Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No. I didn't say it was offensive to post a single picture. I don't post pictures of my kids because I don't know if they would want them posted as adults and there is no way to erase things online. When they are older, they can post all they want. I do have pictures of myself, and adult friends and family, posted with their permission. But this is a completely separate issue. The only commonality is that I am perhaps analyzing more deeply the consequences of posting things than you might be (but that may not be true, it could be that you are just reaching different conclusions instead of thoughtlessly going about social media activity). Our risk preferences, personalities, values, cultural norms are very different.

Be careful about jumping to conclusions and creating a narrative that suits you. It tends to be alienating.

Do you take everything others say and do as personally as you seem to think everyone takes what you say and do? I don't understand how you can live by analyzing every single decision you make based on how it will affect other people, because there is no way you will (1) ever know how everyone else feels and (2) be able to please everyone unless you never speak in any way, which includes the voice you use when you purchase a house, buy a car, choose which clothes to wear, etc. I had a friend comment once on how a Facebook post of mine provided the ray of sunshine she needed to help brighten the tough day she was having (which I knew nothing about at the time). I don't post often on social media, by the way, and I do tend to find it somewhat toxic and I have removed many people who I no longer desire to follow, but I had no idea that she was experiencing something hard that day. It's also possible that my post simultaneously upset a different friend for some other reason. I suppose you could argue that the grief of one person could not possibly be outweighed by the happiness of another, but my point is that there is no way I would have known that either thing would happen. I happen to have several close friends who have dealt with pregnancy loss, the death of a child, and infertility. But that doesn't mean that they do not find joy in other people's posts of their children. So I think for you to make the assumptions that you do (i.e. jumping to conclusions and creating a narrative that suits you), you are actually being really narrow-minded, despite your efforts to sound so much better than everyone who posts on social media.

Anonymous wrote:No. I didn't say it was offensive to post a single picture. I don't post pictures of my kids because I don't know if they would want them posted as adults and there is no way to erase things online. When they are older, they can post all they want. I do have pictures of myself, and adult friends and family, posted with their permission. But this is a completely separate issue. The only commonality is that I am perhaps analyzing more deeply the consequences of posting things than you might be (but that may not be true, it could be that you are just reaching different conclusions instead of thoughtlessly going about social media activity). Our risk preferences, personalities, values, cultural norms are very different.

Be careful about jumping to conclusions and creating a narrative that suits you. It tends to be alienating.

Anonymous wrote:If you have to question it, don't do it.

Anonymous wrote:My 2 year old learned how to ride a pedal bike!

Is posting a video of that to FB annoying?

I feel like it’s braggy because he’s so young. And also annoying bcs no one really cares.

Maybe I answered my own question.

Anonymous wrote:No. I didn't say it was offensive to post a single picture. I don't post pictures of my kids because I don't know if they would want them posted as adults and there is no way to erase things online. When they are older, they can post all they want. I do have pictures of myself, and adult friends and family, posted with their permission. But this is a completely separate issue. The only commonality is that I am perhaps analyzing more deeply the consequences of posting things than you might be (but that may not be true, it could be that you are just reaching different conclusions instead of thoughtlessly going about social media activity). Our risk preferences, personalities, values, cultural norms are very different.

Be careful about jumping to conclusions and creating a narrative that suits you. It tends to be alienating.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn't. Parents can be so insecure about milestones and some may have kids who are quite a bit behind for various reasons. If hate to make them feel less than even for a second.

But you should definitely send the video to all the grandparents, aunts and uncles!

NP. I wouldn’t intentionally hurt someone’s feelings but this is over the top. I mean, I tend to think social media is stupid and rarely post anything or react to things but I don’t live my life in fear of insulting someone else. How can you?

I don't live in fear, I just try to put myself in the shoes of some of my Facebook contacts. I have very good friends who have dealt with infertility and others who are disabled or have disabled kids, and one whose kid is waiting for a lung transplant. That's just the ones I know about. And I know for a fact this would upset some of them, because they have confided in me. Sure you have every right to post what you want. I just wouldn't. I would send it to family members or friends I knew would be happy to see it.

Curious, what do you post?

Are you never posting anything about your children at all because that could upset an infertile friend?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn't. Parents can be so insecure about milestones and some may have kids who are quite a bit behind for various reasons. If hate to make them feel less than even for a second.

But you should definitely send the video to all the grandparents, aunts and uncles!

NP. I wouldn’t intentionally hurt someone’s feelings but this is over the top. I mean, I tend to think social media is stupid and rarely post anything or react to things but I don’t live my life in fear of insulting someone else. How can you?

I don't live in fear, I just try to put myself in the shoes of some of my Facebook contacts. I have very good friends who have dealt with infertility and others who are disabled or have disabled kids, and one whose kid is waiting for a lung transplant. That's just the ones I know about. And I know for a fact this would upset some of them, because they have confided in me. Sure you have every right to post what you want. I just wouldn't. I would send it to family members or friends I knew would be happy to see it.

You have friends struggling with infertility - does that mean you have never posted a picture of your children on Facebook?

Actually in my case yes, though those friends have met and love my kids in person so the fact I don't post pictures of them at all is not related to the topic at hand. Why do you care so much about my perspectives? OP wanted opinions and that is mine. You're allowed to have a different one.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn't. Parents can be so insecure about milestones and some may have kids who are quite a bit behind for various reasons. If hate to make them feel less than even for a second.

But you should definitely send the video to all the grandparents, aunts and uncles!

NP. I wouldn’t intentionally hurt someone’s feelings but this is over the top. I mean, I tend to think social media is stupid and rarely post anything or react to things but I don’t live my life in fear of insulting someone else. How can you?

I don't live in fear, I just try to put myself in the shoes of some of my Facebook contacts. I have very good friends who have dealt with infertility and others who are disabled or have disabled kids, and one whose kid is waiting for a lung transplant. That's just the ones I know about. And I know for a fact this would upset some of them, because they have confided in me. Sure you have every right to post what you want. I just wouldn't. I would send it to family members or friends I knew would be happy to see it.

You have friends struggling with infertility - does that mean you have never posted a picture of your children on Facebook?

Anonymous wrote:Definitely no commentary. I wouldn't post to any moms groups. Is the video actually that cute or is the point really "my kid is riding a bike at 2!"

I mean honestly, why do you need to post your kid's milestones on facebook... that is the real question. Why don't you just send a video to your relatives/close friends?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn't. Parents can be so insecure about milestones and some may have kids who are quite a bit behind for various reasons. If hate to make them feel less than even for a second.

But you should definitely send the video to all the grandparents, aunts and uncles!

NP. I wouldn’t intentionally hurt someone’s feelings but this is over the top. I mean, I tend to think social media is stupid and rarely post anything or react to things but I don’t live my life in fear of insulting someone else. How can you?

I don't live in fear, I just try to put myself in the shoes of some of my Facebook contacts. I have very good friends who have dealt with infertility and others who are disabled or have disabled kids, and one whose kid is waiting for a lung transplant. That's just the ones I know about. And I know for a fact this would upset some of them, because they have confided in me. Sure you have every right to post what you want. I just wouldn't. I would send it to family members or friends I knew would be happy to see it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn't. Parents can be so insecure about milestones and some may have kids who are quite a bit behind for various reasons. If hate to make them feel less than even for a second.

But you should definitely send the video to all the grandparents, aunts and uncles!

NP. I wouldn’t intentionally hurt someone’s feelings but this is over the top. I mean, I tend to think social media is stupid and rarely post anything or react to things but I don’t live my life in fear of insulting someone else. How can you?

I don't live in fear, I just try to put myself in the shoes of some of my Facebook contacts. I have very good friends who have dealt with infertility and others who are disabled or have disabled kids, and one whose kid is waiting for a lung transplant. That's just the ones I know about. And I know for a fact this would upset some of them, because they have confided in me. Sure you have every right to post what you want. I just wouldn't. I would send it to family members or friends I knew would be happy to see it.