Anonymous wrote:Y'all got a lotta time on your hands wondering about some off the wall stuff.

Which is worse having a leg gnarled off at the knee by an alligator or having Dick Cheney shoot your leg off at the knee with a shotgun?

Anonymous wrote:As someone who is in his shoes, I fault the guy tremendously for participating in that article, which clearly accomplishes nothing but cause his ex more pain and embarrassment. I also believe that the guy’s decision to put his kids in a conservative Christian school and allowing them to be raised thinking the way they did was unforgivable.

Having said that, the reactions of many of the women on this thread to the article confirms my decision never, ever to come out at this point. With each passing day one becomes more and more boxed into what was a stupid decision made years ago - while young, hopeful, and naive - but certainly was not a decision made maliciously or with any intent to hurt or mislead.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As someone who is in his shoes, I fault the guy tremendously for participating in that article, which clearly accomplishes nothing but cause his ex more pain and embarrassment. I also believe that the guy’s decision to put his kids in a conservative Christian school and allowing them to be raised thinking the way they did was unforgivable.

Having said that, the reactions of many of the women on this thread to the article confirms my decision never, ever to come out at this point. With each passing day one becomes more and more boxed into what was a stupid decision made years ago - while young, hopeful, and naive - but certainly was not a decision made maliciously or with any intent to hurt or mislead.

The women are reacting to being left to parent children alone. You are not ready to accept the consequences of your actions. You chose to get married.

And there has only been one negative response to him coming out. I am from Detroit and there is enough space, and a large enough community there (and here) for him to find a new life. Do not blame your decision to remain in the closet in a marriage on our responses. Repeat, you do not leave your kids. He could have moved away for a few months to clear his head and then move back.

That is a very negative stereotype. If that is what his guilty compromise in with the custody arrangements, I can understand that. Gay men are excellent fathers who are active, positive role models for all children. Again, do not leave your kids!

Why didn't he choose to take the boys with him?

Because the gay scene isn’t the proper place for mid-teen boys?

I mean the husband already had a live-in boyfriend. Doubt mom would be interested in that living arrangement. If you read the article he gets hotels for the weekends with them.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As someone who is in his shoes, I fault the guy tremendously for participating in that article, which clearly accomplishes nothing but cause his ex more pain and embarrassment. I also believe that the guy’s decision to put his kids in a conservative Christian school and allowing them to be raised thinking the way they did was unforgivable.

Having said that, the reactions of many of the women on this thread to the article confirms my decision never, ever to come out at this point. With each passing day one becomes more and more boxed into what was a stupid decision made years ago - while young, hopeful, and naive - but certainly was not a decision made maliciously or with any intent to hurt or mislead.

The women are reacting to being left to parent children alone. You are not ready to accept the consequences of your actions. You chose to get married.

And there has only been one negative response to him coming out. I am from Detroit and there is enough space, and a large enough community there (and here) for him to find a new life. Do not blame your decision to remain in the closet in a marriage on our responses. Repeat, you do not leave your kids. He could have moved away for a few months to clear his head and then move back.

Why didn't he choose to take the boys with him?

Anonymous wrote:Worse if husband was gay. Your ENTIRE marriage has been a sham. I would feel like a total joke.

At least if they just cheated with another woman, there was a possibility that they truly were in love with you at the start of the marriage.

Anonymous wrote:As someone who is in his shoes, I fault the guy tremendously for participating in that article, which clearly accomplishes nothing but cause his ex more pain and embarrassment. I also believe that the guy’s decision to put his kids in a conservative Christian school and allowing them to be raised thinking the way they did was unforgivable.

Having said that, the reactions of many of the women on this thread to the article confirms my decision never, ever to come out at this point. With each passing day one becomes more and more boxed into what was a stupid decision made years ago - while young, hopeful, and naive - but certainly was not a decision made maliciously or with any intent to hurt or mislead.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As someone who is in his shoes, I fault the guy tremendously for participating in that article, which clearly accomplishes nothing but cause his ex more pain and embarrassment. I also believe that the guy’s decision to put his kids in a conservative Christian school and allowing them to be raised thinking the way they did was unforgivable.

Having said that, the reactions of many of the women on this thread to the article confirms my decision never, ever to come out at this point. With each passing day one becomes more and more boxed into what was a stupid decision made years ago - while young, hopeful, and naive - but certainly was not a decision made maliciously or with any intent to hurt or mislead.

The women are reacting to being left to parent children alone. You are not ready to accept the consequences of your actions. You chose to get married.

Anonymous wrote:As someone who is in his shoes, I fault the guy tremendously for participating in that article, which clearly accomplishes nothing but cause his ex more pain and embarrassment. I also believe that the guy’s decision to put his kids in a conservative Christian school and allowing them to be raised thinking the way they did was unforgivable.

Having said that, the reactions of many of the women on this thread to the article confirms my decision never, ever to come out at this point. With each passing day one becomes more and more boxed into what was a stupid decision made years ago - while young, hopeful, and naive - but certainly was not a decision made maliciously or with any intent to hurt or mislead.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He came out at 42, so soon enough to live his life fully and enjoy his youth. But too far into a marriage to not have it devastate someone else.

"I was 42 years old when I came out to my wife. It was 15 months later that I started that same conversation with my three boys -- 9-year-old twins and an 11-year-old.

The whole experience is somewhat of a blur, mostly in part to the fact that at that point in my life there was a lot of change happening and some significant pent-up emotions. There wasn't much of a plan, no guidebook in hand, only goals that I hoped my boys would start the process of understanding and accepting their dad for whom I truly was: a gay man.

...

When the moment to break the news to my kids finally came, I had a lot of issues to navigate. Over 15 months, I had finalized the divorce, moved again and taken a new job based in Chicago, 250 miles away from my boys. The distance was to create some space between my now ex-wife, who struggled being in proximity to me."

I think his reason for moving is bogus. Of course his wife struggled- he didn't give her time to come to terms with it before he left and then she was left holding down the fort and dealing with the implosion of her marriage. They were already in a large enough metro area to get some space. I think he needs to look at his real motivations for abandoning his children in a time of crisis.

Anonymous wrote:As someone who is in his shoes, I fault the guy tremendously for participating in that article, which clearly accomplishes nothing but cause his ex more pain and embarrassment. I also believe that the guy’s decision to put his kids in a conservative Christian school and allowing them to be raised thinking the way they did was unforgivable.

Having said that, the reactions of many of the women on this thread to the article confirms my decision never, ever to come out at this point. With each passing day one becomes more and more boxed into what was a stupid decision made years ago - while young, hopeful, and naive - but certainly was not a decision made maliciously or with any intent to hurt or mislead.