My kids are teens now but they spent their childhood in our Northern Virginia suburban neighborhood riding their bikes to/from swim practice and over to their grandma's house. I took them to nature centers, met up with friends at rec centers, playgrounds and at home. We rode the train at Burke Lake and walked the trails around Accotink Lake and Burke Lake. They participated in our neighborhood 4th of July parade and we set off fireworks with neighbors in their driveway. I felt very lucky to have so many fun things to do all within a walk or reasonable drive from our house.

Your 3 year old is still very young. At that age I was doing Mommy and Me classes at the rec center, story time at the library and VBS during summer break. When school started up my kids went to preschool a couple of mornings a week and we met friends to play at fun places afterwards. Once they get to Kindergarten, their social life expands even more. Be patient, Op.

It makes me really sad too, OP. So much so that we're hoping to move back to upstate NY in the next five years or so. It's not just the transient nature of this area - it's the constant Keeping Up and the competitive insanity of so many of us Type A DCers. I'm over it and I don't want that kind of anxiety for my children.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just spent a few weeks visiting family in the suburbs. It's great for like a few days and then you realize it's really just a lot of hanging around the house or shopping at strip malls.

If you have a family and two jobs, no matter where you live, most of your weekend and evening time is spent the same way - cleaning, cooking, doing laundry, running errands (yes, sometimes at strip malls) and hanging out with your kids. this topic of debate is endlessly stupid.

Nope it’s true. My sister-in-law’s family lives in NoVA and has 2 kids. It’s going to the movies, going to the mall, watching TV or movies at home, having the kids friends over to the house, and rec sport. Her son is 1 year older than our son.

Our weekends are kids programming at the Smithsonians (art, music), concerts on the river, festivals in the city, children’s theater, etc.. The only similarity is both boys are in a soccer rec league.

And our weekends are swimming at the pool, tennis or Pickleball, kids play golf with grandparents, festivals where ever we feel like going, volunteer work, pick your own ____, concerts in Fairfax City, Herndon, Wolf Trap, where ever, meals with friends and family, etc. When we had little kids, we spent a good deal of time in our local parks - Burke Lake Park, Clemyjontri, Great Falls, etc. If we didn’t feel like a big park, we went to one of the dozen or so smaller pocket parks around us. Since my office is a 10 minute drive from home and my husband’s 30 minutes from home in bad traffic, it doesn’t make sense to live further away. One can be just as active and engaged with their community and surroundings in the suburbs as in the city.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just spent a few weeks visiting family in the suburbs. It's great for like a few days and then you realize it's really just a lot of hanging around the house or shopping at strip malls.

If you have a family and two jobs, no matter where you live, most of your weekend and evening time is spent the same way - cleaning, cooking, doing laundry, running errands (yes, sometimes at strip malls) and hanging out with your kids. this topic of debate is endlessly stupid.

Nope it’s true. My sister-in-law’s family lives in NoVA and has 2 kids. It’s going to the movies, going to the mall, watching TV or movies at home, having the kids friends over to the house, and rec sport. Her son is 1 year older than our son.

Our weekends are kids programming at the Smithsonians (art, music), concerts on the river, festivals in the city, children’s theater, etc.. The only similarity is both boys are in a soccer rec league.

I miss summers back before it was as hot as the sun. Climate change is making everything miserable.

I grew up here in the Northern Virginia suburbs. We roamed the neighborhood, went to the pool, rode bikes, and generally had a very 1980s childhood. The boy down the street constantly sexually harassed us. The mother of one of my friends screamed at us if we came near their yard. Another mom did not allow her kids to play with anyone she deemed “less than” which meant anyone not a member of their church. One of my friends brothers spread rumors about me and other kids in the neighborhood just because the attention he got was fun. When we vacationed, it was in a small town where our family is from that has been economically depressed since the Coolidge administration. By the time I was 15, most of the girls in the town were having their second children. But there was a beautiful beach. So yeah it was “idyllic” but it had its drawbacks. My kid spends several weeks at a sleepaway camp she loves. We go on vacation and she plays a fall sport so she starts back to school earlier than most. Her summers are *way* better.

Anonymous wrote:I just spent a few weeks visiting family in the suburbs. It's great for like a few days and then you realize it's really just a lot of hanging around the house or shopping at strip malls.

If you have a family and two jobs, no matter where you live, most of your weekend and evening time is spent the same way - cleaning, cooking, doing laundry, running errands (yes, sometimes at strip malls) and hanging out with your kids. this topic of debate is endlessly stupid.

I just spent a few weeks visiting family in the suburbs. It's great for like a few days and then you realize it's really just a lot of hanging around the house or shopping at strip malls.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My child is having a childhood so much better than I had growing up in the city. He is exposed to so many different cultures and people. He has been enriched with so much culture with art, music, theater is his short time so far. He doesn’t have to get in a car just to go somewhere and we just walked down the street today to catch dinner and get a water ice afterwards. He is knowledgeable about the world and not just just where he lives or the country he lives in.

He loves riding his bike at the park that we live 3 houses down from. Even better, he loves the water park there during the summer. He loves his school where there are children of all color and class. He likes being in a soccer league with his friends and classmates from school. He has fun camps in the summer. He gets to travel to other states and countries for vacation.

His childhood is so much better than mine growing up in suburbia and I’m glad for it.

You will want to move to the burbs when he becomes a teen and he has a longer leash and you have to worry about him getting jumped, robbed or corrupted by his fellow students.

Right, because kids in the suburbs never find themsrlves in trouble

I wish some families were a little more transient

Anonymous wrote:My child is having a childhood so much better than I had growing up in the city. He is exposed to so many different cultures and people. He has been enriched with so much culture with art, music, theater is his short time so far. He doesn’t have to get in a car just to go somewhere and we just walked down the street today to catch dinner and get a water ice afterwards. He is knowledgeable about the world and not just just where he lives or the country he lives in.

He loves riding his bike at the park that we live 3 houses down from. Even better, he loves the water park there during the summer. He loves his school where there are children of all color and class. He likes being in a soccer league with his friends and classmates from school. He has fun camps in the summer. He gets to travel to other states and countries for vacation.

His childhood is so much better than mine growing up in suburbia and I’m glad for it.

You will want to move to the burbs when he becomes a teen and he has a longer leash and you have to worry about him getting jumped, robbed or corrupted by his fellow students.

I had a Midwestern upbringing and we had a lot of freedom to roam, and we had to be home when the street lights came on, ice cream man jingle in the distance. Our parents had no clue of all the dangerous stuff we were doing or the places we went or that we smoked pot and drank with the older kids. Oh the good 'ole days....

My kids spent the summer at camp and swimming at the country club and never knew what they missed.

I know people wax poetic about growing up with the same friends since age 5 but reality is — are you friends with 99% of them now, beyond Facebook? Little kid “friendships” don’t even last into middle or high school let alone adulthood — they’re based on convenience — having someone/anyone to play with; living on the same street; moms are friends etc. The friendships that can last are the ones the kids choose — that happens later, usually age 10+. I never understand all the heartache when a 3 year olds BFF moves away. They’ll make a new BFF next week.

It becomes less transient by the time kids hit elementary and almost not transient at all by 6th grade as families then commit to staying thru high school. So while your kids may not have friends going back to age 5, they most certainly can/will have friends going back to age 10-11, so that solves any best man, groomsmen/bridesmaid issues a few decades from now.

My child is having a childhood so much better than I had growing up in the city. He is exposed to so many different cultures and people. He has been enriched with so much culture with art, music, theater is his short time so far. He doesn’t have to get in a car just to go somewhere and we just walked down the street today to catch dinner and get a water ice afterwards. He is knowledgeable about the world and not just just where he lives or the country he lives in.

He loves riding his bike at the park that we live 3 houses down from. Even better, he loves the water park there during the summer. He loves his school where there are children of all color and class. He likes being in a soccer league with his friends and classmates from school. He has fun camps in the summer. He gets to travel to other states and countries for vacation.

His childhood is so much better than mine growing up in suburbia and I’m glad for it.