In many cases, not disclosing could be a crime. By deliberating without information about a sexually transmitted disease, the other person’s consent could be deemed void because HAD that person known OP had an STD he/she would not have consented. It is a form of sexual assault. People have been prosecuted (and sued) for this.

I got cold sores from kissing someone. She didn't disclose. The initial outbreak really sucked, like a terrible flu for a week and then bad sores on my lips. Had 1-2 small outbreaks in the couple months that followed. So it's a big deal in the moment, and I would have avoided kissing her if I knew. But in the grand scheme of life, it's a minor hiccup and interesting to see that most people get it.

I would disclose.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s pretty disgusting that you guys are all NBD about mouth cold sores. Again, some of us have never had one in our lives and so yeah, we care.

But not having cold sores is not the same as not having the virus, and statistics suggest you do have it.

Statistics suggest I *may* have it. Doesn’t mean I’m not going to think it’s no big deal if someone I’m dating gets cold sores and doesn’t mention it.

Anonymous wrote:It’s pretty disgusting that you guys are all NBD about mouth cold sores. Again, some of us have never had one in our lives and so yeah, we care.

But not having cold sores is not the same as not having the virus, and statistics suggest you do have it.

I have cold sores and rarely get outbreaks. I don't disclose as soon as I start dating someone ... but as soon as I feel an outbreak coming -- or if I'm going through something stressful, which can cause an outbreak -- I disclose and avoid contact from first onset of symptoms (well before I can see it) until well after it's healed completely. I got mine from an Aunt when I was a young child -- I used to get them a lot more often when I was younger ...

Obviously don’t go down on anyone if you have a cold sore or any tingling.

Anonymous wrote:YES. You must. As someone who contracted HSV 1 from an asymptomatic boyfriend from oral sex, you must disclose this. It’s herpes. Let’s kill the stigma.

Me too

Interesting discussion. How often have people disclosed cold sores to you? For me, the answer is never, and I would guess I have kissed 50 women in my life. Considering at least 25-40 of them have HSV1, do most people have it and not know or do they know and not see it as disclose-worthy?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes. I’d be furious if someone didn’t disclose this to me, and if I found out later on I’d immediately dump them for being dishonest.

+ 1

Ok big deal. By that time you probably already have the STD. Maybe know them well, and both get tested BEFORE you go further in the relationship.

Many of you are naive. Many people won't disclose a STD because they know most won't sleep with them. I wouldn't, why would I want to put my health at risk.

If you want to be safe get a clean bill of health before you sleep with the person. And know them well by that time. It's amazing, many people don't value their most important asset.

Anonymous wrote:I don't have it and have never had a cold sore and would be furious if you knew you had a contagious issue and didn't say something.

Going around and intentionally infecting others is just a weird thing to think it is okay.

If you search this site you’ll see it discussed frequently. And there are many posters who always say NBD don’t disclose. It’s so bizarre. I’ve never understood that viewpoint.

Anonymous wrote:Yes. I’d be furious if someone didn’t disclose this to me, and if I found out later on I’d immediately dump them for being dishonest.

+ 1

I don't have it and have never had a cold sore and would be furious if you knew you had a contagious issue and didn't say something.

Going around and intentionally infecting others is just a weird thing to think it is okay.

Anonymous wrote:We are talking MOUTH cold sores for those stats listed above. Yes...I know it can transfer but that is not the statitic we are discussing

The question we’re discussing is to disclose and the answer is yes.

If you get it in your eye you can go blind. It can cause blindness and death in newborns. Disclose it, OP. I'm disgusted this is even a question for you. Maybe your new GF won't disclose her HIV status.