Most of the rec teams don't get too crazy unless you're a winning team in the top division in the later elementary grades. Then you get some ridiculously hyper parents on the other teams.

Sounds like you’re already treading down the crazy town road of the very thing you’re asking about ironically! 3 is far too young for organized sports of any kind, good grief. As a PP mentioned, take swim lessons with your DC. That’s about it. Let DC run around on the playground with other littles.