Anonymous wrote:We did this. Kids older now and I really wish we hadn’t. Not good for the family, our marriage or relationships. It’s hard when “everyone is doing it”

I feel the opposite. This is how we have built our friendships (kids and adults alike) - with sports, scouts, dance, and school. Kids are now 20, 18 and 17 and getting ready for empty nest soon. All of the projects we've put off through the years can be done then but we spent the time together while we had each other.

I know lots of families like this. I don't get it, but to each their own.

Our DS does an after school activity 2-3 times a week but they are all over by 5 or 530 at the latest. Nothing on weekends, unless he wants to play a round of golf.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have two and I'm in the car running them around every night, and tournaments/games on weekends. I'm lucky if I have one night a week off.

And I'm perfectly fine with it. DS will be driving next month and that'll lighten my load, but the less time my kids have on their hands, the better they manage that smaller amount of time. And stay off video games/phones.

+1 We have two in college now, and just one at home. Our lives are quieter and easier, but there were a lot of pluses to the activity-packed years. We spent so much time with our kids and their friends/teammates, in the car, on the sidelines, and at tournaments. Our older two still play their sport in college, one varsity and one club, and they have both told us how grateful they are that they had the opportunity to play for all those years. It doesn't really take away from family time, just moves some of it out of the house and into the larger community.

+2
We do it because they completely love it. The sports, the camaraderie, great childhood memories.
We just have a couple years when they can drive some, but I know we'll miss it once they're away at college.

+ 3. Did it and loved it. It goes so fast! Enjoy the great conversations in the car, and their pure happiness in their activities!

Lots of people do it but we don’t. My kids do an instrument and an activity but not sports (except for summer swim which is in the morning with 1 meet/week.)

We were overscheduled for a year and I was miserable. Cut back to one activity per season and my daughter, who loves sports and was a bit upset to drop them came up to me and said it was a good call. we use the free time to do other things and we are enjoying the variety and the downtime.
It has impacted some friendships that revolved around sports but it has fostered new ones. I asked her if she wanted to pick up where she left off this year and she said no way.
I am happy to have time to myself and more opportunities to connect with her just going out for dinner, brunch, museums, movies. I didnt realize how much I missed just having this 1-1 time with her.

It's typical, but not pleasant, that's for sure. I only have two kids, but we're out in the evening 4 days of the week.

You can change it if you or they don’t like it.

We have two. Each has one sport at a time, and often has one other something else (art, after school activity or club, etc). They, and we, enjoy time reading, playing board or card games, watching a show as a family, and not feeling rushed for homework or studying.

Everyone isn’t the same. If it’s working, great, if not, change it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have two and I'm in the car running them around every night, and tournaments/games on weekends. I'm lucky if I have one night a week off.

And I'm perfectly fine with it. DS will be driving next month and that'll lighten my load, but the less time my kids have on their hands, the better they manage that smaller amount of time. And stay off video games/phones.

+1 We have two in college now, and just one at home. Our lives are quieter and easier, but there were a lot of pluses to the activity-packed years. We spent so much time with our kids and their friends/teammates, in the car, on the sidelines, and at tournaments. Our older two still play their sport in college, one varsity and one club, and they have both told us how grateful they are that they had the opportunity to play for all those years. It doesn't really take away from family time, just moves some of it out of the house and into the larger community.

+2
We do it because they completely love it. The sports, the camaraderie, great childhood memories.
We just have a couple years when they can drive some, but I know we'll miss it once they're away at college.

We have two middle schoolers. Both practice a sport, both are are in after school clubs. It's rare that we don't have a family dinner. That's normal for us.

Normal

Anonymous wrote:Not normal for our family (4 kids). Kids do not need to do every travel sport they are invited to do. Rec leagues are fine. Family time is really important to us.

Not OP, but I have two kids and neither do travel sports. By upper elementary school rec sports had more than more than one practice a week so someone is out every week night even with only two. We carpool and DH or I drive depending on our work schedules. We value family time but it’s mostly dinner together on the weekends. We love sports and think it’s important they participate as long as they are enjoying it. We also love weekend breakfasts and brunch.

I limit my 9 year old to two activities. He’s in scouts and music lesson (only once a week.). We are in average only out one night a week for scouts and music is on the weekend.

Anonymous wrote:I have two and I'm in the car running them around every night, and tournaments/games on weekends. I'm lucky if I have one night a week off.

And I'm perfectly fine with it. DS will be driving next month and that'll lighten my load, but the less time my kids have on their hands, the better they manage that smaller amount of time. And stay off video games/phones.

+1 We have two in college now, and just one at home. Our lives are quieter and easier, but there were a lot of pluses to the activity-packed years. We spent so much time with our kids and their friends/teammates, in the car, on the sidelines, and at tournaments. Our older two still play their sport in college, one varsity and one club, and they have both told us how grateful they are that they had the opportunity to play for all those years. It doesn't really take away from family time, just moves some of it out of the house and into the larger community.

I have two and I'm in the car running them around every night, and tournaments/games on weekends. I'm lucky if I have one night a week off.

And I'm perfectly fine with it. DS will be driving next month and that'll lighten my load, but the less time my kids have on their hands, the better they manage that smaller amount of time. And stay off video games/phones.

Anonymous wrote:Does this end by HS varsity sports? Don't they practice right after school?

Generally they're playing their sport on a club during the HS off-season. My DS plays HS soccer and as soon as that's over, club picks right up and is year-round. My DD's volleyball is a bit easier, HS season in Fall, club starts right after but ends by May. She'll still do camps and clinics and some go right to beach volleyball. That one is too crazy for me.