Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why don’t you guys agree to an open marriage? Your husband probably wants some, too.

You describe my marriage, and as the DH, I can tell you I am on the verge of cheating too. So why not just have an understanding, at least DADT? I would be totally fine with it. Bet your DH will be too.

I'm sure it is because in her heart she knows that she would be jealous if he slept around.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You took a step by telling him you are married. If he backs off, you can't cheat with him.

Not necessarily. Backing off of a woman you didn't realize was married is the decent thing to do. She's still free to go after him, but the ball is definitely in her court.

- A man

Yeah, but if I have to pursue you, it seems like a desperate loser move to me. I'd rather have a man leave no question he wants me.

See, here's the thing. If a man expresses interest in you, then finds out you're married and continues to "leave no question he wants" you, he is a dirtbag, because only dirtbags pursue married women that way. You want him? It's up to you to go and get him.

- A man

Dirtbags can be hot, too. In your scenario, we are playing morality chicken. I'd rather you be the "dirtbag" and sweep me off my feet (and away from good judgement) then for me to be some lonely, horny wife jumping at every d1ck which salutes me.

People who say "divorce, then date" don't know what they are talking about.

Life is not that simple.

Cheat. Enjoy life. Then, divorce if you want.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You took a step by telling him you are married. If he backs off, you can't cheat with him.

Not necessarily. Backing off of a woman you didn't realize was married is the decent thing to do. She's still free to go after him, but the ball is definitely in her court.

- A man

Yeah, but if I have to pursue you, it seems like a desperate loser move to me. I'd rather have a man leave no question he wants me.

See, here's the thing. If a man expresses interest in you, then finds out you're married and continues to "leave no question he wants" you, he is a dirtbag, because only dirtbags pursue married women that way. You want him? It's up to you to go and get him.

- A man

Anonymous wrote:^^^ Also, it feels like a terrible rejection when you tell a good, divorced or single man that you are in an open marriage, and he point blank tells you that he is not interested in playing third wheel in your marriage. If you want to date openly and honestly, with the ability to connect with the broadest group of men possible, file for divorce.

Any decent normal guy is going to think you're a fruit cake if you are married and living that way.

Yes divorce THEN date.

^^^ Also, it feels like a terrible rejection when you tell a good, divorced or single man that you are in an open marriage, and he point blank tells you that he is not interested in playing third wheel in your marriage. If you want to date openly and honestly, with the ability to connect with the broadest group of men possible, file for divorce.

OP it is very likely that this nice, divorced man and father is not interested in dating a woman in an open marriage, regardless of the extenuating circumstances in your case. The kind of man who will not object to dating you while you are still married, with no divorce filing in the offing, are other married or perhaps recently separated men. If you want to start to date, and to attract and date a good man, then file for divorce now. Otherwise you are living an open marriage, and many men will want nothing to do with that.

Anonymous wrote:I see a lot of these threads. Why not just divorce? So what?

Divorce is hard and expensive and affects so much about your lives and the kids. Why go through that if you make good co-parents and get along perfectly fine with your sexless spouse? Just outsource the one important thing that your marriage lacks. Win-win.

I see a lot of these threads. Why not just divorce? So what?

”Cheating was one of the stupidest and best things I've done ...”

Me too!


It was so exiting, I felt alive for once.

OP...technically it is the wrong thing to do, but give it a shot and enjoy life a little.

You don’t need to be in a relationship if you’re having these thoughts.

Anonymous wrote:Why don’t you guys agree to an open marriage? Your husband probably wants some, too.

You describe my marriage, and as the DH, I can tell you I am on the verge of cheating too. So why not just have an understanding, at least DADT? I would be totally fine with it. Bet your DH will be too.

Cheating was one of the stupidest and best things I've done ...

We just did a bet in our van pool...

OP, could you please go for it? ??

Anonymous wrote:Be courageous and end your marriage.
Show your kids how to be ethical.
They are watching.

+1