Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s bothers me that schools even allow this. Why not just let 10 year olds in K?? I mean wouldn’t they perform better then? /s.

I don’t understand why this bothers you. If he’s not successful in K he’s going to have to repeat at the expense of the school district and will still be older than everyone plus he’ll have to deal with the emotions fall out of repeating while his classmates advance. It’s the same outcome.

It is a slippery slope. This lady thinks it’s fine to send a 6y8m old kid to K. If that’s fine, why not 7? 7.5? At some point the answer just has to be NO.

Maybe the schools shouldn’t have made kindergarten so developmentally inappropriate; then fewer people would have reservations about all-day desk work, 20” lunch and no recess for 5 year olds.

Just because a few kids struggle doesn’t mean K should be dumbed down for the rest or kids should be allowed to start as late as their parents want. Already they’ve moved the cutoff from 12/31 that it was when we were kids. And no one redshirted then.

Who is this “we”? The cutoff was 11/1 when I was a kid.

And there were minimal academic expectations of kindergarteners then.

Yeah, I’ve always lived in places with a 9/30 cutoff and plenty of redshirted kids. I have a summer birthday and was not redshirted, but I had friends who were a year older than me in the same grade, and my age in the grade below. I was born in the mid 80s and grew up in the Midwest.

So honest question for all those who think it’s totally fine, how old is too old for K. Please specify an exact age.

The fact remains that most kids finish kindergarten without tutors, struggling, repeating K, or redshirting. So it can’t be that hard.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s bothers me that schools even allow this. Why not just let 10 year olds in K?? I mean wouldn’t they perform better then? /s.

I don’t understand why this bothers you. If he’s not successful in K he’s going to have to repeat at the expense of the school district and will still be older than everyone plus he’ll have to deal with the emotions fall out of repeating while his classmates advance. It’s the same outcome.

It is a slippery slope. This lady thinks it’s fine to send a 6y8m old kid to K. If that’s fine, why not 7? 7.5? At some point the answer just has to be NO.

Maybe the schools shouldn’t have made kindergarten so developmentally inappropriate; then fewer people would have reservations about all-day desk work, 20” lunch and no recess for 5 year olds.

Just because a few kids struggle doesn’t mean K should be dumbed down for the rest or kids should be allowed to start as late as their parents want. Already they’ve moved the cutoff from 12/31 that it was when we were kids. And no one redshirted then.

Who is this “we”? The cutoff was 11/1 when I was a kid.

And there were minimal academic expectations of kindergarteners then.

Yeah, I’ve always lived in places with a 9/30 cutoff and plenty of redshirted kids. I have a summer birthday and was not redshirted, but I had friends who were a year older than me in the same grade, and my age in the grade below. I was born in the mid 80s and grew up in the Midwest.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s bothers me that schools even allow this. Why not just let 10 year olds in K?? I mean wouldn’t they perform better then? /s.

I don’t understand why this bothers you. If he’s not successful in K he’s going to have to repeat at the expense of the school district and will still be older than everyone plus he’ll have to deal with the emotions fall out of repeating while his classmates advance. It’s the same outcome.

It is a slippery slope. This lady thinks it’s fine to send a 6y8m old kid to K. If that’s fine, why not 7? 7.5? At some point the answer just has to be NO.

Maybe the schools shouldn’t have made kindergarten so developmentally inappropriate; then fewer people would have reservations about all-day desk work, 20” lunch and no recess for 5 year olds.

Just because a few kids struggle doesn’t mean K should be dumbed down for the rest or kids should be allowed to start as late as their parents want. Already they’ve moved the cutoff from 12/31 that it was when we were kids. And no one redshirted then.

Who is this “we”? The cutoff was 11/1 when I was a kid.

And there were minimal academic expectations of kindergarteners then.

Anonymous wrote:I would rely on your current teacher too. She sees/works with this age group everyday and understands the norm. I agree that it is too early to make a decision.

Most preschool teachers are not trained in language disorders and cannot predict the future.

I have a child with a language disorder and we have tricare. We initially held back as we were pushed (but it was also a birthday issue). It was a huge mistake. At 5, things were a struggle, but a few years later things looked very different and it was clear it was a mistake and child skipped a grade. Tricare is very generous with speech therapy. Take advantage of it. We went several days a week. Socially it was far better being with older kids as some act the age of the kids they are with so mine acted much younger. The stronger curriculum/speed was also better and helpful for the language development. I would not hold a child back do to a language disorder. You work on the language disorder and get as much speech therapy as you can, especially if you have tricare, which is one of the few that will pay generously.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s bothers me that schools even allow this. Why not just let 10 year olds in K?? I mean wouldn’t they perform better then? /s.

I don’t understand why this bothers you. If he’s not successful in K he’s going to have to repeat at the expense of the school district and will still be older than everyone plus he’ll have to deal with the emotions fall out of repeating while his classmates advance. It’s the same outcome.

It is a slippery slope. This lady thinks it’s fine to send a 6y8m old kid to K. If that’s fine, why not 7? 7.5? At some point the answer just has to be NO.

Maybe the schools shouldn’t have made kindergarten so developmentally inappropriate; then fewer people would have reservations about all-day desk work, 20” lunch and no recess for 5 year olds.

Just because a few kids struggle doesn’t mean K should be dumbed down for the rest or kids should be allowed to start as late as their parents want. Already they’ve moved the cutoff from 12/31 that it was when we were kids. And no one redshirted then.

^^ I’m actually not 100% sure if it’s true for HS; definitely for ES and MS.

There is not very much redshirting in DC in public school, so a January birthday would be truly bizarre and stand out a lot. (There is not a single red-shirted kid in our IB PK4 class and there are two late September birthdays including one small boy). In fact, in DCPS, he will actually be ineligible for some sports if he’s already turned the next age before the season (so definitely Spring and possibly Winter depending on when the birthday is). This may be less of a concern if you’re leaving the area, but you should check the rules wherever you’re heading if this matters to you (I.e., your son would not be allowed to do Winter or Spring sports in his last year of ES or MS or HS).

If you’re heading to private/elsewhere in the country soon, there may be more redshirting so this might not be quite as obviously “this kid is 9 months older than the next oldest kid.” I agree with posters that young ES kids will be nice about it/not notice, but I promise you by middle school kids will notice your son is way older... It will be particularly bad if he goes through puberty on the early side.

Anonymous wrote:What I would do is find a small, private kindergarten run by a church preschool program. The preschool where my DS goes has a full day K class and it has the benefit of a nice, small class size with lots of individual attention. Then you can decide for yourself if your DS is ready to go to public 1st or if he needs to repeat K in the public schools. My gut says with a year of small, private K, plus, hopefully, good speech therapy, that he’ll be able to go to public 1st and stay on grade level. A year is a long time at this age. Good luck OP!

This is a good idea- I had a late August birthday (female) so this is what my mom did. I went to private kindergarten in a little church preschool and then she ended up sending me to 1st because after that year they felt I was ready. But it gave her the option to decide to have me just start in K at the public school too. Anecdotally she’s always said she still wishes she’d just put me in K again in hindsight because she figures why not give me the extra year, but I was August and no special needs so I was totally fine and think she made a good decision.

Yes, I would do what you said about doing a K somewhere else and then see if K is needed again or you can do 1st. My March birthday nephew seemed a bit behind but was sent on time but then his school suggested in first grade that he repeat first grade. My sister did end up wishing he hadn’t already spent 2 years with these kids and then saw them move up without him. She decided to move him from that school after that. So the age differs ended up being the same regardless.

As a teacher and a mother I suggest you seek other ways to help him rather than holding him back (and then lying about it!)
If he has special needs, those problems are not going to go away by waiting, he most likely needs help with therapy, early intervention is key here.
So my answer is no, don't hold him back, get help.

What kind of needs does he have? That might help us point you in the right direction

A few years ago my DS had two brothers at his school that were almost 2 years older than the other kids in the grade. Both boys were amazing athlete all thru middle school but by 10th grade it caught up and they were still good, but no longer amazing. DS was in the grade with the older boy who was almost 1.5 years older than him and the boy in the grade behind my son was 6 months older than him. Also, I felt it would be a little weird for the girls they would interact with. you have a 14 year old boy with 12 year old girls.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s bothers me that schools even allow this. Why not just let 10 year olds in K?? I mean wouldn’t they perform better then? /s.

I don’t understand why this bothers you. If he’s not successful in K he’s going to have to repeat at the expense of the school district and will still be older than everyone plus he’ll have to deal with the emotions fall out of repeating while his classmates advance. It’s the same outcome.

It is a slippery slope. This lady thinks it’s fine to send a 6y8m old kid to K. If that’s fine, why not 7? 7.5? At some point the answer just has to be NO.

Maybe the schools shouldn’t have made kindergarten so developmentally inappropriate; then fewer people would have reservations about all-day desk work, 20” lunch and no recess for 5 year olds.

I don’t disagree about the K expectations but would appreciate you naming the school that does not have recess for five year olds.

It would be a little odd in public, but perfectly acceptable in private.