Anonymous wrote:Send the pics to yourself so you have evidence before he deletes them. Don’t confront until you have more evidence, because if he’s cheating he will lie and minimize to protect himself. Check your cell phone records. Are there a lot of calls and texts to one number? Can you access his email? Does his phone have a password? Does he keep it with him all the time? Any messaging apps like WhatsApp or Kik? Is he deleting any text threads? You can find a lot of information about what to look for on talkaboutmarriage, chumplady or survivinginfidelity. Maybe he’s not cheating, but the pictures could mean otherwise.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You ask him. It's like ripping off a bandaid.

This

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow, OP you are getting the typical "divorce cheerleader" advice here from women who don't have to live your life when all is said and done.

Back up for a moment, is he a good husband and father? is this in character or out of it? Any changes in the relationship lately?

Yes, it's entirely possible he has naked pictures of another woman who he isn't physical with. I have received these a few times in my 20 year marriage - not saying it's appropriate but it's not that uncommon.

It's also possible it's not his boss, or it's his divorced friend who is sleeping with a hot woman and shared the picture. It's also possible it's his boss and he is having a full blown affair.

Rather than spend the best years of your life turning into an amateur detective, which may or may not reveal any definitive evidence, have a heart to heart with him. Tell him what you saw, ask for his explanation, make it clear that infidelity won't be tolerated and you would feel better if you had some transparency, i.e. access to his phone to reassure you. This all assumes you have an otherwise good marriage and sex life. If you don't, and are looking for a reason to split, then do it for other reasons.

OP already asked her husband about the pics and he is denying any such pics exist... if he won't even acknowledge the pics, I'm guessing transparency isn't gonna happen.

Anonymous wrote:Wow, OP you are getting the typical "divorce cheerleader" advice here from women who don't have to live your life when all is said and done.

Back up for a moment, is he a good husband and father? is this in character or out of it? Any changes in the relationship lately?

Yes, it's entirely possible he has naked pictures of another woman who he isn't physical with. I have received these a few times in my 20 year marriage - not saying it's appropriate but it's not that uncommon.

It's also possible it's not his boss, or it's his divorced friend who is sleeping with a hot woman and shared the picture. It's also possible it's his boss and he is having a full blown affair.

Rather than spend the best years of your life turning into an amateur detective, which may or may not reveal any definitive evidence, have a heart to heart with him. Tell him what you saw, ask for his explanation, make it clear that infidelity won't be tolerated and you would feel better if you had some transparency, i.e. access to his phone to reassure you. This all assumes you have an otherwise good marriage and sex life. If you don't, and are looking for a reason to split, then do it for other reasons.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I left the house at 5 am and have been at work since 6 am. My DH woke up and is denying there are any such pictures.

OP, please contact a close friend and let them help you navigate this mess. I understand why you wanted answers and wanted them asap but you need a clearer head making choices right now. Let a friend help you. If this turns out to be nothing more than nude pics he got from the internet that's one thing, if it's an affair you will be glad you let a friend help you make less emotional choices.

Anonymous wrote:I left the house at 5 am and have been at work since 6 am. My DH woke up and is denying there are any such pictures.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH here. ladies.

men will send other men (their freinds) pics of women. sometimes men will save pics on their phone of these women. because Damn. some women are very appealing to look at.

It doesn't mean that we don't find our wives attractive or desirable. Its just a a different woman to look at.

It's like going to a restaurant. Just because we like to look at the desert menu doesn't mean we will ever order food from it.

Do your friends ever say “Don’t send me that. It will cause problems with my wife.”?

Different man here, never in my life have I heard a man say this. If someone said this to me I would assume he was being sarcastic, unless he told me his wife has his password so please send it to me in my burner email.

Op, just confront him. You will be able to tell by his reaction. Worst case scenario it's his boss and perhaps you can nip this in the bud before it becomes physical.

Agree with others, it's the potential cheating that's the issue, not him looking at naked women

LOL, no way does he have nude pics of this woman if it's not already physical.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH here. ladies.

men will send other men (their freinds) pics of women. sometimes men will save pics on their phone of these women. because Damn. some women are very appealing to look at.

It doesn't mean that we don't find our wives attractive or desirable. Its just a a different woman to look at.

It's like going to a restaurant. Just because we like to look at the desert menu doesn't mean we will ever order food from it.

Do your friends ever say “Don’t send me that. It will cause problems with my wife.”?

Different man here, never in my life have I heard a man say this. If someone said this to me I would assume he was being sarcastic, unless he told me his wife has his password so please send it to me in my burner email.

Op, just confront him. You will be able to tell by his reaction. Worst case scenario it's his boss and perhaps you can nip this in the bud before it becomes physical.

Agree with others, it's the potential cheating that's the issue, not him looking at naked women

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH here. ladies.

men will send other men (their freinds) pics of women. sometimes men will save pics on their phone of these women. because Damn. some women are very appealing to look at.

It doesn't mean that we don't find our wives attractive or desirable. Its just a a different woman to look at.

It's like going to a restaurant. Just because we like to look at the desert menu doesn't mean we will ever order food from it.

Do your friends ever say “Don’t send me that. It will cause problems with my wife.”?

Different man here, never in my life have I heard a man say this. If someone said this to me I would assume he was being sarcastic, unless he told me his wife has his password so please send it to me in my burner email.

Op, just confront him. You will be able to tell by his reaction. Worst case scenario it's his boss and perhaps you can nip this in the bud before it becomes physical.

Agree with others, it's the potential cheating that's the issue, not him looking at naked women

OMG if it is his boss they are already having sex.
How many men out there send nude photos of women to their friends? How old are you? Can't you find your own naked women? Even 12 year olds know how to find naked pics on the web.

A middle aged blond is somebody this guy knows. I'm a middle aged blond and while I'm hot and in great shape for my age, I can't compete with a 22 year old in shape. I just can't. So, unless he knows her and wants her and is probably doing her, it probably isn't a picture somebody sent him.

Why, hello there. Don't be so hard on yourself. Look, share a pic of yourself and we'll give you honest feedback

Anonymous wrote:What do I do?

Anonymous wrote:What do I do?

Anonymous wrote:I left the house at 5 am and have been at work since 6 am. My DH woke up and is denying there are any such pictures.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH here. ladies.

men will send other men (their freinds) pics of women. sometimes men will save pics on their phone of these women. because Damn. some women are very appealing to look at.

It doesn't mean that we don't find our wives attractive or desirable. Its just a a different woman to look at.

It's like going to a restaurant. Just because we like to look at the desert menu doesn't mean we will ever order food from it.

Do your friends ever say “Don’t send me that. It will cause problems with my wife.”?

Different man here, never in my life have I heard a man say this. If someone said this to me I would assume he was being sarcastic, unless he told me his wife has his password so please send it to me in my burner email.

Op, just confront him. You will be able to tell by his reaction. Worst case scenario it's his boss and perhaps you can nip this in the bud before it becomes physical.

Agree with others, it's the potential cheating that's the issue, not him looking at naked women

OMG if it is his boss they are already having sex.
How many men out there send nude photos of women to their friends? How old are you? Can't you find your own naked women? Even 12 year olds know how to find naked pics on the web.

A middle aged blond is somebody this guy knows. I'm a middle aged blond and while I'm hot and in great shape for my age, I can't compete with a 22 year old in shape. I just can't. So, unless he knows her and wants her and is probably doing her, it probably isn't a picture somebody sent him.