Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It depends on how much time I have. Sometimes we just get a card. I always feel crummy about it. We don’t ever really know these kids and I have no idea what to get them, and I ask their parents but they rarely respond.

This is awful. You know the kids well enough to attend their parties you have no more or less time than the rest of us. Gmafb - you can get them something your kids would like, a gift card, cash. So because you feign not knowing what to get them, are too busy and their parents don’t tell you what to buy - you have your kid hand them a card and it isn’t because you can’t afford a gift?! Dear Lord, you suck.

No I don’t actually know the kids. My kid is in preschool. She gets an invite every second or third week. We rarely can make it to the parties, there’s not usually enough notice as we work weekends, and I never even know who the parents are...they leave the invite in child’s cubby. I do RSVP promptly though. Thanks for judging me so much. You’re not very kind.

We’re not talking about the parties you don’t make it to. Whether YOU know the kid is not relevant. If you accept a bday party invitation, you show up with a gift. Unless there is a valid reason not to: cannot afford, party said no gifts, you’re ill, etc. You initially at least said you feel crummy about just giving a card but now you seem to justify it. It’s pretty bad to put your kid in that position and makes the family look bad.

No. I just think the previous poster was super rude and taking a bad day out on an online stranger.

I actually don’t think the previous poster was rude at all. I have certainly seen worse in DCUM. But I do think it’s rude to show up with just a card.

I’m not sure. We certainly don’t expect gifts. We want all the kids to have fun. We are hosting and give favors. It’s for them all to have a good experience. Gifts are nice but not expected. And I don’t think it’s rude to come empty handed if it’s do that or not bring your child. My kid would rather see their friend than get some forgettable gift. We give the birthday presents, friends are for fun.

When we were on the preschool and early ES party circuit, I spent as little as possible. One year, I scored a stash of Melissa & Doug toys brand new for about $5-$7 each so we brought those to a few parties. A few years later, I found an art supply kit with a bunch of different supplies - markers, colored pencils, nice water colors, oil crayons, charcoal pencils - for $10 so I bought a few of those and brought them as gifts. Craft kits at after Christmas sales were great resources as well.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It depends on how much time I have. Sometimes we just get a card. I always feel crummy about it. We don’t ever really know these kids and I have no idea what to get them, and I ask their parents but they rarely respond.

This is awful. You know the kids well enough to attend their parties you have no more or less time than the rest of us. Gmafb - you can get them something your kids would like, a gift card, cash. So because you feign not knowing what to get them, are too busy and their parents don’t tell you what to buy - you have your kid hand them a card and it isn’t because you can’t afford a gift?! Dear Lord, you suck.

No I don’t actually know the kids. My kid is in preschool. She gets an invite every second or third week. We rarely can make it to the parties, there’s not usually enough notice as we work weekends, and I never even know who the parents are...they leave the invite in child’s cubby. I do RSVP promptly though. Thanks for judging me so much. You’re not very kind.

We’re not talking about the parties you don’t make it to. Whether YOU know the kid is not relevant. If you accept a bday party invitation, you show up with a gift. Unless there is a valid reason not to: cannot afford, party said no gifts, you’re ill, etc. You initially at least said you feel crummy about just giving a card but now you seem to justify it. It’s pretty bad to put your kid in that position and makes the family look bad.

No. I just think the previous poster was super rude and taking a bad day out on an online stranger.

I actually don’t think the previous poster was rude at all. I have certainly seen worse in DCUM. But I do think it’s rude to show up with just a card.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It depends on how much time I have. Sometimes we just get a card. I always feel crummy about it. We don’t ever really know these kids and I have no idea what to get them, and I ask their parents but they rarely respond.

This is awful. You know the kids well enough to attend their parties you have no more or less time than the rest of us. Gmafb - you can get them something your kids would like, a gift card, cash. So because you feign not knowing what to get them, are too busy and their parents don’t tell you what to buy - you have your kid hand them a card and it isn’t because you can’t afford a gift?! Dear Lord, you suck.

No I don’t actually know the kids. My kid is in preschool. She gets an invite every second or third week. We rarely can make it to the parties, there’s not usually enough notice as we work weekends, and I never even know who the parents are...they leave the invite in child’s cubby. I do RSVP promptly though. Thanks for judging me so much. You’re not very kind.

We’re not talking about the parties you don’t make it to. Whether YOU know the kid is not relevant. If you accept a bday party invitation, you show up with a gift. Unless there is a valid reason not to: cannot afford, party said no gifts, you’re ill, etc. You initially at least said you feel crummy about just giving a card but now you seem to justify it. It’s pretty bad to put your kid in that position and makes the family look bad.

No. I just think the previous poster was super rude and taking a bad day out on an online stranger.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It depends on how much time I have. Sometimes we just get a card. I always feel crummy about it. We don’t ever really know these kids and I have no idea what to get them, and I ask their parents but they rarely respond.

This is awful. You know the kids well enough to attend their parties you have no more or less time than the rest of us. Gmafb - you can get them something your kids would like, a gift card, cash. So because you feign not knowing what to get them, are too busy and their parents don’t tell you what to buy - you have your kid hand them a card and it isn’t because you can’t afford a gift?! Dear Lord, you suck.

The gift is price of admission?

You bring something when invited to someone’s home for dinner or to a bday party. It’s not an admission fee but an expected thing based on socially accepted rules in our culture. If you can’t comply, rsvp no. Very, very easy.
Do you tip hair dressers, waiters, cab drivers, etc?

$15ish

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It depends on how much time I have. Sometimes we just get a card. I always feel crummy about it. We don’t ever really know these kids and I have no idea what to get them, and I ask their parents but they rarely respond.

This is awful. You know the kids well enough to attend their parties you have no more or less time than the rest of us. Gmafb - you can get them something your kids would like, a gift card, cash. So because you feign not knowing what to get them, are too busy and their parents don’t tell you what to buy - you have your kid hand them a card and it isn’t because you can’t afford a gift?! Dear Lord, you suck.

No I don’t actually know the kids. My kid is in preschool. She gets an invite every second or third week. We rarely can make it to the parties, there’s not usually enough notice as we work weekends, and I never even know who the parents are...they leave the invite in child’s cubby. I do RSVP promptly though. Thanks for judging me so much. You’re not very kind.

We’re not talking about the parties you don’t make it to. Whether YOU know the kid is not relevant. If you accept a bday party invitation, you show up with a gift. Unless there is a valid reason not to: cannot afford, party said no gifts, you’re ill, etc. You initially at least said you feel crummy about just giving a card but now you seem to justify it. It’s pretty bad to put your kid in that position and makes the family look bad.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It depends on how much time I have. Sometimes we just get a card. I always feel crummy about it. We don’t ever really know these kids and I have no idea what to get them, and I ask their parents but they rarely respond.

This is awful. You know the kids well enough to attend their parties you have no more or less time than the rest of us. Gmafb - you can get them something your kids would like, a gift card, cash. So because you feign not knowing what to get them, are too busy and their parents don’t tell you what to buy - you have your kid hand them a card and it isn’t because you can’t afford a gift?! Dear Lord, you suck.

No I don’t actually know the kids. My kid is in preschool. She gets an invite every second or third week. We rarely can make it to the parties, there’s not usually enough notice as we work weekends, and I never even know who the parents are...they leave the invite in child’s cubby. I do RSVP promptly though. Thanks for judging me so much. You’re not very kind.

I am super cheap and even I don’t just show up with a card. It doesn’t matter whether I know or don’t know the kid, I always buy something that I think kids that age would like.

My youngest is 2nd grade but our experience was $10-$15 in preschool and $15-$20 in early elementary for gifts received at whole class parties.

$15-$20

Yes, 20-25.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It depends on how much time I have. Sometimes we just get a card. I always feel crummy about it. We don’t ever really know these kids and I have no idea what to get them, and I ask their parents but they rarely respond.

This is awful. You know the kids well enough to attend their parties you have no more or less time than the rest of us. Gmafb - you can get them something your kids would like, a gift card, cash. So because you feign not knowing what to get them, are too busy and their parents don’t tell you what to buy - you have your kid hand them a card and it isn’t because you can’t afford a gift?! Dear Lord, you suck.

The gift is price of admission?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It depends on how much time I have. Sometimes we just get a card. I always feel crummy about it. We don’t ever really know these kids and I have no idea what to get them, and I ask their parents but they rarely respond.

This is awful. You know the kids well enough to attend their parties you have no more or less time than the rest of us. Gmafb - you can get them something your kids would like, a gift card, cash. So because you feign not knowing what to get them, are too busy and their parents don’t tell you what to buy - you have your kid hand them a card and it isn’t because you can’t afford a gift?! Dear Lord, you suck.

No I don’t actually know the kids. My kid is in preschool. She gets an invite every second or third week. We rarely can make it to the parties, there’s not usually enough notice as we work weekends, and I never even know who the parents are...they leave the invite in child’s cubby. I do RSVP promptly though. Thanks for judging me so much. You’re not very kind.

Also not I’m feigning, parent high horse. . I’d rather get the kid something they really like than just have a grab bag of bullshit sitting in the house that is going to get thrown out because the parent doesn’t approve of.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It depends on how much time I have. Sometimes we just get a card. I always feel crummy about it. We don’t ever really know these kids and I have no idea what to get them, and I ask their parents but they rarely respond.

This is awful. You know the kids well enough to attend their parties you have no more or less time than the rest of us. Gmafb - you can get them something your kids would like, a gift card, cash. So because you feign not knowing what to get them, are too busy and their parents don’t tell you what to buy - you have your kid hand them a card and it isn’t because you can’t afford a gift?! Dear Lord, you suck.

No I don’t actually know the kids. My kid is in preschool. She gets an invite every second or third week. We rarely can make it to the parties, there’s not usually enough notice as we work weekends, and I never even know who the parents are...they leave the invite in child’s cubby. I do RSVP promptly though. Thanks for judging me so much. You’re not very kind.

Anonymous wrote:It depends on how much time I have. Sometimes we just get a card. I always feel crummy about it. We don’t ever really know these kids and I have no idea what to get them, and I ask their parents but they rarely respond.

This is awful. You know the kids well enough to attend their parties you have no more or less time than the rest of us. Gmafb - you can get them something your kids would like, a gift card, cash. So because you feign not knowing what to get them, are too busy and their parents don’t tell you what to buy - you have your kid hand them a card and it isn’t because you can’t afford a gift?! Dear Lord, you suck.