Anonymous
Post 08/28/2019 21:57     Subject: What does your AP relationship look like?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:It is short, intense bursts of time with somebody.

I want to share everything with him, but since I don't see him often, and we avoid an electronic trail, I have to save it all up. Sometimes I forget things, miss things. I want to share the books I'm reading with him. Or TV I'm watching. Or things I've thought about. The things I'm trying to work out. My work goals. My problem children.

We have to allot time for sex and for conversation, which cuts into both. Sometimes I see him and can't touch him or have sex with him. He's right there, but inaccessible. And he and I have fantastic chemistry, which is something I don't have with my husband.

Its very very limited in time - Like a tiny mini vacation when I see him, but also like a mini marriage. I know about his health concerns, his family issues, his work issues. But I don't know about his finances or have any of the work/family responsibilities. He knows all about my kids, but doesn't have any direct contact or responsibility. I'm not sure he could even identify them in a crowd. It's birthday and vacation sex that I want to have instead of sex that I feel required to have. It's, for me, knowing for the first time what real longing for another person is. I can be open with him and not expect to get judged as I would by my kids and husband. It is feeling alive and liking who I am with him.

I've never had an overnight with him. I'm sure he snores and steals the covers and is generally a bed hog since he's significantly taller than I am. We would have been a great couple, but circumstances are such that we aren't a couple at all. We exist on little mini dates that are all free of responsibility and care and are simply tiny vacations from reality.


This sums all three of mine, spread out over twenty years of marriage. Life is complicated.



How long have these affairs run?
Anonymous
Post 08/28/2019 21:11     Subject: What does your AP relationship look like?
Anonymous wrote:It is short, intense bursts of time with somebody.

I want to share everything with him, but since I don't see him often, and we avoid an electronic trail, I have to save it all up. Sometimes I forget things, miss things. I want to share the books I'm reading with him. Or TV I'm watching. Or things I've thought about. The things I'm trying to work out. My work goals. My problem children.

We have to allot time for sex and for conversation, which cuts into both. Sometimes I see him and can't touch him or have sex with him. He's right there, but inaccessible. And he and I have fantastic chemistry, which is something I don't have with my husband.

Its very very limited in time - Like a tiny mini vacation when I see him, but also like a mini marriage. I know about his health concerns, his family issues, his work issues. But I don't know about his finances or have any of the work/family responsibilities. He knows all about my kids, but doesn't have any direct contact or responsibility. I'm not sure he could even identify them in a crowd. It's birthday and vacation sex that I want to have instead of sex that I feel required to have. It's, for me, knowing for the first time what real longing for another person is. I can be open with him and not expect to get judged as I would by my kids and husband. It is feeling alive and liking who I am with him.

I've never had an overnight with him. I'm sure he snores and steals the covers and is generally a bed hog since he's significantly taller than I am. We would have been a great couple, but circumstances are such that we aren't a couple at all. We exist on little mini dates that are all free of responsibility and care and are simply tiny vacations from reality.


This sums all three of mine, spread out over twenty years of marriage. Life is complicated.
Anonymous
Post 08/28/2019 19:54     Subject: What does your AP relationship look like?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:It is short, intense bursts of time with somebody.

I want to share everything with him, but since I don't see him often, and we avoid an electronic trail, I have to save it all up. Sometimes I forget things, miss things. I want to share the books I'm reading with him. Or TV I'm watching. Or things I've thought about. The things I'm trying to work out. My work goals. My problem children.

We have to allot time for sex and for conversation, which cuts into both. Sometimes I see him and can't touch him or have sex with him. He's right there, but inaccessible. And he and I have fantastic chemistry, which is something I don't have with my husband.

Its very very limited in time - Like a tiny mini vacation when I see him, but also like a mini marriage. I know about his health concerns, his family issues, his work issues. But I don't know about his finances or have any of the work/family responsibilities. He knows all about my kids, but doesn't have any direct contact or responsibility. I'm not sure he could even identify them in a crowd. It's birthday and vacation sex that I want to have instead of sex that I feel required to have. It's, for me, knowing for the first time what real longing for another person is. I can be open with him and not expect to get judged as I would by my kids and husband. It is feeling alive and liking who I am with him.

I've never had an overnight with him. I'm sure he snores and steals the covers and is generally a bed hog since he's significantly taller than I am. We would have been a great couple, but circumstances are such that we aren't a couple at all. We exist on little mini dates that are all free of responsibility and care and are simply tiny vacations from reality.


You are a selfish and entitled brat. And a horrible mother and human being.


You beat me to the punch. Or she's a sociopath.


Wrong. She is actually a good mother. She is sacrificing her happiness to keep her family together. A selfish mother would have divorced . Do what you gotta donto survive and be there for your kids.


This.


Yes, but this is what made me think twice. She doesn't have to live with judgement in her "real" life, she shouldn't.
Anonymous
Post 08/28/2019 19:08     Subject: What does your AP relationship look like?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:It is short, intense bursts of time with somebody.

I want to share everything with him, but since I don't see him often, and we avoid an electronic trail, I have to save it all up. Sometimes I forget things, miss things. I want to share the books I'm reading with him. Or TV I'm watching. Or things I've thought about. The things I'm trying to work out. My work goals. My problem children.

We have to allot time for sex and for conversation, which cuts into both. Sometimes I see him and can't touch him or have sex with him. He's right there, but inaccessible. And he and I have fantastic chemistry, which is something I don't have with my husband.

Its very very limited in time - Like a tiny mini vacation when I see him, but also like a mini marriage. I know about his health concerns, his family issues, his work issues. But I don't know about his finances or have any of the work/family responsibilities. He knows all about my kids, but doesn't have any direct contact or responsibility. I'm not sure he could even identify them in a crowd. It's birthday and vacation sex that I want to have instead of sex that I feel required to have. It's, for me, knowing for the first time what real longing for another person is. I can be open with him and not expect to get judged as I would by my kids and husband. It is feeling alive and liking who I am with him.

I've never had an overnight with him. I'm sure he snores and steals the covers and is generally a bed hog since he's significantly taller than I am. We would have been a great couple, but circumstances are such that we aren't a couple at all. We exist on little mini dates that are all free of responsibility and care and are simply tiny vacations from reality.


You are a selfish and entitled brat. And a horrible mother and human being.


You beat me to the punch. Or she's a sociopath.


Wrong. She is actually a good mother. She is sacrificing her happiness to keep her family together. A selfish mother would have divorced . Do what you gotta donto survive and be there for your kids.


This.
Anonymous
Post 08/28/2019 18:52     Subject: What does your AP relationship look like?
Anonymous wrote:You beat me to the punch. Or she's a sociopath.


Damn it’s a lotta sociopaths out here.

According to the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy, national surveys indicate that 15 percent of married women and 25 percent of married men have had extramarital affairs. The incidence is about 20 percent higher when emotional and sexual relationships without intercourse are included. ~ Jan 22, 2018
Anonymous
Post 08/28/2019 18:28     Subject: What does your AP relationship look like?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:It is short, intense bursts of time with somebody.

I want to share everything with him, but since I don't see him often, and we avoid an electronic trail, I have to save it all up. Sometimes I forget things, miss things. I want to share the books I'm reading with him. Or TV I'm watching. Or things I've thought about. The things I'm trying to work out. My work goals. My problem children.

We have to allot time for sex and for conversation, which cuts into both. Sometimes I see him and can't touch him or have sex with him. He's right there, but inaccessible. And he and I have fantastic chemistry, which is something I don't have with my husband.

Its very very limited in time - Like a tiny mini vacation when I see him, but also like a mini marriage. I know about his health concerns, his family issues, his work issues. But I don't know about his finances or have any of the work/family responsibilities. He knows all about my kids, but doesn't have any direct contact or responsibility. I'm not sure he could even identify them in a crowd. It's birthday and vacation sex that I want to have instead of sex that I feel required to have. It's, for me, knowing for the first time what real longing for another person is. I can be open with him and not expect to get judged as I would by my kids and husband. It is feeling alive and liking who I am with him.

I've never had an overnight with him. I'm sure he snores and steals the covers and is generally a bed hog since he's significantly taller than I am. We would have been a great couple, but circumstances are such that we aren't a couple at all. We exist on little mini dates that are all free of responsibility and care and are simply tiny vacations from reality.


You are a selfish and entitled brat. And a horrible mother and human being.


You beat me to the punch. Or she's a sociopath.


Wrong. She is actually a good mother. She is sacrificing her happiness to keep her family together. A selfish mother would have divorced . Do what you gotta donto survive and be there for your kids.
Anonymous
Post 08/28/2019 18:25     Subject: What does your AP relationship look like?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:It is short, intense bursts of time with somebody.

I want to share everything with him, but since I don't see him often, and we avoid an electronic trail, I have to save it all up. Sometimes I forget things, miss things. I want to share the books I'm reading with him. Or TV I'm watching. Or things I've thought about. The things I'm trying to work out. My work goals. My problem children.

We have to allot time for sex and for conversation, which cuts into both. Sometimes I see him and can't touch him or have sex with him. He's right there, but inaccessible. And he and I have fantastic chemistry, which is something I don't have with my husband.

Its very very limited in time - Like a tiny mini vacation when I see him, but also like a mini marriage. I know about his health concerns, his family issues, his work issues. But I don't know about his finances or have any of the work/family responsibilities. He knows all about my kids, but doesn't have any direct contact or responsibility. I'm not sure he could even identify them in a crowd. It's birthday and vacation sex that I want to have instead of sex that I feel required to have. It's, for me, knowing for the first time what real longing for another person is. I can be open with him and not expect to get judged as I would by my kids and husband. It is feeling alive and liking who I am with him.

I've never had an overnight with him. I'm sure he snores and steals the covers and is generally a bed hog since he's significantly taller than I am. We would have been a great couple, but circumstances are such that we aren't a couple at all. We exist on little mini dates that are all free of responsibility and care and are simply tiny vacations from reality.


You would have been a great couple, why not divorce and be that great couple. What a waste of a life to be married to someone you dont like yourself around.


+1. What is stopping you from being together? Do you ever think about it?
Anonymous
Post 08/28/2019 17:35     Subject: What does your AP relationship look like?
Anonymous wrote:It is short, intense bursts of time with somebody.

I want to share everything with him, but since I don't see him often, and we avoid an electronic trail, I have to save it all up. Sometimes I forget things, miss things. I want to share the books I'm reading with him. Or TV I'm watching. Or things I've thought about. The things I'm trying to work out. My work goals. My problem children.

We have to allot time for sex and for conversation, which cuts into both. Sometimes I see him and can't touch him or have sex with him. He's right there, but inaccessible. And he and I have fantastic chemistry, which is something I don't have with my husband.

Its very very limited in time - Like a tiny mini vacation when I see him, but also like a mini marriage. I know about his health concerns, his family issues, his work issues. But I don't know about his finances or have any of the work/family responsibilities. He knows all about my kids, but doesn't have any direct contact or responsibility. I'm not sure he could even identify them in a crowd. It's birthday and vacation sex that I want to have instead of sex that I feel required to have. It's, for me, knowing for the first time what real longing for another person is. I can be open with him and not expect to get judged as I would by my kids and husband. It is feeling alive and liking who I am with him.

I've never had an overnight with him. I'm sure he snores and steals the covers and is generally a bed hog since he's significantly taller than I am. We would have been a great couple, but circumstances are such that we aren't a couple at all. We exist on little mini dates that are all free of responsibility and care and are simply tiny vacations from reality.


You would have been a great couple, why not divorce and be that great couple. What a waste of a life to be married to someone you dont like yourself around.
Anonymous
Post 08/28/2019 16:47     Subject: What does your AP relationship look like?
Anonymous wrote:It is short, intense bursts of time with somebody.

I want to share everything with him, but since I don't see him often, and we avoid an electronic trail, I have to save it all up. Sometimes I forget things, miss things. I want to share the books I'm reading with him. Or TV I'm watching. Or things I've thought about. The things I'm trying to work out. My work goals. My problem children.

We have to allot time for sex and for conversation, which cuts into both. Sometimes I see him and can't touch him or have sex with him. He's right there, but inaccessible. And he and I have fantastic chemistry, which is something I don't have with my husband.

Its very very limited in time - Like a tiny mini vacation when I see him, but also like a mini marriage. I know about his health concerns, his family issues, his work issues. But I don't know about his finances or have any of the work/family responsibilities. He knows all about my kids, but doesn't have any direct contact or responsibility. I'm not sure he could even identify them in a crowd. It's birthday and vacation sex that I want to have instead of sex that I feel required to have. It's, for me, knowing for the first time what real longing for another person is. I can be open with him and not expect to get judged as I would by my kids and husband. It is feeling alive and liking who I am with him.

I've never had an overnight with him. I'm sure he snores and steals the covers and is generally a bed hog since he's significantly taller than I am. We would have been a great couple, but circumstances are such that we aren't a couple at all. We exist on little mini dates that are all free of responsibility and care and are simply tiny vacations from reality.


This is beautiful. Thank you for your honesty.
Anonymous
Post 08/28/2019 16:15     Subject: What does your AP relationship look like?
My current husband left his wife after our affair got serious. We just couldn't live without each other anymore. It didn't feel good to be part of breaking up a marriage, but life happens. Their marriage was dead, she even admits they had nothing left. Constant arguing, to the point their son asked them to please stop fighting all the time. They had not had sex in over five years. That is just not sustainable ladies and gents. You can tell yourself sex doesn't matter, but it does. Intimacy is key to a strong marriage.

Flash forward five years, we have been married for two years and I have a great relationship with his ex wife. They have a child together so we all put him first. They are both so busy with work, that I tend to do all the school shuffling, packing lunches, etc. Our house is also home base for homework, etc., and yes, the kid calls me bonus mom.

I am sure I will still get the fury from some DCUM women, but I don't care. Not every story has the same ending. I am also living my best life....so.
Anonymous
Post 08/28/2019 16:14     Subject: What does your AP relationship look like?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP asked. I told. Don't read it if it is going to upset you. Really.


Yes but now is a good time to clean up your act.


Yes, your post reeks of a strong desire to help. Maybe you need to get that lap band...
Anonymous
Post 08/28/2019 16:07     Subject: What does your AP relationship look like?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP asked. I told. Don't read it if it is going to upset you. Really.

Bravo! You cannot please the entire DCUM kangaroo court. Every single person is different, their lives are different, and, meanwhile, the nasty posters hide behind anonymity. If this topic is so horrible, why are you reading it??


To judge others.
DUH!!
Anonymous
Post 08/28/2019 16:06     Subject: What does your AP relationship look like?
Anonymous wrote:OP asked. I told. Don't read it if it is going to upset you. Really.

Bravo! You cannot please the entire DCUM kangaroo court. Every single person is different, their lives are different, and, meanwhile, the nasty posters hide behind anonymity. If this topic is so horrible, why are you reading it??
Anonymous
Post 08/28/2019 15:55     Subject: Re:What does your AP relationship look like?
OP asked. I told. Don't read it if it is going to upset you. Really.


She is correct. Look at the title of the thread. You should have passed reading this one by if did not like the subject matter.

Yes but now is a good time to clean up your act.


Are you without sin (other than that of judging others)?
Anonymous
Post 08/28/2019 15:53     Subject: What does your AP relationship look like?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP asked. I told. Don't read it if it is going to upset you. Really.


Yes but now is a good time to clean up your act.

Of course it is. But name calling won't help that.