Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have been friendly for a man who is 20 years older.

I am 30 he’s 50.

How bad is this? honestly, I’m attracted to him in so many ways!

Men- have you dated someone half your age?

I did when i was 4 and she was 2. It didn't last.

Why not? She spent too much time changing diapers?

Anonymous wrote:I’m 39. The only good thing about being divorced has been sleeping with new women, many of whom are in their 20s.

To me being in your 30's and dating people in their 20's isn't such a big thing even if you said 21-22 year olds. I guess for me it's more about the stage of life people are at and the 20-30's blend into each other.

However now that I am in my 40's I just can't see myself ever wanting to date someone in their 20's as they seem to be at such a different stage in life to me, I would find myself not relating on so many things. Would I really want to go to music festivals and the answer is no. I don't want to dance till 5am.

I feel the same for people 50 dating a 70 year. I just think one is heading for retirement and the other is headed for old age, such different stages.

If I dated a 22 year old at 39 and it became serious I really would be wondering if that same person is going to still be with me when I'm 70-75. I have just watched my MIL pretty much give up retirement as my FIL just got old and didn't want to do so much. This would be my worries for the future and now yes she is really spending her days as a care giver.

But I guess that's why most men post that it's all about sleeping with them in their 20's, there doesn't sound like too much depth there. Apart from sleeping with them there is no mention of enjoying their company it's just all about sex.

I think most of the responses in this thread are from middle aged women afraid that a younger model is going to seduce their husbands away from them.

Anonymous wrote:I'm 49 wife is 28.

How did you commit to her
Were people judgmental

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Like PP said, have fun but don’t get serious. Caregiving aside, men generally lose energy as they get older while women gain it. Even a gap of just a few years can be frustrating.

So true. My DH and I are both 48. I have a ton of energy, I work out daily, etc. He's ready to crash by 8pm, has gained a lot of weight, is pushing himself to work out twice a week. Just very different energy levels.

because he is working a job and you are stay at home....

I'm 49 wife is 28.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Consider the consequences when you reach 50-60. One of them may be that you will have to become his caretaker. There's only a 10 year age difference between my husband I, but this possibility keeps popping up in my mind.

DH and I have a similar age difference but we’ve been married since 25/37. We have a house, two kids, and a full, happy life together. If I end up caring for him, at least I’ll be doing it when I’m relatively young and capable myself. It’s really hard when two people are both failing and having to be caregivers. And we will have something like 40 years of happy marriage behind us when that phase arrives, most likely.

Your situation is much worse. You will do all the care-taking and he will do none for you if you have the normal progression of life. You will be living a lifestyle a decade older than your age. At least if the same age the couple can help each other out throughout their lives and go through the same life stages together.

Agree. My parents were the same age. As they lived through their 80’s they were able to help each other out when needed. Near 90, they shared the same health aide who did light house keeping & shopping for them. Died at 91 within 6 months of each other rather quickly once started declining. Married 65 years. We were fortunate as they were able to take care of each other for the majority of their life.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Consider the consequences when you reach 50-60. One of them may be that you will have to become his caretaker. There's only a 10 year age difference between my husband I, but this possibility keeps popping up in my mind.

DH and I have a similar age difference but we’ve been married since 25/37. We have a house, two kids, and a full, happy life together. If I end up caring for him, at least I’ll be doing it when I’m relatively young and capable myself. It’s really hard when two people are both failing and having to be caregivers. And we will have something like 40 years of happy marriage behind us when that phase arrives, most likely.

Your situation is much worse. You will do all the care-taking and he will do none for you if you have the normal progression of life. You will be living a lifestyle a decade older than your age. At least if the same age the couple can help each other out throughout their lives and go through the same life stages together.

I’m 39. The only good thing about being divorced has been sleeping with new women, many of whom are in their 20s.

Anonymous wrote:I have been friendly for a man who is 20 years older.

I am 30 he’s 50.

How bad is this? honestly, I’m attracted to him in so many ways!

Men- have you dated someone half your age?

I did when i was 4 and she was 2. It didn't last.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Have a fling but don't marry. My sister did this and she is now a nursemaid to a man with advanced Parkinsons and she is beyond miserable.

obviously a WONDERFUL human being. !!!! sounds like a selfish unfeeling pig

Wow. Who said she didn't still love him? Just because it is difficult and her life is challenging (miserable, even) doesn't mean she isn't feeling or doesn't care for him. Obviously she loves him and is caring for him. If roles were reversed it is likely he would have divorced her.

She sounds unselfish to me. She's doing the difficult work of caregiving. Don't be so quick to judge.

Anonymous wrote:Like PP said, have fun but don’t get serious. Caregiving aside, men generally lose energy as they get older while women gain it. Even a gap of just a few years can be frustrating.

LOL that is the opposite of reality. Women “lose” energy earlier vs men. Look through the posts on this site. The common theme is how tired women are while the men want to do things.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Have a fling but don't marry. My sister did this and she is now a nursemaid to a man with advanced Parkinsons and she is beyond miserable.

obviously a WONDERFUL human being. !!!! sounds like a selfish unfeeling pig

So it's OK when men are caregivers and they complain about it/want affairs/divorce but when women just complain, they're pigs? Nope.

Thread's a couple months old, don't expect to hear from OP, but the rule of thumb is half your age plus seven years, so you you're pushing it but it could work.

I pushed it by a few years at 36 with a 23 y.o. GF. It was fun but there were issues...

Anonymous wrote:I have been friendly for a man who is 20 years older.

I am 30 he’s 50.

How bad is this? honestly, I’m attracted to him in so many ways!

Men- have you dated someone half your age?

Wish I have but, sadly, no.