We make a lot of "base dishes" in batch on the weekend and augment with other things throughout the week. Some examples:

plain penne pasta, which can be dressed up with different jarred sauces, steamed veggies (I almost exclusively buy frozen if I plan on steaming them), frozen chicken sausage from Trader Joe's, etc.

white rice, similarly dressed up with egg and avocado, steamed veggies, canned beans, fresh salmon filet (cooks up really quickly), etc

We also admittedly do a lot of very casual pb&j, bowls of oatmeal, egg omelets, etc for my kids.

DH and I are pretty easy about dinner for ourselves, if we're not eating all together as a family. He and I are almost always happy with a baguette and olive oil and tomatoes, or easy sandwiches, cereal, etc. I grew up with regular big home cooked family dinners but I had a SAHM.

Anonymous wrote:The first year after having your second should involve low expectations re: dinner. A lot of nights were: rotisserie chicken and prepackaged salad; doctored up instant ramen; Costco premade meals, etc. Also a lot of Uber eats.

I work from home a lot, so sometimes I do a little prep before picking up the kids. Sometimes we make pizza (premised crust) as a family, which my 3 year old loves. Sometimes we end up just feeding the kids something easy like mac n cheese and then DH and I make a real grown up dinner after they’re asleep (toddler is asleep by 7-ish and 4 y/o goes down at 8).

It really varies each week based on work schedules, whether one of us is going to the gym or has other plans out, etc.

I’m intrigued by your doctored up ramen! What do you add?

I do very low-key meals on days I go into the office. I also get home no later than 6, so can easily have something on the table in 20 minutes if I plan right. Breakfast for dinner is popular with us. We make family dinners a priority and always have; part of that meant choosing jobs that afford telework and reasonable hours so we aren't stressed to the max making it happen. I know we're lucky to have those options, but we also took them and the trade-offs they come with.

I don't, my husband is the chef. We have always done the divide and conquer. He cooks while I tend to kid stuff, then I clean up while he finishes up kids stuff.

Are your kids eating dinner at childcare? I only ask because this would change how I would do things. Currently, during the week, we do a mix of heating left overs from the weekend, quick and easy meals like pasta with trader joe's meatballs and whatever frozen vegetable we have, stir fry vegetables with pre-made rice (rice keeps really well in the refrigerator) and a protein that is ready to heat (already made chicken meatballs, or just left over rotisserie chicken). We also always have a fresh fruit (shopped for over the weekend) because we eat with our 2 year old before she goes to bed.

At 10 and 12 my kids started making the dinner.

We get home a little earlier than you, and we have low expectations for meals.

Both of us are home some time between 5:30 and 6:00. Whoever gets home first starts cooking. We eat really simple stuff, like others have mentioned.

I buy the large marinated meat packs from Wegmans (chicken, pork, steak) and grill them on the forman. Or ground turkey or beef and make small hamburgers. Sometimes will sautee fish or sausages to mix up the protein.

Sides are frozen veggies, or sliced veggies, and a piece of fruit.

Will add a grain or a bread on the side as needed.

Occasionally dinner is sandwiches and smoothies or chicken nuggets and sliced apples, or scrambled eggs and toast, and that is okay.

If you have the flexibility to get home even 15 minutes earlier, you might find this routine more doable.

I cook Sunday, Monday, Tuesday.

Monday: I prepare the food on Sunday for a crockpot put it on before i leave.
Tuesday: I marinade chicken on Sunday, grill when I get home 10 minute cook time. Reheat rice from sunday and eat salad or raw veggies (Alternate... get a rotisserie chicen)... or make tacos with chicken meat

Wednesday: we bring food in
Thursday: Leftovers or kids choice... nuggets, mac and cheese... this is our night kids get to be kids.

Friday and Saturday: Depends... eat out, bring it in, go to friends, it just depends what is going on.

We keep it easy. I used to get home slightly later, so my husband would start dinner; now that I get home slightly earlier, I start.

Our meals are things like:
*cooker or pressure cooker meals
*a quick pasta dish like carbonara or amatriciana, where the sauce is prepared while the pasta is cooking
*broiled fish and steamed veggies
*grilled pork chops (indoor grill like a George Foreman) and roasted veggies
*rotisserie chicken and salad
*omelets (tres Francais!)

I use my rice cooker and instant pot (as both a pressure cooker and a slow cooker) a lot. I will cut veggies or start a marinade the night before. I make big batches of sauces, like bolognese or sauce for chana punjabi, in advance and freeze. If I can't make it in 30 minutes or less (better if it's 15-20), it's not a weeknight meal. I have a handful of go-to recipes, many of which I can cook from memory, so it's even faster. We do takeout once a week or less, but when the kids were littler, we did it once or twice a week.

We have always eaten as a family. If you really have little time in the evenings, start making more slow cooker meals that are ready to eat when you walk in the door.

Anonymous wrote:So you get less than an hour with kids at night.

When I worked, I didn’t cook dinner. I often missed bedtime. My mom or nanny cooked and/or fed kids depending on the year.

The few months we tried to do daycare solo, we ate a lot of prepared meals and take out/delivery.

I now stay home and DH also cut his hours. He grilled tonight. We may get pizza tomorrow.

This is...not helpful at all. OP, your only solution is to quit your job./s

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This kind of post is exactly why men objected when women said they could do it ALL--"just like the men"
But the men never did do it all.
Division of labor in a household meant that there were already two full-time jobs. One for the partner who worked outisde the home and got paid for the work (typically the man), and one for the partner who took care of the household/daily operations of running a family--like shopping, cooking, cleaning, laundry, chlldcare.
When you try to pretend that it isn't a full time job, you run out of time to do those things.

Not that living in 1950s is the solution. But we can at least have an honest conversation about how it is not just the "working moms" responsibility to do this, right? In order for a NON-1950s arrangement to work at all, the question needs to be "working PARENTS...how do you make dinner happen during the week?"

+100000

This. And honestly most families I know have either a PT spouse or WAH spouse or “early shift” spouse. I can’t think of anyone where both parents don’t get home until 6:30. That’s really late.

Completely agree. DH and I both work full time and split the cooking duties along with laundry, etc. He also takes care of the evening bath/bedtime routine while I handle kids in the morning.

I am a SAHM but rushed a lot with school sports in the evening so I’ll chime in anyway. What’s helped me are devices. Set a timer on an electric rice cooker. In the am or the night before, mix an orange marmalade and soy sauce glaze that you can spread on salmon fillets that take just fifteen minutes to roast once you walk in the door in the evening. You can add veggies in with the salmon, same pan. Shrimp is easy to sauté with peppers and onions to eat with the rice or in tortillas. Pioneer Woman has a sixteen minute shrimp scampi recipe I love. I also love the my electric egg cooker. You can poach four eggs in minutes after you get home, add frozen pancakes, berry salad and baked bacon and you have breakfast for dinner. And honestly, lots of prepared grocery meals, salads and delivery in the early years!

Much simpler dinners:

Rotissery chicken one night is spinach/chicken quesadilla (for adults - chicken quesadilla for kids) the next.

Have in the house/freezer at all times:
Tysons 100% all natural white meat chicken nuggets
Aldi's applied chicken sausage
Large bag (Costco) frozen meatballs

On any given night, meatball subs, pasta with jarred sauce and meatballs, apple chicken sausage with pasta or couscous, chicken nuggets with anything...

At least once a week something from the crockpot. Pulled pork, chicken tiki masala (I got that recipe from someone here), and use it more than once. Pulled pork might be on a bun for dinner and over salad the next night.

Another easy favorite (our dump meal) - couscous, during the 5 minutes its cooking, heat up sausage/kielbasa, slice and add to cous cous with a can of diced tomatoes, fresh spinach (frozen works too), add cheese and your done.

Cold rainy nights: Progressive canned tomato soup and grilled cheese

Anytime you're doing what I call real cooking, cook double or triple, and freeze batches. Always real cooking on the weekend!

We always make the bulk of dinner the night before - chop the veggies for salad and make salad dressing, chop/prep the veggies for the side dish, marinate the chicken, etc. If it’s something that can be cooked in 20 min or less, like salmon, we save the actual cooking part until we get home, but if it’s something that takes longer, like lasagna, we cook it the night before and then reheat at dinner time tee next day. It does limit some of the variety, but we would much rather have lots of raw veggies and a reheated main course and a more relaxing evening with our kids than rushing to pull dinner together as soon as we get home. Our kids are 1 and 3 so I’m sure as they get older and can stay up later this will get easier. Until then, lots of salads, easy veggie sides, and things like stews or simple pastas for dinner!

How old is older kid? We reduce our expectations on the fanciness of dinner, and we always eat with the older kid. We also have never had different bedtimes. I don't know if that's baby-specific or something a baby can just adjust to since it was always the way we did it.