Why didn’t you just make a move instead of your weird comment?

Anonymous wrote:Do not chase him. Play it fun and cool, and put some effort in if you want to see him again, but don’t chase. Always assume things are fine until you two talk and decide things are not fine. Don’t make life complicated here- sounds like you’re overthinking.

As a lifelong over thinker, this is the #1 piece of relationship advice I would give any person in any relationship in any situation, after “always be yourself.”

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. He could have a girlfriend, but he’s not married. We hung out twice at his place, and I stayed the night at his place. I agree it was a little wrong to say that, but oh well. I was a little tipsy ( rarely drink), and I don’t sleep around, but I understand it’s hard for him to know that. He’s not religious or anything. He also has been very touchy since our first date. I did make a move after he laughed, but it’s not like I forced him. He’s the one that wanted to move from the couch to his bed, and we had sex multiple times last night. He kissed me this morning, but it was quick, and said he was “ too tired” for sex. I let because I had plans, and started to feel weird. He texted me “ How was breakfast” like an hour ago, but now I just feel weird.

It sounds like you’re acting just as weird as you perceive him to be. If you cancel your date tonight, you’re confirming an reservations he had. Maybe he wasn’t really ready for sex and he just went along because he was close to being ready and got caught up in the moment. Then he felt awkward I. The morning. Imagine how you’d like to be treated.

Sounds like she’s going to MeToo him in about six months.

You can argue that it’s overblown but that fear is animating many men these days even otherwise liberal ones. I’ve been a Democrat for 15 years and I still follow the Pence rule.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That was a skanky comment.

Indeed.

I do not agree. If you can't talk about sex ... And express what you want ... Nope.

You can do it in a way that doesn’t make you sound like you say that to every guy you meet. Have a little class.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That was a skanky comment.

Indeed.

I do not agree. If you can't talk about sex ... And express what you want ... Nope.

That’s definitely true, but it was was expressed in a way (“ so should we F”) that may not have been comfortable for this particular guy. Which just means he may not be the guy for OP.

He hadn’t made a move after many dates, despite being a sexual person. That was probably purposeful. OP could’ve just made a move to kiss him and let it evolve from there; that would’ve been following his cues. In this guy’s mind, maybe that kind of language early on puts changes the dynamic and now he’s pulling back emotionally. Who knows.

But again, that just may mean that there’s a mismatch. It could also just be a temporary bump that will smooth out. And of course, maybe this guy has issues with issues, or that Madonna/whore complex PP referenced.

All that being said,

Did you have to ask for multiple times or was the desire mutual?

Anonymous wrote:Do not chase him. Play it fun and cool, and put some effort in if you want to see him again, but don’t chase. Always assume things are fine until you two talk and decide things are not fine. Don’t make life complicated here- sounds like you’re overthinking.

Definitely this. You are way overthinking this. You had sex multiple times and you had to leave in the morning to be somewhere so if he didn't want sex in the morning I don't think that means much. Perhaps you were starting to act weird and he was responding to you.

Go out, relax, don't push things and see how it goes. If you still feel weird then stop dating.

Do not chase him. Play it fun and cool, and put some effort in if you want to see him again, but don’t chase. Always assume things are fine until you two talk and decide things are not fine. Don’t make life complicated here- sounds like you’re overthinking.

Anonymous wrote:He has the herp and doesn’t know how to tell you.

Or you are overweight and he is trying to reconcile that.

OP here. I doubt he has herpes, and I’m 5’1” 120lbs.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You had sex multiple times last night, he might need a few hours to recharge.

+1 He couldn’t get it up anymore. Just curious, how many times did you have sex?

OP here. We had sex three times.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sorry OP, but that comment was disgusting and low class. And he knew it.

You’re way uptight. She said it after several dates, not the first night. Women can express themselves too. If a man said that, no one would think it was low ass.

Assuming you mean low class, and uhhh, yeah they would. That would totally turn me off and I would think a guy who spoke like that had no class

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I mean, with a comment like that, you made it pretty clear why you were dating him. Why would you expect him to take you seriously as a relationship partner after that comment?

People can have sex and wants a serious relationship with the same partner. Most adults expect to have sex by 3-5 dates.

Yep.

He has the herp and doesn’t know how to tell you.

Or you are overweight and he is trying to reconcile that.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That was a skanky comment.

Indeed.

I do not agree. If you can't talk about sex ... And express what you want ... Nope.

Anonymous wrote:You had sex multiple times last night, he might need a few hours to recharge.

+1 He couldn’t get it up anymore. Just curious, how many times did you have sex?