Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Last name till adult says otherwise in less they are close friends of ours and then first name. Ms. First name is more a Southern thing. No its not confusing to have different last names. We do.

ugh, this just reminded me how much it sucks when wives don't take their husbands names

How much DOES it suck when wives don't take their husbands' names, PP? Tell us all about it.

Signed,

Didn't take his last name and he gave our children MY last name because it's cooler than his

Agreed. "Betamale" would be an uncool last name.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Last name till adult says otherwise in less they are close friends of ours and then first name. Ms. First name is more a Southern thing. No its not confusing to have different last names. We do.

ugh, this just reminded me how much it sucks when wives don't take their husbands names

Right? They also want to be able to vote and have their own credit cards!

100% of the people who voted for women's right to vote were ... men. You're welcome. The credit cards were a bad idea though.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DH grew up saying Mr./Mrs./Ms. First Name, and that how he taught DD. I actually grew up calling adults by their first names.

That’s such an odd formulation.....where do he grow up, the Deep South?

Yes.

DP here: I’m from Baltimore, but I don’t know AAs from anywhere except the West Coast who were comfortable with their children calling adults by First Name only. I’m 47 and I still call senior citizens Mr/Miz First Name.

Mr./Mrs./Ms. last name for people were aren’t close with.

Mr./Mrs./Ms. first name for AA, Latino, and Southern White adults they know well because that’s what these adults want.

First name for non-Southern white and Asian adults they know well because that is that these adults want.

I ask the person

I'm from the West Coast. We just call everyone by their first names. If you called someone "Ms. Mary" they would look at you funny. It's just Mary!

Anonymous wrote:women whose kids have different last names, when you are addressed as mrs. child's name, do you correct them or just ignore it and continue the conversation normally?

You know technically , mrs. Husband’s last name is always correct, whether you changed your name or not. You are your husband’s misses ( if that’s your coupling status). Ms. was introduced to preserve maiden names, for whatever reason.

I use my maiden name professionally, but expect to be called mrs. Child’slastName at home, and don’t correct.

Mr./Mrs Last Name

I cannot stand being called Ms. First Name

Just by the first name.

Anonymous wrote:I was taught to ask how people (mostly friends parents) how they would like to be addressed, then was happy to use whatever they wanted. My mom had kept her maiden name so she was probably sensitive to this since she always got Mrs. NotHerName. She would correct in that she would usually say, "call me Larla!" when kids did it. For adults, I think she would let it go the first time or maybe reintroduce herself with proper name. "This is Dr. and Mrs. HisLastName" Mom-"Nice to meet you, Larla HerName."

Yep. My kid addresses different adults differently. We ask the preference or default to Mr and Mrs Last Name and use whatever correction is usually provided. I think we are surrounded by rather casual people because most go by first names only.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DH grew up saying Mr./Mrs./Ms. First Name, and that how he taught DD. I actually grew up calling adults by their first names.

That’s such an odd formulation.....where do he grow up, the Deep South?

Yes.

I was taught to ask how people (mostly friends parents) how they would like to be addressed, then was happy to use whatever they wanted. My mom had kept her maiden name so she was probably sensitive to this since she always got Mrs. NotHerName. She would correct in that she would usually say, "call me Larla!" when kids did it. For adults, I think she would let it go the first time or maybe reintroduce herself with proper name. "This is Dr. and Mrs. HisLastName" Mom-"Nice to meet you, Larla HerName."

Mrs/Mr. First Name. I'm from New Orleans and grew up this way. I still have a hard time calling women my mom's age by their first name without Mrs. in front!

Anonymous wrote:I teach my kids to call adults Mr. or Ms. (or Miss or Mrs.) Last Name. My kids are in their older teens now, and they've always been taught that, even at age 3.

I've found that a lot of kids call me Ms. First Name; this is on their own, I don't invite them. It bothers me, and it gives me the impression that their parents are doing a terrible job in raising them, but I don't correct them. It's not my place to teach them manners.

Is there just one right way in your opinion of having manners that are correct on this matter?

Or maybe the parents have different assumptions than you do when it comes to the way that children and adults interact, and / or those values manifest themselves differently.

The whole point of this thread isn't there's one right way.

Kids use Ms/Mr. FirstName for private music teachers and close family friends. Music teachers all introduced themselves with first names only, but the Southern part of me doesn't feel comfortable with that so we compromised.

Pretty much everyone else is Mr/Ms Last Name.