Anonymous
Post 04/08/2019 23:09     Subject: Stupid me for thinking when he said he'd call he'd actually csll
Anonymous wrote:Op here,
I don't think he's an asshole. Which may just me being dumb.

We met at work. I no longer work there. We went out twice. We were talking every day. I thought things were going well. But he's blown me off for the last week and I really don't know why..

I don't have very much experience with guys. I m not the kind of woman guys go crazy over. Since I was 16 I've only had 3 guys total be interested in me. This guy was the only one to ask me out.
I don't know maybe I got too excited and texted him too much .
I guess it doesn't matter now.


Wasn’t he an hour late on your first date? You deserve better, OP.
Anonymous
Post 04/08/2019 23:08     Subject: Stupid me for thinking when he said he'd call he'd actually csll
Anonymous wrote:This has been proven to be a troll. She also did the Pregnant woman with step daughter who can’t come to the birth.


What? Is there a link in website feedback? I don’t think this one is fake.
Anonymous
Post 04/08/2019 23:02     Subject: Stupid me for thinking when he said he'd call he'd actually csll
Anonymous wrote:This has been proven to be a troll. She also did the Pregnant woman with step daughter who can’t come to the birth.


https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/797265.page
Anonymous
Post 04/08/2019 22:55     Subject: Stupid me for thinking when he said he'd call he'd actually csll
This has been proven to be a troll. She also did the Pregnant woman with step daughter who can’t come to the birth.
Anonymous
Post 04/08/2019 22:31     Subject: Stupid me for thinking when he said he'd call he'd actually csll
Bites OP. I'm sorry. So glad I have been married for 32 years. New relationships are not easy!
Anonymous
Post 04/08/2019 21:51     Subject: Stupid me for thinking when he said he'd call he'd actually csll
Anonymous wrote:Op here,
I don't think he's an asshole. Which may just me being dumb.

We met at work. I no longer work there. We went out twice. We were talking every day. I thought things were going well. But he's blown me off for the last week and I really don't know why..

I don't have very much experience with guys. I m not the kind of woman guys go crazy over. Since I was 16 I've only had 3 guys total be interested in me. This guy was the only one to ask me out.
I don't know maybe I got too excited and texted him too much .
I guess it doesn't matter now.


I was 100% sure this was you again. You need to stop being so fatalistic. I was just like you, very little experience with guys and thought I was completely unlikable.

You know how you gain experience? Through stuff like this. Anything, even if it doesn't work out, is progress for you.
Anonymous
Post 04/08/2019 21:40     Subject: Stupid me for thinking when he said he'd call he'd actually csll
Anonymous wrote:How old are you now OP?


I'm in my 30s. Go ahead make fun of me..
Anonymous
Post 04/08/2019 21:07     Subject: Stupid me for thinking when he said he'd call he'd actually csll
How old are you now OP?
Anonymous
Post 04/08/2019 21:03     Subject: Stupid me for thinking when he said he'd call he'd actually csll
Op here,
I don't think he's an asshole. Which may just me being dumb.

We met at work. I no longer work there. We went out twice. We were talking every day. I thought things were going well. But he's blown me off for the last week and I really don't know why..

I don't have very much experience with guys. I m not the kind of woman guys go crazy over. Since I was 16 I've only had 3 guys total be interested in me. This guy was the only one to ask me out.
I don't know maybe I got too excited and texted him too much .
I guess it doesn't matter now.
Anonymous
Post 04/08/2019 20:13     Subject: Stupid me for thinking when he said he'd call he'd actually csll
Anonymous wrote:I'm a woman and I'm still unclear about what the guy did wrong, let alone why he's been labeled an "a8&hole." The purpose of dating is to get to know someone else, and if one adult decides that s/he wants to not continue one, there's nothing wrong with that. Now if they had plans and he didn't call to finalize them, that's a jerky move - he should at least have told her that he couldn't make it. But not wanting to continue on . . . sure, it can be disappointing, but not a character flaw.


And your another woman who expects bare minimum from men and wants other women to accept the same. If he had told her he wanted to move on that would be fine. Instead he presented the idea he was still interested in op by saying " I'll call you" that is asshole behavior. If you can't see that I can't help you . You are a lost cause.
Anonymous
Post 04/08/2019 19:59     Subject: Stupid me for thinking when he said he'd call he'd actually csll
I'm a woman and I'm still unclear about what the guy did wrong, let alone why he's been labeled an "a8&hole." The purpose of dating is to get to know someone else, and if one adult decides that s/he wants to not continue one, there's nothing wrong with that. Now if they had plans and he didn't call to finalize them, that's a jerky move - he should at least have told her that he couldn't make it. But not wanting to continue on . . . sure, it can be disappointing, but not a character flaw.
Anonymous
Post 04/08/2019 15:02     Subject: Stupid me for thinking when he said he'd call he'd actually csll
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:We've all been there.

From a stable/loving/respectful married side, can I just tell you...get some heat off of the assholes and enjoy. Don't marry them, don't have kids with them, but get some and have some fun nights out on the town and live it up.

This is weirdly good stuff; don't miss it.


YES to this. They're all the wrong one until the right one. Enjoy what there is to enjoy - and marry someone who does what he says he's going to do.


Doesn't sound OP is into hooking up and jumping on the next D.


Then don't enjoy what there is to enjoy - and still marry someone who does what he says he's going to do. It's always disappointing when someone doesn't like you as much as you like them. But just in terms of decision making, you got important information - use that information to make good decisions going forward. He's not the partner for you.


I agree she learned important information . That she should take with her moving forward.
Anonymous
Post 04/08/2019 14:59     Subject: Stupid me for thinking when he said he'd call he'd actually csll
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Don’t take it personal. You weren’t in a serious relationship yet and he lost interest. There doesn’t need to be a conversation about why he has lost interest and why he doesn’t want to talk to you. Maybe he doesn’t even have a concrete reason to tell you. It doesn’t make him a jerk, asshole, or something else derogatory. Be yourself, love yourself. Repeat this: over, next.


Actually leading someone on is the very definition of being an asshole. And women like you willing to excuse poor behavior are the reason so many men think ghosting is okay.

The last part of your post I agree with.


They weren’t in a relationship. At least, it doesn’t sound like they went on more than a couple dates. They were talking frequently and getting to know each other. At some point you either make a relationship out of it or you don’t. You shouldn’t want or need an explanation for why he lost interest. A week of not hearing from him is enough. Would she feel better if he had sent a text and said, “Im sorry but I won’t be talking to you again because...(insert a truthful reason about what they don’t like about you or why they find someone else superior to you). I don’t think it would matter or feel better. If they had been dating exclusively for months and talking about moving in together, getting engaged, etc. that is different. But a couple dates and some phone calls does not require or need explanation if someone isn’t feeling it anymore.


Maybe she would. Maybe she wouldn't But it really isn't that hard to say" I think we make better friends." " Or this isn't working out. Not Just " I'll call you." When you have no intention of doing so. If you are someone who does that this makes you a liar and an asshole. If you are just a woman who excuse everything guys does thinking it makes you strong you are not strong you are just a pick me. This behavior is rude and wrong . Stop trying to make rudeness and bad manners something women should just accept as part of dating.

Respect and good manners is owed to everyone relationship or not or only a few dates.


Woman here and this has nothing to do with respect and good manners. This is a problem with OP and her insecurities Just because he called her yesterday and the day before by no means obligates him to call her every day and provide and explanation if he doesn’t. He didn’t DO anything to her I am excusing. Not calling is not “doing something” somehow mean or offensive to her. He doesn’t want to “just be friends”, why should he have to say that? He doesn’t want to talk to her anymore and he isn’t. Done. They were not in a relationship. OP doesn’t even say they went on date. For all we know she may never have even met him in person- or more than once. She needs to move on and if she has been dwelling on this for more than a day, she needs a therapist. Really, this is something I’d be mulling over in high school, not as an adult woman.


It's not insecure to expect to be treated with respect and to be disappointed when someone doesn't follow through. Doing what you say you are going to do is the bare minimum of human decency. Expecting to be treated with respect is having high self esteem. I don't know if I should shame you or feel sorry for women like you who have been brainwashed into thinking like you do is empowering and a symbol of high self esteem it isn't.

BTW if you were really as mature and evolved as you think you wouldn't call or imply another woman who s childish for daring to be honest about how she feels instead of accepting the misogynistic status quo and claiming to be empowered.
Anonymous
Post 04/08/2019 14:03     Subject: Stupid me for thinking when he said he'd call he'd actually csll
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:We've all been there.

From a stable/loving/respectful married side, can I just tell you...get some heat off of the assholes and enjoy. Don't marry them, don't have kids with them, but get some and have some fun nights out on the town and live it up.

This is weirdly good stuff; don't miss it.


YES to this. They're all the wrong one until the right one. Enjoy what there is to enjoy - and marry someone who does what he says he's going to do.


Doesn't sound OP is into hooking up and jumping on the next D.


Then don't enjoy what there is to enjoy - and still marry someone who does what he says he's going to do. It's always disappointing when someone doesn't like you as much as you like them. But just in terms of decision making, you got important information - use that information to make good decisions going forward. He's not the partner for you.
Anonymous
Post 04/08/2019 14:02     Subject: Stupid me for thinking when he said he'd call he'd actually csll
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Don’t take it personal. You weren’t in a serious relationship yet and he lost interest. There doesn’t need to be a conversation about why he has lost interest and why he doesn’t want to talk to you. Maybe he doesn’t even have a concrete reason to tell you. It doesn’t make him a jerk, asshole, or something else derogatory. Be yourself, love yourself. Repeat this: over, next.


Actually leading someone on is the very definition of being an asshole. And women like you willing to excuse poor behavior are the reason so many men think ghosting is okay.

The last part of your post I agree with.


They weren’t in a relationship. At least, it doesn’t sound like they went on more than a couple dates. They were talking frequently and getting to know each other. At some point you either make a relationship out of it or you don’t. You shouldn’t want or need an explanation for why he lost interest. A week of not hearing from him is enough. Would she feel better if he had sent a text and said, “Im sorry but I won’t be talking to you again because...(insert a truthful reason about what they don’t like about you or why they find someone else superior to you). I don’t think it would matter or feel better. If they had been dating exclusively for months and talking about moving in together, getting engaged, etc. that is different. But a couple dates and some phone calls does not require or need explanation if someone isn’t feeling it anymore.


Maybe she would. Maybe she wouldn't But it really isn't that hard to say" I think we make better friends." " Or this isn't working out. Not Just " I'll call you." When you have no intention of doing so. If you are someone who does that this makes you a liar and an asshole. If you are just a woman who excuse everything guys does thinking it makes you strong you are not strong you are just a pick me. This behavior is rude and wrong . Stop trying to make rudeness and bad manners something women should just accept as part of dating.

Respect and good manners is owed to everyone relationship or not or only a few dates.


Woman here and this has nothing to do with respect and good manners. This is a problem with OP and her insecurities Just because he called her yesterday and the day before by no means obligates him to call her every day and provide and explanation if he doesn’t. He didn’t DO anything to her I am excusing. Not calling is not “doing something” somehow mean or offensive to her. He doesn’t want to “just be friends”, why should he have to say that? He doesn’t want to talk to her anymore and he isn’t. Done. They were not in a relationship. OP doesn’t even say they went on date. For all we know she may never have even met him in person- or more than once. She needs to move on and if she has been dwelling on this for more than a day, she needs a therapist. Really, this is something I’d be mulling over in high school, not as an adult woman.