Anonymous
Post 04/09/2019 14:01     Subject: Re:Do you and friends talk about your salaries? How does it come up?
I work in IT project management with tons of experience and experience in cybersecurity.

On about 5 occasions my job came up in a social situation, a man (it's always been a man) shows surprise, says his work is looking for somebody with my experience and offers me a job.

I ask how much are they paying, they say ~$130K and then I say that would be a paycut, so probably not.
Anonymous
Post 04/09/2019 13:57     Subject: Do you and friends talk about your salaries? How does it come up?
Anonymous wrote:I definitely do I don’t understand why friends would keep that info from each other. I’m pretty upfront with it and so are my friends


Three pages into half the people explaining why they keep their info private and you still don't get why other people make different choices than you? Impressive.
Anonymous
Post 04/08/2019 21:01     Subject: Do you and friends talk about your salaries? How does it come up?
A lot of us are in the medical field and a lot are in the tech field. Sometimes it comes up with Job changes, advice, looking at new jobs, etc.

Of for DH and a couple friends who own their own companies in the tech field, it comes up in discussion regarding new clients or jobs they are doing.
Anonymous
Post 04/08/2019 20:58     Subject: Re:Do you and friends talk about your salaries? How does it come up?
It’s a mix. Some close friends we sort of talk negotiations to support each other but not exact numbers. There are industry specific friends I have been talking exact numbers with lately to help us all succeed in negotiations at our own firms. I really think smart women should be talking $$$$ and getting comfortable advocating for themselves.
Anonymous
Post 04/08/2019 20:51     Subject: Do you and friends talk about your salaries? How does it come up?
I definitely do I don’t understand why friends would keep that info from each other. I’m pretty upfront with it and so are my friends
Anonymous
Post 04/08/2019 20:47     Subject: Do you and friends talk about your salaries? How does it come up?
I have a core group of close friends in DC and do not know what any of them make. We just don't discuss specifics of salary, though we talk about our jobs a lot. Other friends from college/grad school: no idea.
Anonymous
Post 04/08/2019 20:45     Subject: Re:Do you and friends talk about your salaries? How does it come up?
I know the salaries of a lot of friends. I am a shrewd negotiator and many of my friends will come to me for advice once they get an offer. I often do the negotiating on their behalf and write all the emails to get their desired salary and benefits.
Anonymous
Post 04/08/2019 20:17     Subject: Do you and friends talk about your salaries? How does it come up?
Anonymous wrote:Mine is high and my friends have no idea. I don't let on because some of the women in my group are really struggling. I kind of wish I could let one of mine know because she is always trying to get me to come work at her company at significantly below my current salary. She has told me about three openings in her company and I always just say I am not interested. I kind of wish I could say that is half of what I am currently making, but I don't want her to feel bad.


You can. Say that you could not afford to take a pay cut.
Anonymous
Post 04/08/2019 20:14     Subject: Do you and friends talk about your salaries? How does it come up?
Guy here - 100% definitely do not discuss with anyone. Some very loose directional discussions with my brother when I have changed jobs on occassion. I am in a field where I think my friends assume I do well but comp is opaque and there are no public benchmarks like there are with big law partners or other similar.
Anonymous
Post 04/08/2019 19:43     Subject: Do you and friends talk about your salaries? How does it come up?
Never
Anonymous
Post 04/08/2019 19:36     Subject: Do you and friends talk about your salaries? How does it come up?
I think for a lot of people it comes up organically. I know what some of my best friends make because they have told me in the process of job negotiations. My DH is an attorney, an I think he and his attorney friends are really open about salaries: firms pay this and in-house pays that and when they reach out to a friend to ask about negotiating, the other will just flat out say "You need to ask for 220." Over the years you just learn who makes what, generally.
Anonymous
Post 04/08/2019 19:29     Subject: Do you and friends talk about your salaries? How does it come up?
Guy here. Core group of six of us go back to college and know what the others make. Driven mostly by discussing job offers and bouncing ideas off of each other. All in different roles, base pay of the group ranges from $170k to $300k.
Anonymous
Post 04/08/2019 14:31     Subject: Do you and friends talk about your salaries? How does it come up?
I don't usually talk numbers, but I do have a friend looking to make a change and hooked her up with a recruiter so she could get a better understanding of what she should be asking for. We're in different industries so I wouldn't have been able to help her pin it down. With a friend in the same industry, I told her exactly what I was making when she was thinking about leaving her company.
Anonymous
Post 04/08/2019 09:03     Subject: Do you and friends talk about your salaries? How does it come up?
Well, my friends and I do discuss compensations, but I tend to lowball the numbers and omit bonuses. I don't have an envy problem, but others might, so I'd rather be known as the guy who makes more or less the same as everyone in the circle.
Anonymous
Post 04/07/2019 19:46     Subject: Re:Do you and friends talk about your salaries? How does it come up?
No. I don’t discuss my age, weight, or salary with any precision.