Make sure that she is allowed to sit in the bench. At my son’s school, they will yell at any kid who is on the school grounds and not in an official club. My son has missed a club because he had trouble finding the room and gotten yelled at to leave. And gotten yelled at very being outside on school property.

Is there no bus service at all, or just no bus service to where you live? Could she catch the bus to a local public library or similar and wait for you there?

Yikes. I’m unclear what you are worried about. At 12/13?? In front of a school full of teachers and probably still students (with clubs going on and team sports). I think you are being an excessive worrywart, cut that cord. Most kids that age do lots of activities on their own. Please allow this girl to build healthy independence.

Our MS has scheduled activities with a late bus three days/week, and on the other two days still doesn't lock up immediately as kids can still meet with teachers by appointment and just need to arrange their own transportation. So my kid would have plenty of opportunities during that half hour. She could visit a teacher for extra help, do homework in the cafeteria, the library may be open, etc. I'd definitely leave her under those circumstances.

Without that, the school is in a safe area and there are benches out front so it probably wouldn't be an issue even if she had to wait outside for me unless the weather was bad. She wouldn't like it so I probably wouldn't do it regularly, but only for her comfort and not because I was worried about her safety.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Kids get nervous. Half an hour might be a very long time for a kid. Don't know, I probably wouldn't do it.

For a kid with a phone, a half hour will fly by. There really is no big deal here.

Although, what middle school completely locks up as soon as classes are dismissed? There are always clubs, kids getting help after school, etc. I have no idea why this is an issue.

+1
I dont get this either; not a big deal.

Plus, I'm betting op's kid wont be the only kid waiting around to get picked up. She'll be in good company.

I posted in an earlier thread. My concern is the neighborhood the school is in. Is it relatively safe? If so, then sure. And if school gets out at 3 (as an example), by the time your child goes to the bathroom, goes to her locker, walks down the stairs to outside and speaks to friends, she won't be out there for a full 30 minutes, it would be about 15 or so. My other concern is do you have a plan for bad weather?

I think you can try it this week and at back to school night, find out if there are afterschool activities, tutoring help after school, homework club or library time that she could do.

If the school is in a sketchy neighborhood, then I wouldn't do it.

Anonymous wrote:Kids get nervous. Half an hour might be a very long time for a kid. Don't know, I probably wouldn't do it.

For a kid with a phone, a half hour will fly by. There really is no big deal here.

Although, what middle school completely locks up as soon as classes are dismissed? There are always clubs, kids getting help after school, etc. I have no idea why this is an issue.

I would be fine with my 5th grader sitting outside a school, on a covered bench, for 30 minutes each afternoon.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Kids get nervous. Half an hour might be a very long time for a kid. Don't know, I probably wouldn't do it.

Kids get nervous because they are never allowed to be alone and therefore never develop confidence in their own competency. Such a disservice, in my opinion.

I think it's fine and would not have her on speaker phone the whole time.

This. It’s really sad how people are freaked out by a teenager sitting alone in a public place for 30 minutes.

The fact that the public place in this case is a SCHOOL makes it even sadder.

Yes, I would be okay with this and wouldn't think twice about it. Once a week is totally fine. And no need to get on the phone with her while you are driving.

By fifth grade my son was heading home from school on his own, letting himself into the house, and hanging out until we got home a few hours later. Or he didn't go straight home, but hung with friends.

The school probably doesn't force her to stand outside on a bench. Wouldn't it be better if she spent the half hour somewhere where she wasn't wasting time?

I tend to be overprotective, but I'd be okay with it as long as:

1. Daughter has a phone.
2. In case of emergency, daughter could reenter the school and there would be somebody present who could help her.
3. There aren't any other factors that would present a forseeable problem.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Kids get nervous. Half an hour might be a very long time for a kid. Don't know, I probably wouldn't do it.

Kids get nervous because they are never allowed to be alone and therefore never develop confidence in their own competency. Such a disservice, in my opinion.

I think it's fine and would not have her on speaker phone the whole time.

This. It’s really sad how people are freaked out by a teenager sitting alone in a public place for 30 minutes.

Have after-school activities started up yet? Hopefully, there is a like a drama club, sports, or the like.

Does the school have a lobby she can stay in until you arrive? That’s how it would work in our school.