Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Aww I love this thread. I’m very happily married 8 years now, three kids. I had been friends with my DH for years; we were dating other people (I never had a serious boyfriend). I found him extremely attractive even though he isn’t conventionally so. He was the first to say I love you, and proposed six months after being together. I still love being around him and he’s my favorite person in the world. Even though he’s irritating me while we are confined to proverbial house arrest under Covid rules, we still had great sex last night and I intend to cash in my free back scratches he still owes me tonight while we Netflix and chill.

Noticing that couples, myself included where you were friends for a while then dated seem to work out better. Maybe it's because you don't have the initial pressure of a dating relationship or you have already seen each other in different situations?

One of the happiest couples I know were friends for a few years, dated other people and would talk about what was going on, and then realized they were meant for each other.

I know many happy couples in real who started off dating, I also know many that started off as friends who are miserable.

What I'm noticing is there seems to be a balance in the relationship one person isn't doing everything. Also a general respect for the other person being who they are and with the exception of 1 a healthy sex life.

Anonymous wrote:Aww I love this thread. I’m very happily married 8 years now, three kids. I had been friends with my DH for years; we were dating other people (I never had a serious boyfriend). I found him extremely attractive even though he isn’t conventionally so. He was the first to say I love you, and proposed six months after being together. I still love being around him and he’s my favorite person in the world. Even though he’s irritating me while we are confined to proverbial house arrest under Covid rules, we still had great sex last night and I intend to cash in my free back scratches he still owes me tonight while we Netflix and chill.

Noticing that couples, myself included where you were friends for a while then dated seem to work out better. Maybe it's because you don't have the initial pressure of a dating relationship or you have already seen each other in different situations?

One of the happiest couples I know were friends for a few years, dated other people and would talk about what was going on, and then realized they were meant for each other.

We've been married only a short time 3 years, in each other's lives for 5.We never really dated just became friends and spent more and more time together enjoying each other's company and things flowed together I was very nervous and suspicious in the beginning as I expected him to turn on me.

He was and still is a very patient, kind and easy going guy.

For me I felt comfortable around him and for all my life I had been made to feel like an outsider like I wasn't good enough or worth it.
It was just easy to be with him I didn't need to worry and I could just be me and that was enough. I do remember hoping he'd like me.
Sex was also good when we got around to it. I had never really enjoyed sex , I finally understood what people were talking about how it could be fun and pleasurable.

He tells me I'm the first one to get his jokes.

Anonymous wrote:What were the first couple of months like when you first dated your spouse?

Married 20 years.. We met in college. I knew within a few dates I would marry him eventually. He had been a friend then we started dating. It was so easy to talk to him. We could talk about anything. I mean anything. Even today we can have a good time just talking to each other. We are very in sync despite coming from opposite backgrounds. We aren’t the same ethnicity, our parents couldn’t be more different, our childhoods were wildly different, but despite all those things, we are very compatible. I come from a culture of arranged marriages and conservatism. He’s not from such a background. Both of his parents have multiple marriages between them. Yet although no matchmaker would ever have put us together, he is my best friend. If something happens, I’d rather tell him before anyone else. I also know that we have a far better sex life than most of the couples in our circle. How do I know? Things they say and reading between the lines.

We just fell totally in love and knew within a month. ...Easy, exciting, romantic from very early on... No games or confusion. I just thought he was the cutest, sweetest boyfriend and after 25 years, two children and two demanding careers the vibe is still easy at core and the sexual connection is stll strong. I remember going to see Titanic together and feeling like, hey, that's us. The beginning was just very romantic.

Like some others we had been good friends for many years, almost best friends but he was a boy! In our senior year of college - different colleges - he said he was thinking about hitchhiking thru Europe before he headed to business school and he was going to go alone and I said would you like someone to go with you and he said sure. Then it dawned on me and him that we would be together 24/7 for six weeks but we agreed we could handle it. After about a week of being just friends sharing the same bed and having a great time we just let things happen and the rest of the trip was just one long 24/7 date. Six weeks of 24/7 was the ultimate early test of a beginning relationship. That was 27 years ago and since then we have visited a few of the places from that first trip where we spent about $25 a night and it has reminded us how much fun we had on our first long date. We are very happy, but I doubt he'd want to spend six weeks 24/7 with me hitching through Europe.

It was perfect from the very first date and I knew within three months we’d be together forever. 35 years later, looks like I was right!

Anonymous wrote:Hah! I was a junior in HS and he was a senior and we didn't have sex for three years - seriously. But it was HS fun and all that entails. Married 10 years and together 18 years.

We started dating at the same ages but waited even longer for sex, ha. We’ve been married for 13 years & together 23 years now.
We were best friends before we started dating, so it was pretty awesome to finally be together.

Aww I love this thread. I’m very happily married 8 years now, three kids. I had been friends with my DH for years; we were dating other people (I never had a serious boyfriend). I found him extremely attractive even though he isn’t conventionally so. He was the first to say I love you, and proposed six months after being together. I still love being around him and he’s my favorite person in the world. Even though he’s irritating me while we are confined to proverbial house arrest under Covid rules, we still had great sex last night and I intend to cash in my free back scratches he still owes me tonight while we Netflix and chill.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We had sex multiple times a day for a week. This quarantine days reminded me of that. We lived in NY. Take out galore. We married within the year. Ten years since and three kids later, we haven’t had sex since I gave birth, four years ago! But somehow we are really happy!

(Record scratch)

Um

Indeed. Something is off here.

I used to go on dates and think, "I hope I like him." DH was the first one I ever thought, "I hope he likes me." Luckily he did!

We just clicked from the first on every level. He had had serious relationships before; I never had. I didn't realize how good it was, but he did. He told me after 3 months of dating that he wanted to marry me, and I told him he was crazy.

But he wasn't. We dated for a couple of years, and when I finally agreed we should get married, he went straight to the phone to try to book a flight to Vegas that night. We didn't elope then, but we got married 3 months later.

Married 21 years now, and I still get butterflies when I see him.

Hah! I was a junior in HS and he was a senior and we didn't have sex for three years - seriously. But it was HS fun and all that entails. Married 10 years and together 18 years.

It was easy and set the tone for the future. No fights or big arguments, we both were open to where the other wanted to go and we just had fun. The sex was great too because for the first time I really experienced sex and real love at the same time and that really changed my attitude about giving and receiving pleasure.

Anonymous wrote:It was great as we had been very good friends for a few years and we knew each other very well. Once the spark was finally lit it was very smooth from Day 1. The only new real thing in our relationship was sex and spending more one on one time together and the sex was great once we got over the initial awkward phase. But being good friends before we got together was of great value.

This was us too.

Anonymous wrote:We had sex multiple times a day for a week. This quarantine days reminded me of that. We lived in NY. Take out galore. We married within the year. Ten years since and three kids later, we haven’t had sex since I gave birth, four years ago! But somehow we are really happy!

(Record scratch)

Um