Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OMG. We mention your weight, you get pissed. We don't mention your weight, you get pissed.

I guess you make a good point. Though I don’t think you can ever offend a person by telling them they look like they’ve lost weight when you know they used to be heavier.

Ha! You’d be surprised.

Did you lose weight? You look great

No, do you think I need to lose weight?

No,

Then why ask that?

OMG you are nuts

Well if I did lose weight would you say something?

No because you lose weight for you not for others to comment on it.

Can you pass the oreos? you have eaten half the package already.

I often don't know whether to say something. I don't want you to think I thought you were fat before. If you're a good friend or family member, I'll say "you're looking really great!" Otherwise, I just don't want to inadvertently offend you.

Why doesn’t anyone on this post tell the truth! We all know that anytime someone we knows loses weight we congratulate them. Every single time! Unless they are dangerously getting too thin. The only reason nobody is commenting on OPs weight loss is because they are obviously really overweight to see a difference. If you are 300lbs you won’t see a difference until maybe you hit the 50lb plus mark. It’s all about percentages. This is why whenever we’ve had a weight loss contest at work it goes by percentages vs lbs because the 250lb person can lose more lbs then the 140lb person without any health risks. I lose 5lbs and everyone makes a comment to me! Just saying . OP keep going !

Anonymous wrote:One of the few people who noticed and commented on my weight loss was my mammogram tech. Apparently my breasts had lost fat/tissue since the prior year. So, my breasts lost weight while the rest of me pretty much didn't. Lol.

Great, thanks Tech, now you are telling me my boobs are smaller and saggier. (see it is no-win)

It's rude to mention. But I get it OP. My family comments when i gain weight, but says nothing when I lose weight, which would be much more effective if they are trying to encourage--you know, say nothing when you gain and praise when you lose.

At this point I'm so tired of family members talking about my weight, that I say nothing either way about anyone.

One of the few people who noticed and commented on my weight loss was my mammogram tech. Apparently my breasts had lost fat/tissue since the prior year. So, my breasts lost weight while the rest of me pretty much didn't. Lol.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I usually say "You look fantastic" and leave it at that. It's always been appreciated.

you can TELL when it's unhappy/unhealthy weight loss. Social cues, people.

Do you always tell Pepe they look fantastic or only when they lose weight?

DP but I tell people they look fantastic for lots of different reasons. Maybe they have lost weight and look good, maybe they’re dressed up, maybe they did something different with their hair, maybe they’re wearing something that brings out the color of their eyes or skin or hair, or is a flattering cut or whatever, etc. I don’t think it’s wrong to tell ever give someone you know a compliment like that. But I would not specifically tie it into weight, for the various reasons already mentioned.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OMG. We mention your weight, you get pissed. We don't mention your weight, you get pissed.

I guess you make a good point. Though I don’t think you can ever offend a person by telling them they look like they’ve lost weight when you know they used to be heavier.

The subtext of "You've lost weight, you look great" is " you used to be fat and ugly." No one wants to say that.

This.
Honestly, I saw my mom react like this when I was a child when someone commented on her weight loss. Therefore it is ingrained in me to never mention it.

I lost 20 pounds not long ago due to a medication I was taking. No one knew I was on the medication (it wasn't for weight loss). I also knew that as soon as I stopped the medication I would gain the weight right back.

I had quite a few people at work comment on my weight loss. It was quite rapid so it was noticeable. It was very awkward. Do I say well it is temporary and I will be back to my not great looking fatter self in a couple months? And honestly, I think I looked pretty good before the weight loss and it was strange to realize that people only thought I looked good when I was skinny. It was uncomfortable. I did tell a couple people who were asking how I did it that it was sue to a medical issue. People are really obseseesed with skinny and weight loss. Interestingly no one said anything when the weight came back.

I think first that it is not a good idea to be commenting on people's bodies in the workplace or other non-intimate settings. But I also refrain from saying anything weight-directed because in my experience the vast majority of people who lose 20-30 pounds at some point will before too long be back at their original weight. I don't want to create the impression by praising their weight loss that I think less of them when they put the weight back on at some point. As PPs have said, it creates the message that when you are thinner you are at your best (so when you are not . . .).

Whe people comment in weight loss you know it means they think thinner is better, that thin is good and fatter to them is bad. Not everyone shares that value that thinner is always better. Or that being thinner is something that should be congratulated. Sometimes weight loss is very unhealthy, some for the wrong reasons, the result of illness, a sign of an eating disorder etc.

You may think I look so much better but I may have loved myself with the extra 20 pounds and lost it for my own reasons not to look better to you. I can look fantastic at a few different weights.

I think it is always weird to comment on people's weight. No need to monitor if they are gaining or losing or staying the same unless they invite comment.

Anonymous wrote:I usually say "You look fantastic" and leave it at that. It's always been appreciated.

you can TELL when it's unhappy/unhealthy weight loss. Social cues, people.

Do you always tell Pepe they look fantastic or only when they lose weight?

People are too f**king politically correct. Just tell people they look great. They will say something like, "yes, i love my new haircut" or "yes, I lost 20 pounds!"

I will never be PC. And very blatantly so.

I'm sorry OP. I am sure you will have those fun moments though - you just need the right setting, the right outfit, and the person/people who feels comfortable commenting.

As long as you are noticing that is the most important thing of course. But when you buy something new that really fits you well, and clearly, that is probably when you'll start getting more comments. The baggy pants won't stand out the way a new, well-fitted, smaller sized pair might.

Congrats on your success!