Anonymous wrote:I would not miss Christmas with my child for any reason. You only get so many of those moments. My DH is still angry that many many years ago when DD was 1 I didn't wake him up when she woke up and she saw the stockings and presents from Santa without him. The people that say you can celebrate any day you want are right but you and your wife will know its Christmas and that you're not together.

I am mad at you for that on behalf of your husband - yikes. That is really bad.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do not think my wife cares that much about being together on the actual day of Christmas! The obvious choice would have been to make the sacrifices necessary to do the travel if we all wanted to be together on Christmas day, right?

You appear to believe that the only possible sacrifice here is her sacrificing her needs/wants to follow through on your plan. But you could also sacrifice this trip - why is that not on your list of possibilities?

It is a rare/special get together on this side of the family. We live close to her family and we see them for every holiday of the year.

Anonymous wrote:I do not think my wife cares that much about being together on the actual day of Christmas! The obvious choice would have been to make the sacrifices necessary to do the travel if we all wanted to be together on Christmas day, right?

You appear to believe that the only possible sacrifice here is her sacrificing her needs/wants to follow through on your plan. But you could also sacrifice this trip - why is that not on your list of possibilities?

I would not miss Christmas with my child for any reason. You only get so many of those moments. My DH is still angry that many many years ago when DD was 1 I didn't wake him up when she woke up and she saw the stockings and presents from Santa without him. The people that say you can celebrate any day you want are right but you and your wife will know its Christmas and that you're not together.

Anonymous wrote:Just keep your plan the way it is. You’ll be able to spend a wonderful holiday with your extended family without having to accommodate a baby’s needs and schedule. Your wife can relax at home with the baby and celebrate Christmas with her family. You can Skype every day.

Haha yeah, the truth is that you will have much more fun at the family reunion if you don't have to take care of a toddler. Enjoy it! Maybe put on a pretend sad face for your wife though.

Well, a change fee alone is a decent amount, but then the difference in the cost of the flight will be huge if you add in the price rise in general plus the cost of a more desirable return flight date.

Anonymous wrote:Just keep your plan the way it is. You’ll be able to spend a wonderful holiday with your extended family without having to accommodate a baby’s needs and schedule. Your wife can relax at home with the baby and celebrate Christmas with her family. You can Skype every day.

The obvious solution is for him to shorten his trip. Why does he have to be gone a full week? Paying a change fee will be cheaper than buying a whole new flight for his wife - and way more convenient!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP where will your wife be for Christmas? Does she have family? I would really enjoy a Christmas by myself with my family if I had the option. Traveling over Christmas is a special hell, especially with a baby (it's not the airplane I hate, it's sleeping in weird places and the fact that my kids don't sleep well in other houses). Is there tension between your wife and your parents?

She will be with her family - parents, brother, SIL, niece, etc. That is a big reason why she probably is fine with the idea.

She may be fine with it but when she shows up on Christmas Day without you her parents, brother, SIL, niece will trash you!

Don’t be silly. They’ll understand that it is a big family reunion and be glad she is home with them for the holidays.

Just keep your plan the way it is. You’ll be able to spend a wonderful holiday with your extended family without having to accommodate a baby’s needs and schedule. Your wife can relax at home with the baby and celebrate Christmas with her family. You can Skype every day.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP where will your wife be for Christmas? Does she have family? I would really enjoy a Christmas by myself with my family if I had the option. Traveling over Christmas is a special hell, especially with a baby (it's not the airplane I hate, it's sleeping in weird places and the fact that my kids don't sleep well in other houses). Is there tension between your wife and your parents?

She will be with her family - parents, brother, SIL, niece, etc. That is a big reason why she probably is fine with the idea.

She may be fine with it but when she shows up on Christmas Day without you her parents, brother, SIL, niece will trash you!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Take your wife and baby! I think you'll all regret not being together, particularly at a big family gathering where all will be keen to meet your daughter. We started traveling overseas when our DD was 1 and it's really not so bad.

+1 - traveling with infants is not a walk in the park, but it's manageable. People love to exaggerate. I've moved internationally 5 times and my kids have ranged in age from infant to 8 years and I have exactly horrendous travel memory - and it's not even the memory of my toddler vomiting all over me.

I've traveled with my baby alone. People do it all the time.

That should have been exactly ONE horrendous travel memory. And it's still not the vomit one.

As far as all the extra stuff, sleep disruption, etc. Yeah, it's a pain, but not insurmountable. You can send some stuff ahead by mail and mail it back if you need to. A relative will probably have a pack and play, or the hotel will. Either get a stroller that accommodates the car seat (which you'll want on the plan) or get an Ergo and carry the car seat. I mean, baby food comes in squeezable pouches now - and if you're going somewhere in the States, diapers and baby food are widely available.

Anonymous wrote:Take your wife and baby! I think you'll all regret not being together, particularly at a big family gathering where all will be keen to meet your daughter. We started traveling overseas when our DD was 1 and it's really not so bad.

+1 - traveling with infants is not a walk in the park, but it's manageable. People love to exaggerate. I've moved internationally 5 times and my kids have ranged in age from infant to 8 years and I have exactly horrendous travel memory - and it's not even the memory of my toddler vomiting all over me.

I've traveled with my baby alone. People do it all the time.

jeff, can you delete these posts about how hard it is to travel with a baby?? don't want my wife to see them!!

(just kidding - those are good points..)

I found that the worst ages for travel were 9-18 months. No question. Travelling with a baby that age means packing a ton of stuff (more of a hassle if you're flying), and dealing with a kid who's old enough to be and want to be mobile in an environment where she has to sit in the same place for hours. There's also the fact that holiday travel is generally busy, weather-related delays or cancellations are more likely, and missing a flight or spending several extra hours at the airport is that much more of a pain with a baby. And travel exposes you to new germs.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn't miss my kid's first Christmas. Travelling with a baby isn't super hard. I'd go with the whole family and have a great time.

This is my hope. To the posters who say traveling with a baby is so bad.. what do you mean exactly?

We are going to travel with a baby next month and maybe we can see how it goes and rethink our Christmas plans based on that. The only difference would be colder/icier/snowier conditions and maybe worse flights in terms of timing.

Really?

Consider what all you'd need to pack for the baby.

Consider that everything will take longer in terms of getting to and through the airport.

Consider that your child's sleep will be disrupted, which means your sleep will be disrupted, which will affect all three of you.

And, finally, consider the significant likelihood that any or all of you will be sick thanks to daycare germs. I can't tell you how many times we've been sick either during a trip or when family comes to visit.

That's what makes it hard. That doesn't mean you shouldn't do it, but you shouldn't make your decision without thinking about those things.