Anonymous wrote:After all the taxes and investments and savings, DH gives me 12K a month to run the house every month. He has given me the same amount for past 20 years. It includes everything - mortgage, insurance, food, clothes, household goods, cars, education, childcare, entertainment, vacation, travel, home repair and remodeling, outsourcing stuff, incidentals. When I was working, I was still getting the same amount.

He gives you money to run the house? Do you mean you both mutually agreed that this is the amount the budget requires? No grown woman is "given" money by her spouse.

Anonymous wrote:How much do you budget for expenses a month?

Does your wife have monthly allowance or a debit card /credit cards with her name that she can use as much as she wants ?

What is a fair amount to spend if you have one child together but only one income ?

*we are middle class -300k a year plus random bonuses

Wait, "does the wife have an allowance"??????? What, is she a child bride?
Listen, I stayed home when my kids were little. It was a family decision. We lived in another major city on 40K a year--my husband's salary. (yes, for real) My entire salary would have been eaten up by childcare for two kids, so it didn't make financial sense for me to work instead. We, my spouse and I being both grown ups, decided our budget. There was no "allowance" for me. I spent only what we could afford. He spent only what we could afford. We were extremely frugal. But even if he'd made 100K or 200K, we'd do the same damn thing. If a couple decides together to have one stay at home spouse, a family budget is what is needed. This talk about an allowance is thinking 100 years old. If there is conflict re: the one spouse staying home while kids are little, that's an entirely different problem that needs to be solved differently. And if kids are in school full time, the family should have two incomes. If a wife stays home while kids are in school? She's not a wife, she's his child. Full stop.

I didn’t leave my job until my husband started making over $1M. I don’t have a budget but I’m relatively frugal and I am guessing no one would believe he makes that much as we live well below our means. The big $ is pretty recent so we save a ton.

I make about 75-100k more than your husband. I could really care less what my wife spends money. I trust her.
It really is it not important to me.

We jointly decide amounts for things like big trips, large furniture and home improvement, cars, etc.

But no, there is no budget for food, clothes, hair, etc. But I’m reasonable, if I weren’t I do think he’d notice and say something. He wants to retire early which I fully support. So it’s a different level of savings than many people.

After all the taxes and investments and savings, DH gives me 12K a month to run the house every month. He has given me the same amount for past 20 years. It includes everything - mortgage, insurance, food, clothes, household goods, cars, education, childcare, entertainment, vacation, travel, home repair and remodeling, outsourcing stuff, incidentals. When I was working, I was still getting the same amount.

I stay at home but manage all of our finances - I tell *him* how much he can spend Really though, we have a HHI of about 350K- but the time we pay bills, groceries, necessities, plus contribute to education account/retirement/investment, etc. we keep things modest. There's not a lot money left over to negotiate.

Your question literally makes no sense. You work out a budget together, depending on your HHI. It doesn't really matter that one parent stays at home.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How much do you budget for expenses a month?

Does your wife have monthly allowance or a debit card /credit cards with her name that she can use as much as she wants ?

What is a fair amount to spend if you have one child together but only one income ?

*we are middle class -300k a year plus random bonuses

1) Just our normal stuff.

2) SAHM - spend what ever I want without question. No allowance. We each have a credit card as a primary for the credit rating but both use both.

3) You have plenty of income and are NOT middle class. How is this even an issue?

Not the OP, but if we were in one income of only 300k, I sure as hell would still have to budget.

We have made half that, now slightly more and never had a budget. If you have 300K, you can live very comfortable. We easily do. Its all about choices and how much things like your mortgage and cars cost. We can easily pay cash for things like our cars. We don't live lavishly but I buy what I want, within reason and its fine.

We have a $200k HHI and have a kind of reverse budget. We put everything in Quicken and periodically look at it to see if we are over spending somewhere unusual. We are both non spenders so it works for us.

Anonymous wrote:He seems to think 3k is enough a month for spending —the total he wants me to spend. I don’t agree.

What is included in that spending? Utilities, mortgage, groceries, non-perishables like toilet paper and soap? Children’s activities? Clothing for the family? Yard work or every other week housecleaner?

Anonymous wrote:I’m a SAHM and spend what I want. DH doesn’t care as long as I maintain my looks. He wouid never be okay with me spending money on trips with my girlfriends or family. It must benefit him.

That’s sick.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m a SAHM and spend what I want. DH doesn’t care as long as I maintain my looks. He wouid never be okay with me spending money on trips with my girlfriends or family. It must benefit him.

Cool. Get ready to be replaced in a few years.

Seriously. This guy sounds like an *sshole.

Anonymous wrote:similar stats as yours. I have a personal budget of $500 that I can spend on whatever I want. That doesn't include groceries, eating out, bills, etc.

$500 every month to clarify

similar stats as yours. I have a personal budget of $500 that I can spend on whatever I want. That doesn't include groceries, eating out, bills, etc.

You should both get the same amount of spending money that you can blow how you want.