Anonymous wrote:Change her start time to 30 mins before

That was my first thought too!

My husband refuses to treat his ADHD and the most consistent result is that he is habitually tardy for everything: he's late to work, mealtimes are late when he's on cooking duty, EVERYTHING. He cannot time manage, except when the boss says: "today be on time or else!". For our wedding day, he was early, a fact he gloats about because apparently it excuses all the other days of his life...

Sounds like the nanny has a similar problem. You need to start docking pay so that she makes it a priority to be on time.

Going slightly against the grain - I would have a long talk with her about how timeliness is actually crucial to the job. I have a similar situation with my nanny (not being late - she's actually always on time - but taking very last minute time off). I regret that I did not set a clearer boundary with her about this at the beginning, because it's kind of hard to go back and change that pattern. One of my regrets is that it eventually will make it slightly harder to give her a perfectly glowing recommendation, because I won't be able to honestly say that she's great with the scheduling.

On the other hand, it's true that you're never going to find the perfect nanny. Think about how you'd feel if you found a nanny who was always exactly punctual, but was cold with your kids, never took them outside, got sick all the time, etc etc. If you otherwise have a really good relationship, then I'd think hard about making this your dealbreaker.

Probably what you need to do is just accept that you can't rely on her to show up on time for your 9am meetings. So you either don't schedule 9am meetings, or you tell your spouse that HE is the one who is going to have to deal with waiting at home. (in fact I wonder why you let him leave, when you know there's a chance she'll be late?)

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People, employees and employers, who are habitually late are immature and disrespectful. Not to mention stunningly self-involved.

I used to think this, too, until I moved to this area.

Just today, my typical 25 minute commute turned into an hour commute because a dump truck lost a bunch of his load in the road. The police u-turned both sides of the road and I had to backtrack to go the other way to work. Of course, had it happened 5 minutes earlier, waze would have caught it and rerouted me, saving me the backtracking time.

When I was commuting using Metro, I didn't even schedule a meeting for earlier than 10 am. If I was required to attend one that was scheduled by someone else for early that morning, I made sure I left my house at least 2 full hours early. Sometimes even earlier. I can remember plenty of days when I left my house at 6:30 am, caught the commuter bus to the Reston Metro, caught the Metro at 7:20, and didn't make it to the office until 9.

I currently commute from MoCo to DC and have every single day for almost 5 years. I start out on the Red Line and have to switch to Green. I can count the number of times I've been late for work due to Metro delays - it's less than 10. Nanny is lying to OP about delays.

Fire her.

She might be absolutely wonderful but her lateness is impacting your work and you need to find somebody who lives closer.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People, employees and employers, who are habitually late are immature and disrespectful. Not to mention stunningly self-involved.

I used to think this, too, until I moved to this area.

Just today, my typical 25 minute commute turned into an hour commute because a dump truck lost a bunch of his load in the road. The police u-turned both sides of the road and I had to backtrack to go the other way to work. Of course, had it happened 5 minutes earlier, waze would have caught it and rerouted me, saving me the backtracking time.

When I was commuting using Metro, I didn't even schedule a meeting for earlier than 10 am. If I was required to attend one that was scheduled by someone else for early that morning, I made sure I left my house at least 2 full hours early. Sometimes even earlier. I can remember plenty of days when I left my house at 6:30 am, caught the commuter bus to the Reston Metro, caught the Metro at 7:20, and didn't make it to the office until 9.

This does not happen three times a week every week. Get honest.

You need a nanny who either drives or doesn't live an hour away.

Change her start time.

I'd fire her and hire someone else. Someone who lives closer.

You shouldn't have to pay her for her stupidity by telling her to get to work a half hour earlier. Everyone else somehow manages public transportation and getting to work on time. If she can't, find someone who can.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People, employees and employers, who are habitually late are immature and disrespectful. Not to mention stunningly self-involved.

I used to think this, too, until I moved to this area.

Just today, my typical 25 minute commute turned into an hour commute because a dump truck lost a bunch of his load in the road. The police u-turned both sides of the road and I had to backtrack to go the other way to work. Of course, had it happened 5 minutes earlier, waze would have caught it and rerouted me, saving me the backtracking time.

When I was commuting using Metro, I didn't even schedule a meeting for earlier than 10 am. If I was required to attend one that was scheduled by someone else for early that morning, I made sure I left my house at least 2 full hours early. Sometimes even earlier. I can remember plenty of days when I left my house at 6:30 am, caught the commuter bus to the Reston Metro, caught the Metro at 7:20, and didn't make it to the office until 9.

I'll see your dump truck accident rerouting me though the most congested part of my commute, which I also encountered this morning, and raise you 3/4 carpool kids not getting in the car on time, thus missing the school bus, requiring me to drive them across town to school, which is way out of my way.

However, in two years, this is the first time either of these things has happened at all, let alone on the same day. It does not excuse chronic lateness by an employee.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People, employees and employers, who are habitually late are immature and disrespectful. Not to mention stunningly self-involved.

I used to think this, too, until I moved to this area.

Just today, my typical 25 minute commute turned into an hour commute because a dump truck lost a bunch of his load in the road. The police u-turned both sides of the road and I had to backtrack to go the other way to work. Of course, had it happened 5 minutes earlier, waze would have caught it and rerouted me, saving me the backtracking time.

When I was commuting using Metro, I didn't even schedule a meeting for earlier than 10 am. If I was required to attend one that was scheduled by someone else for early that morning, I made sure I left my house at least 2 full hours early. Sometimes even earlier. I can remember plenty of days when I left my house at 6:30 am, caught the commuter bus to the Reston Metro, caught the Metro at 7:20, and didn't make it to the office until 9.

That is a valid point. Maybe the Nanny just lives too far away for it to be practical to work for her.

Anonymous wrote:Echoing PPs so I wont repeat, but on days when it is super critical for you to get to work on time, can you give her a heads-up the day before- just a big nudge that she really needs to be there on time so she needs to prepare to move mountains if that is what it takes.

Actually you tell her to be early those days.

She has a chronic issue, and you've already spoken to her about it twice, and still it persists.

Under these circumstances, I recommend that you resign yourself to the fact that this is how she is and how she will be forever. Then weigh the other pros and cons and decide if you want to get a new nanny or not. There's no right answer, whatever is best for you.

Anonymous wrote:People, employees and employers, who are habitually late are immature and disrespectful. Not to mention stunningly self-involved.

I used to think this, too, until I moved to this area.

Just today, my typical 25 minute commute turned into an hour commute because a dump truck lost a bunch of his load in the road. The police u-turned both sides of the road and I had to backtrack to go the other way to work. Of course, had it happened 5 minutes earlier, waze would have caught it and rerouted me, saving me the backtracking time.

When I was commuting using Metro, I didn't even schedule a meeting for earlier than 10 am. If I was required to attend one that was scheduled by someone else for early that morning, I made sure I left my house at least 2 full hours early. Sometimes even earlier. I can remember plenty of days when I left my house at 6:30 am, caught the commuter bus to the Reston Metro, caught the Metro at 7:20, and didn't make it to the office until 9.