The only reason you want to tell the wife is so a) the relationship breaks up and you get him to yourself (you want to win), or b) you want the wife to hurt as badly as you do.

Don't pretend any other altruistic motive. This is about you.

Anonymous wrote:Later or sooner his wife will find out and come after you. Be prepared to have facial surgery and hair implants after the encounter.

Complete nonsense. Most affairs are never discovered and people go on living happily none the wiser

Move on with your life. You played with fire once and survived. Why are you trying to jump back into the flame?

Later or sooner his wife will find out and come after you. Be prepared to have facial surgery and hair implants after the encounter.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Long and short, I slept with a married man. Twice. It was a fling, he love-bombed me to bits, I called it off after a few weeks out of crippling guilt - we’ve gone no contact. He’s not a clever cheater - I know his real name, address, job, etc etc. I also have his wife’s information.

Now a dilemma: do I tell his wife? They’re mid-forties, married nearly twenty years, two teens. Established. That said, he mentioned that he’d cheated on her in the past and after much struggle they were able to stay married. I feel sorry for the woman, as I’m sure I’m not the only one. But maybe she doesn’t want to know.

WWYD?

troll fail

This.

Anonymous wrote:No you idiot. You’ll be responsible for the breakup of her family, her children’s pain, and this woman may even come after you. You are not a friend. You did a horrible thing and should back away slowly.

HE’s responsible for that. Her telling the wife is a consequence of his behavior. If he hadn’t stepped out, there would be nothing to blow up. He’s the common denominator.

No you idiot. You’ll be responsible for the breakup of her family, her children’s pain, and this woman may even come after you. You are not a friend. You did a horrible thing and should back away slowly.

Anonymous wrote:Does this mean you've learn your lesson? Married men are off limits, I mean what the heck, there are plenty of single ones. Why I never understand how someone can take the risk, STDs or their spouse comes after you.

OP I would anonymously apologize to her, tell her to get checked (you as well). Obviously he's done this all throughout the marriage. It's simply the right thing to do at this point, hopefully you are going to be a better person going forward.

It’s the right thing to do if you’re a psycho trying to blow up someone else’s life. Don’t be a bunny boiler. Walk away.

Does this mean you've learn your lesson? Married men are off limits, I mean what the heck, there are plenty of single ones. Why I never understand how someone can take the risk, STDs or their spouse comes after you.

OP I would anonymously apologize to her, tell her to get checked (you as well). Obviously he's done this all throughout the marriage. It's simply the right thing to do at this point, hopefully you are going to be a better person going forward.

Anonymous wrote:What I find strange is that the OP even wants to tell "the wife". There's a motive, here, she hasn't revealed.

OP, why tell his wife? What will you gain from this?

She clears her conscience at the expense of innocent wife and children.

Which is why of course you keep your mouth shut.

I was seeing a married man and for awhile had no idea. Truly don’t know what was going on at home because he stayed at my house multiple nights a week, was never on his phone, we were everywhere in public, etc.

When I found out and ended it I just went about my business. I had fun while it lasted. Whatever is going on in their world wasn’t my concern. On to the next without meddling in their marriage.

The truth is, there is no wrong answer here. Telling her or not saying anything at all is fair and decent. Maybe she knows he’s still out there or maybe she believes they’ve grown since the previous affair. One of the possible consequences of cheating is that your partner might find out. OP could have Bern a psycho stalker so he should have protected his family by concealing certain info.

I think you’re mostly hearing from women who’d prefer to not know if their husbands are cheating. I would.

No.

What I find strange is that the OP even wants to tell "the wife". There's a motive, here, she hasn't revealed.

OP, why tell his wife? What will you gain from this?

First, you Fd her husband. Now, you want to blow up her whole world? What kind of cruel person are you? And stop with the "I was love-bombed" bullshit. Leave the poor woman alone.