I graduated high school in '93.

For college my parents paid tuition (public, slightly over $1000/semester) and $300 towards living expenses--this was in an area where a 2 bedroom/1 bath apartment in a sketchy area was about $650/month, not including utilities--so I had to cover a portion of rent, utilities, food, transportation (was a few miles from campus), books, and things like toiletries and clothing.
I worked full time to cover that, while going to school full time.

Help with grad school was out of the question. No way were they paying for that.

Father was a family practice physician and mother was a SAHM.

2 kids in college:

They are covered under our medical insurance (it's no additional cost to us through my Dh's work, so that's a given.)

We pay for tuition

We pay for the dorm room freshman year, and apartment rent after that--but that means we get a say in which apartment/living situation they choose. In their college town, it is common that most apartment complexes include utilities in the rent.

We pay for a meal plan freshman year, and a "food allowance" for the remaining years. The "food allowance" depends on how much they spend on the apartment--we will pay up to $1000 total for apartment (including utilities) and food. So the older child picked an apartment that is $620/month, so he will get $380/month food allowance. That also has to cover things like toothpaste, toilet paper, etc. but we will start him with a good stockpile at the beginning of the year--especially in light of Covid, we don't want him skimping on hand soap! Same with his roommates--if any of them are having trouble affording basic handsoap, we will GLADLY help out!

Any extra's like going out, meals beyond the food allowance, etc. need to be covered themselves.

Anonymous wrote:My parents paid 1/3 of official college bills (so nothing when I moved off-campus) and nothing after. They thought it would build character. It built something, alright - the inability to take non-paying internships related to my field because I had to work, and a mound of debt (even at a state school) that I still have to this day. It also instilled in me the (bad) decision to go to a lower ranked/more affordable graduate program when I would have been much better paid had attended the higher ranked/more expensive programs. Thanks, parents. I will not make the same mistakes with my children.

Precisely how do you know you'd make a lot more money right now and the extra debt would have been worth it? Are you talking about an MBA? Did you get stuck in a certain region? Did you even get into higher ranked programs?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My parents paid 1/3 of official college bills (so nothing when I moved off-campus) and nothing after. They thought it would build character. It built something, alright - the inability to take non-paying internships related to my field because I had to work, and a mound of debt (even at a state school) that I still have to this day. It also instilled in me the (bad) decision to go to a lower ranked/more affordable graduate program when I would have been much better paid had attended the higher ranked/more expensive programs. Thanks, parents. I will not make the same mistakes with my children.

Bitterness is bad. Get over yourself. They owed you nothing for college.

Not PP, but speak for yourself. We very much believe we owe our children a debt-free college education. We have saved for two decades to make that happen for them.

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Not to be mean, but you have to save four decades in order to provide your children with a debt-free collection education. You do know that most SLACs are approaching 80K a year (including everything)? and some kids take 5 to 6 years to graduate? That's in AFTER-TAX dollars. I'm glad you are so *smart* but we too set up trusts (pre 529s) at birth for both of our kids. Then the 2007 market hit the accounts badly. Then both kids turned out to have SN so we started draining the accounts to pay for tutors and special programs and still, to this day, we are supporting three parents. And even after all the unexpected life experiences that happen, you can afford 4 years x 80K, you STILL should apply under FAFSA so your child takes out the $5500 + loans every year just so they have some skin in the game. Every single year.

Paid for everything undergrad. She is going to grad school and we are paying for cell phone, car insurance and car repairs. She is in her own for everything else.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My parents paid 1/3 of official college bills (so nothing when I moved off-campus) and nothing after. They thought it would build character. It built something, alright - the inability to take non-paying internships related to my field because I had to work, and a mound of debt (even at a state school) that I still have to this day. It also instilled in me the (bad) decision to go to a lower ranked/more affordable graduate program when I would have been much better paid had attended the higher ranked/more expensive programs. Thanks, parents. I will not make the same mistakes with my children.

Bitterness is bad. Get over yourself. They owed you nothing for college.

Not PP but GFY. Having Parents who foot the bill for college and grad school provides an enormous advantage and you know it.

Of course it does. And it's a wonderful gift if you can swing it. The overwhelming majority of people in this country cannot. I know mine could not but they paid about 20k and I paid about 20k and then got a half scholarship. I consider myself lucky my parents could do it at all. Yes. I started life behind kids who come from more money, I had to lifeguardand wait tables instead of interning (which honestly most interns learn NOTHING they do crap grunt projects) but anger isn't going to make my hustle better.

My parents paid for college (with the help of my grandparents- I am very lucky!), but I was on my own for graduate school tuition and all living expenses (I had medical expenses come up in grad school that weren't covered under my school's health plan and my parents said that they would not help with those either; they weren't being jerks, they really needed to focus on saving for retirement and I respected their position). Ultimately, this made me take a lot of responsibility in grad school (prior to grad school I'd worked at nonprofits and barely made enough to survive). I went to grad school intending to work at a nonprofit or in government after I finished, but because I took out loans I ended up doing a U-turn my first year and got a very selective internship that really launched me into a career where I make more money than I ever could have imagined.

Although there were (and still are) times that I was really resentful of peers' whose parents paid for everything (I could have done a lot with the $120K that I spent on the cost of tuition, living expenses, and interest paying back the loans!), I actually feel that the responsibility that I felt to pay back the loans made me take that part of my education more seriously. I knew that I needed to hustle and I did. I went to an ivy in college and got good grades, but also kind of had my head in the clouds. Money really wasn't something that I stressed about or needed to think about (I wanted to "do good" and I honestly didn't care if that meant that I was going to make $40K my entire life). In that sense, the responsibility of needing to pay for grad school ended up really changing the trajectory of my career and probably my life. My husband's family was completely opposite everyone had college and grad school paid for and everyone got a car after completing grad school. I do think that people should spend their money however they want, but it seemed silly to me to give everyone a car at the end of grad school as a "prize" for finishing. Shouldn't the prize be getting your post-graduate education and expenses paid for when you're almost 30?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My parents paid 1/3 of official college bills (so nothing when I moved off-campus) and nothing after. They thought it would build character. It built something, alright - the inability to take non-paying internships related to my field because I had to work, and a mound of debt (even at a state school) that I still have to this day. It also instilled in me the (bad) decision to go to a lower ranked/more affordable graduate program when I would have been much better paid had attended the higher ranked/more expensive programs. Thanks, parents. I will not make the same mistakes with my children.

Bitterness is bad. Get over yourself. They owed you nothing for college.

Not PP, but speak for yourself. We very much believe we owe our children a debt-free college education. We have saved for two decades to make that happen for them.

My parents took out a PLUS loan for about 15K when I was in college and paid for plane tickets home -- I grew up in Alaska so those could be pricey.

For grad school, nada except an annual plane ticket home for the holidays. My grad school was a fully-funded PhD program with a stipend which didn't come close to covering living expenses, but I worked an extra job to cover the gaps.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My parents paid 1/3 of official college bills (so nothing when I moved off-campus) and nothing after. They thought it would build character. It built something, alright - the inability to take non-paying internships related to my field because I had to work, and a mound of debt (even at a state school) that I still have to this day. It also instilled in me the (bad) decision to go to a lower ranked/more affordable graduate program when I would have been much better paid had attended the higher ranked/more expensive programs. Thanks, parents. I will not make the same mistakes with my children.

Bitterness is bad. Get over yourself. They owed you nothing for college.

Sounds like the person probably made a bad choice of major. Any major worth paying for is going to have internships that pay.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My parents paid 1/3 of official college bills (so nothing when I moved off-campus) and nothing after. They thought it would build character. It built something, alright - the inability to take non-paying internships related to my field because I had to work, and a mound of debt (even at a state school) that I still have to this day. It also instilled in me the (bad) decision to go to a lower ranked/more affordable graduate program when I would have been much better paid had attended the higher ranked/more expensive programs. Thanks, parents. I will not make the same mistakes with my children.

Bitterness is bad. Get over yourself. They owed you nothing for college.

Not PP but GFY. Having Parents who foot the bill for college and grad school provides an enormous advantage and you know it.

My dad paid for my tuition for dental school. I was on my own for living expenses, so I still applied for scholarships, did decently academically, etc. I think over the four years I probably got about 35k in scholarships for living expenses.

After I graduated, he let me pay the loan for a year (I had about 70k from 4 years, so it was still a hefty monthly at 6.8% interest). After a year he paid off all of the rest. It was AWESOME and has really influenced my life, allowing me to work part time as I had kids, etc.

Anonymous wrote:My parents paid 1/3 of official college bills (so nothing when I moved off-campus) and nothing after. They thought it would build character. It built something, alright - the inability to take non-paying internships related to my field because I had to work, and a mound of debt (even at a state school) that I still have to this day. It also instilled in me the (bad) decision to go to a lower ranked/more affordable graduate program when I would have been much better paid had attended the higher ranked/more expensive programs. Thanks, parents. I will not make the same mistakes with my children.

Bitterness is bad. Get over yourself. They owed you nothing for college.

everything except beer money

Anonymous wrote:School and living expenses

Fully paid for college. Post graduate, you're on your own.