I have a much, much younger friend who drives exactly like this. And I think has undiagnosed ADHD. I won't let her drive my kids.

My state does not impose restrictions on older drivers. So I don't think they require license renewal sight test or anything.

You just drive until you die.

Yes, my grandmother drove us like that and it was scary.

Anonymous wrote:Is there like a vision test we can ask her to take? Peripheral vision check?

There's the DMV sight test.

It might be a good idea to hire an occupational therapist to do a driving assessment.

https://www.aota.org/Practice/Productive-Aging/Driving.aspx

https://www.aota.org/Practice/Productive-Aging/Driving/driving-specialists-directory-search.aspx

Is there like a vision test we can ask her to take? Peripheral vision check?

Anonymous wrote:I recall someone trying to explain to their elderly dad "you might kill a child" and he didn't care until they added "and get sued for every penny you have".

I'm sure my MIL doesn't care. She doesn't have any money other than social security income. But she's extremely stubborn about being independent. She had to stay with her sister for a week because her house was being worked on and she couldn't stand it. Imagine, telling her to stop driving.

I recall someone trying to explain to their elderly dad "you might kill a child" and he didn't care until they added "and get sued for every penny you have".

OP here.

She hasn't had any accidents in the last 15 years that I know of. So it's all from the words of a 10 year old. Also, MIL's older sister, who is 85+, also drives by herself.

Anyway, I talked to DH (who is traveling) and I told him about the situation. He said he'll investigate the issue when he gets back tomorrow and talk to other family members. I'll push it with SIL too.

Today is the last day MIL is driving DD. I'm not going to allow it again.

Anonymous wrote:Have your MIL do one of the driving test. Have your DH drive with her to see how she drives.

Given you are anti-MIL, it is hard to know how much you overreacted to what could have been an innocent comment or incident. About 50% of drivers don't know how to merge.

Be fair to her. She didn't come off as anti-MIL. She did kind of come off as a self-centered twat, but not anti-MIL.

Here's a big F you from me, OP.

If your MIL hurts or kills someone from my family, I will bury you in so much paperwork you'll still be paying legal fees when you're a grandparent yourself.

I would be concerned with anyone driving at that age

OP, I hear you. My 78 year old mom drives down from PA most weeks to spend time with us. I am more and more worried about her driving the kids so I try to avoid having her drive them at all costs. My oldest son (17) takes Lyft when he doesn't have a car to drive. For my younger girls (15 and 12), I spend the money on a rides service for kids (Rubi).

Quite honestly I wish she weren't driving at all, but with where she lives in the middle of nowhere it's not an option not to drive. There's a much bigger conversation she refuses to have about moving to assisted living. At a minimum I want her to get a new/used safer car, but unfortunately none of us is in a financial position to just make that happen.

It sounds like you need to have a heart-to-heart with DH. He should be the one to rescind the offer to let his mom drive. It's not worth the risk to your DD, your MIL, and the other drivers on the road.

Have your MIL do one of the driving test. Have your DH drive with her to see how she drives.

Given you are anti-MIL, it is hard to know how much you overreacted to what could have been an innocent comment or incident. About 50% of drivers don't know how to merge.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Admit it, you’re happy to risk your DD’s safety for the sake of free childcare.

OP here. Not really. That’s why I’m asking here because I would rather not use MIL to pick DD up so I’m biased on the topic. MIL complains she doesn’t get to be part of DD life and DH asks her tondo school pick up so she’s not lonely and has something to do.

I’m the PP you responded to. Sorry for assuming!!

Shut it downnnnnn, girl!!!

Find a way for them to bond that does not involve any risk of death.