Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Np here who appreciates hearing the explanations. I'm like the questioning pp. With no experience in this realm, I don't understand it. It's great to have a place where sensitive questions can be asked and answered. Reading this, I'll be able to be more sensitive to people in real life going through this.

So you lack basic empathy? Nice.

Come down off your high horse. You need some frame of reference in order to have empathy.

Other people's misery is not your entertainment.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Np here who appreciates hearing the explanations. I'm like the questioning pp. With no experience in this realm, I don't understand it. It's great to have a place where sensitive questions can be asked and answered. Reading this, I'll be able to be more sensitive to people in real life going through this.

So you lack basic empathy? Nice.

No. And no high horse. But the question "why not adopt?" came to mind. And now I know that there are a variety of reasons, which op and a few pp's were gracious enough to take the question at face value and explain in a kind way.

Those explanations will help me not put my foot in my mouth when things like this come up in the future. I have a very close friend starting to research options to have a child as a single woman, and she's told me about some of the pitfalls she's finding. The less ignorance I have, the better odds that I don't say something inadvertently insensitive.

Best wishes to you.

congratulations, you're basic.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Np here who appreciates hearing the explanations. I'm like the questioning pp. With no experience in this realm, I don't understand it. It's great to have a place where sensitive questions can be asked and answered. Reading this, I'll be able to be more sensitive to people in real life going through this.

So you lack basic empathy? Nice.

No. And no high horse. But the question "why not adopt?" came to mind. And now I know that there are a variety of reasons, which op and a few pp's were gracious enough to take the question at face value and explain in a kind way.

Those explanations will help me not put my foot in my mouth when things like this come up in the future. I have a very close friend starting to research options to have a child as a single woman, and she's told me about some of the pitfalls she's finding. The less ignorance I have, the better odds that I don't say something inadvertently insensitive.

Best wishes to you.

NP, I am single woman who used a donor-donor embryo after years of trying to get pregnant through IUI/IVF with my own eggs. I am am still pregnant so this is all "in theory" bc I havent gotten that far. In my situation, the embryos were created using donor-donor material by another single woman who went through my clinic. She had 1 kid (all she wanted) and gave back the remaining embryos from the batch. I did 2 transfers and 1 took.

People typically point to a few well-known childrens books (Wish, etc.) but they tend to have mom-dad families or not deal with donor. There is one series that I know of that has many permutations of family building: https://www.dcnetwork.org/catalog/books-children

I plan to tell my child early and often. When I did the meeting with a counselor prior to my egg donation cycles, she suggested I talk about it to the child when they are an infant and "practice" what I will say before the baby really understands what I am talking about and is really just responding to my voice. Repetition and saying the words to your baby will help you get the story right. I liked that idea and found it helpful.

Anonymous wrote:Np here who appreciates hearing the explanations. I'm like the questioning pp. With no experience in this realm, I don't understand it. It's great to have a place where sensitive questions can be asked and answered. Reading this, I'll be able to be more sensitive to people in real life going through this.

OP here. NP, so many parts of this infertility journey were just new concepts and things I had never contemplated (or had even heard of). I totally get what you mean.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Np here who appreciates hearing the explanations. I'm like the questioning pp. With no experience in this realm, I don't understand it. It's great to have a place where sensitive questions can be asked and answered. Reading this, I'll be able to be more sensitive to people in real life going through this.

So you lack basic empathy? Nice.

Come down off your high horse. You need some frame of reference in order to have empathy.