Anonymous wrote:They’re nuts.
I agree with the PP about skipping it altogether rather than going but skipping the main event.

In my family, weddings have been postponed. But we care about everyone’s health.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I appreciate the responses, and will carefully consider whether to attend at all. I thought that I would be conveying support by showing up for some of the wedding-related events. I love and miss my family -- we all live in different parts of the country -- so I was looking forward to seeing them, even if it did not include the wedding ceremony and reception.

My parents said right away that they would travel to the event, attend the ceremony, but not the reception. I admire that they made a decision that works for them and figured I would do the same.

I was incredibly judgemental in my post, but my intention was never to convey that to the bride and groom. I was just looking for a reality check from the DCUM community.

It's okay to go only to the ceremony and skip the reception, especially if you're old. Skipping the ceremony and attending only the reception is less okay, but people don't usually notice if you aren't at the ceremony. But it's really not okay to skip the ceremony AND reception and attend only minor events like thee rehearsal dinner or brunch. That's making it about you, not supporting or celebrating with the couple.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't get any of your rationale, at all, for attending "smaller events" that will likely have food, vs. the church ceremony.

Wear a mask and sit in the corner, well away from others, if you must. But if you attend anything, attend the ceremony.

Or don't go, at all, which is also fine.

RSVP cards have "Decline with Regrets" boxes for a reason. Check that box, send a gift, "Like" all the pictures posted on Facebook and such. Done.

Life is not actually hard for those of us mature enough to own our choices and live our choices.

If people get mad or upset...yes, and? That's their problem. Not my problem. I'm going to keep my family as safe as I can during a pandemic, no matter what Aunt Jan thinks or says.

The rationale is that 1) the smaller events are outside and involve fewer people, 2) I would still get the chance to see my family and "celebrate" the couple.

If your main goal is a family reunion, wait until the next family reunion.

If your goal is to celebrate this couple getting married, attend the marriage ceremony.

expecting everyone

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't get any of your rationale, at all, for attending "smaller events" that will likely have food, vs. the church ceremony.

Wear a mask and sit in the corner, well away from others, if you must. But if you attend anything, attend the ceremony.

Or don't go, at all, which is also fine.

RSVP cards have "Decline with Regrets" boxes for a reason. Check that box, send a gift, "Like" all the pictures posted on Facebook and such. Done.

Life is not actually hard for those of us mature enough to own our choices and live our choices.

If people get mad or upset...yes, and? That's their problem. Not my problem. I'm going to keep my family as safe as I can during a pandemic, no matter what Aunt Jan thinks or says.

The rationale is that 1) the smaller events are outside and involve fewer people, 2) I would still get the chance to see my family and "celebrate" the couple.

Anonymous wrote:I don't get any of your rationale, at all, for attending "smaller events" that will likely have food, vs. the church ceremony.

Wear a mask and sit in the corner, well away from others, if you must. But if you attend anything, attend the ceremony.

Or don't go, at all, which is also fine.

RSVP cards have "Decline with Regrets" boxes for a reason. Check that box, send a gift, "Like" all the pictures posted on Facebook and such. Done.

Life is not actually hard for those of us mature enough to own our choices and live our choices.

If people get mad or upset...yes, and? That's their problem. Not my problem. I'm going to keep my family as safe as I can during a pandemic, no matter what Aunt Jan thinks or says.

Anonymous wrote:I don't get any of your rationale, at all, for attending "smaller events" that will likely have food, vs. the church ceremony.

Wear a mask and sit in the corner, well away from others, if you must. But if you attend anything, attend the ceremony.

Or don't go, at all, which is also fine.

RSVP cards have "Decline with Regrets" boxes for a reason. Check that box, send a gift, "Like" all the pictures posted on Facebook and such. Done.

Life is not actually hard for those of us mature enough to own our choices and live our choices.

If people get mad or upset...yes, and? That's their problem. Not my problem. I'm going to keep my family as safe as I can during a pandemic, no matter what Aunt Jan thinks or says.

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I appreciate the responses, and will carefully consider whether to attend at all. I thought that I would be conveying support by showing up for some of the wedding-related events. I love and miss my family -- we all live in different parts of the country -- so I was looking forward to seeing them, even if it did not include the wedding ceremony and reception.

My parents said right away that they would travel to the event, attend the ceremony, but not the reception. I admire that they made a decision that works for them and figured I would do the same.

I was incredibly judgemental in my post, but my intention was never to convey that to the bride and groom. I was just looking for a reality check from the DCUM community.