Twice I have been so frustrated that I smack my kid (like on a clothed thigh in the car and once just lightly when she was next to me on the couch). That is it for more than 20 years. BUT, she was SO hurt, calling me a hypocrite because I always said (when she was growing up), "We don't hit in our family."

She took these instances really hard. I swear they were physically minor. I think upsetting to her because out of character for me. Hope this does not mar her memories of a very loving childhood, in which I was devoted to her.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am totally against spanking. I understand your emotional state and I would have screamed st my child and continued to yell all the way home. Then severe consequences like no screens at all for the next week.

Spanking really didn’t do anything but make you feel guilty. Feeling guilty probably has caused you to drop the issue.

Hey screamy mom.... that's not a good response. Your kids will block you out. "Oh mom's losing her shit again...."

No. Not if you get emotional and loud judiciously. It is far more effective than spanking.

If you are against spanking, you don’t say I’m against spanking but it’s ok in this situation. You may find it understandable, you might even do something you don’t believe in yourself, but you recognize it as an error and vow to do better. Sorry, but it’s not ok. It’s inderstandable that you were shocked and you reacted in the heat of the moment, but please don’t walk away thinking that it’s ok to spank because it was a shocking or dangerous situation.

I think it is so bizarre to consider hitting your child. Like people annoy me all the time but since they are adults I don't hit them. But I can hit my child when I get emotional or frustrated? Weird.

Anonymous wrote:I am totally against spanking. I understand your emotional state and I would have screamed st my child and continued to yell all the way home. Then severe consequences like no screens at all for the next week.

Spanking really didn’t do anything but make you feel guilty. Feeling guilty probably has caused you to drop the issue.

Screaming can be worse. We don't do either. Your post isn't helpful.

Anonymous wrote:I am a career nanny who is firmly opposed to physical punishment and you have my full support here! Goal number one is to keep your children safe. You reacted promptly and she responded well to that. Sounds like this is just one situation of many that are going to be a struggle for you. Remember that (in most scenarios) you do not need to react so quickly and you can think of a consequences that aligns with the unwanted behavior. Maybe you need to leash her up if she chooses not to listen again. And if you have other behaviors that you are trying to curb, you can always ask here for ideas. Stay strong and make sure you’re taking time for yourself too; parenting is hard!

Try being a parent. Far harder than being a nanny. You go home at night.

Anonymous wrote:In a situation like that, where she seriously could have been killed, I think a shocking/severe/swift punishment is appropriate. I bet she won't do it again! I would have done the same.

This. The one time I really hit my kid, was in the target parking garage when she also willingly ran off. I don’t app k but in that instance you gotta make a lasting impression.

Anonymous wrote:I am totally against spanking. I understand your emotional state and I would have screamed st my child and continued to yell all the way home. Then severe consequences like no screens at all for the next week.

Spanking really didn’t do anything but make you feel guilty. Feeling guilty probably has caused you to drop the issue.

You really think screaming is effective but you’re judging someone else for spanking in a dangerous situation? Lol

Yep, the only time I ever spanked was when my 2-y-o ran down the sidewalk and was headed out into the street. It was a swift butt smack and a stern talking to.

Anonymous wrote:I am totally against spanking. I understand your emotional state and I would have screamed st my child and continued to yell all the way home. Then severe consequences like no screens at all for the next week.

Spanking really didn’t do anything but make you feel guilty. Feeling guilty probably has caused you to drop the issue.

Hey screamy mom.... that's not a good response. Your kids will block you out. "Oh mom's losing her shit again...."

I am totally against spanking. I understand your emotional state and I would have screamed st my child and continued to yell all the way home. Then severe consequences like no screens at all for the next week.

Spanking really didn’t do anything but make you feel guilty. Feeling guilty probably has caused you to drop the issue.

I hope I would have the same reaction to this same situation! I feel like it would shock and horrify me so much that I might freeze in the consequence time.

My mom was a firm believer in not spamming. When I was about the same age, I ran out of the house and into the street. She gave me a spanking, and I never ran out in the road again. My moms jokes now that I’m probably too over cautious when it comes to crossing streets now.

Good job mom. You are keeping your kids safe.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Obviously an extreme situation. Not an optimal choice, but 100% understandable, and not a cause for concern. My 2 yo used to do this, so I got a parenting coach.

LOL man you're a sucker. You paid someone to coach you on how to parent your 2 year old? Ridiculous.

NP.. Man, this board is ridiculous. Don’t parent your kids, or exhibit what people consider “lazy” parenting, you get raked over the coals. Do something to help your parenting... you get raked over the coals.

Not everyone has had the upbringing, nor do they have the temperament to be great parents. Not every kid is a breath of fresh air, or compatible with your parenting style. I think a parenting coach like a PEP class, but someone able to address 1 on 1 the needs of the family. Why the f do you people think this is a bad thing? More parents should be able to identify and feel comfortable in seeking help if they have a need area.

Have we really reached rhe point where people feel the need to shame people accessing help for their families? Because I certainly know the converse is people shaming parents for not getting “enough” help.

I am a career nanny who is firmly opposed to physical punishment and you have my full support here! Goal number one is to keep your children safe. You reacted promptly and she responded well to that. Sounds like this is just one situation of many that are going to be a struggle for you. Remember that (in most scenarios) you do not need to react so quickly and you can think of a consequences that aligns with the unwanted behavior. Maybe you need to leash her up if she chooses not to listen again. And if you have other behaviors that you are trying to curb, you can always ask here for ideas. Stay strong and make sure you’re taking time for yourself too; parenting is hard!