times more coordination of pick up/drop off/doctors appointments, etc. But I wouldn't trade it for anything, my third balances out my older two and is the sweetest and still gives me cuddles!!

PP you're quoting, and yes I agree with you that I wouldn't trade it for anything.

I do think that the issue around being outnumbered and solo parenting 2 vs. 3 is part of it. Taking three kids out on your own--or even just having them at home on your own--is such a different ballgame than with two kids. I'm pretty capable of doing it, but it was a learning curve. Whenever I hear parents who feel overwhelmed with two say they're considering a third, I want to scream. If you're already overwhelmed, DON'T have another kid.

This is my sister and her husband. Have two, pregnant with third, already discussing number 4. But totally exhausted and overwhelmed and constantly complaining about how there isn’t enough anything (time, money, sleep, space in the house.) I do not understand, but my opinion is most definitely not welcome.