Anonymous
Post 04/01/2019 15:36     Subject: Re:Discussion order: sex or Santa

Anonymous wrote:Just saying "sex" can mean lots of things. For example, we've had the soft questions from about age 3 to 7: where do babies come from? A: 'It's when a mommy and a daddy love each other." etc. We say penis, vagina, etc in our house to talk about body parts, so we don't use euphemisms. But for those saying "we talked about sex at age 4 or 5", my question is: were those just the softball Q&As, or when did your talk evolve to use the words: sex, penis, vagina, sperm, egg, womb, etc.? That's the *real* talk I think the OP is looking for.


I have commented in a few places that I told my daughter around 3.5, with the partial help of It's So Amazing (but I had told her many details before then). Yeah, I am really straightforward and told her pretty much everything about procreative sex, I guess-- I didn't get into oral/etc. or heavy details about pleasure or rape/etc... per se, but yes, penis, vagina, sperm, egg, womb (never said stomach or tummy, really-- always uterus). As I've mentioned before, my mom was a doctor (who grew up poor and was told NOTHING-- thought she was dying when she got her period). She told me in the same way at about 4 or so, so it's just what I know. My kid is very matter-of-fact about all of it. It IS an ongoing conversation, though, because we read ISA at 3.5 and 4 and 4.5, but recently at just-turned 6, it was clear she had forgotten about intercourse (she asked) and we had to tell her again. She definitely did the "ew, gross" giggle but it was no big deal.
Anonymous
Post 04/01/2019 15:05     Subject: Discussion order: sex or Santa

Human body, Santa, sexual relationships.
Anonymous
Post 04/01/2019 15:04     Subject: Re:Discussion order: sex or Santa

Anonymous wrote:Just saying "sex" can mean lots of things. For example, we've had the soft questions from about age 3 to 7: where do babies come from? A: 'It's when a mommy and a daddy love each other." etc. We say penis, vagina, etc in our house to talk about body parts, so we don't use euphemisms. But for those saying "we talked about sex at age 4 or 5", my question is: were those just the softball Q&As, or when did your talk evolve to use the words: sex, penis, vagina, sperm, egg, womb, etc.? That's the *real* talk I think the OP is looking for.


I posted earlier that my 4 year old asked when I was pregnant various questions. I used all the correct terms. But as I said we didn’t get to the sex part as she stopped asking and seemed satisfied by knowing how the baby could get out, how it was made (sperm meets egg, etc), and where the sperm comes from. My understanding was always to answer questions as they came, matter of factly, with no more than the info they need to answer that specific question. If my kid doesn’t ask any further questions, and she hasn’t in a while, I’m going to provide some books this summer as she’s 8 now and it’s time for more info as we approach puberty. We’ve already had discussions about bras, feminine products, hormones and deodorant as you get older, but I don’t think she’s quite put the whole picture together yet.

Anonymous
Post 04/01/2019 10:54     Subject: Re:Discussion order: sex or Santa

Anonymous wrote:Just saying "sex" can mean lots of things. For example, we've had the soft questions from about age 3 to 7: where do babies come from? A: 'It's when a mommy and a daddy love each other." etc. We say penis, vagina, etc in our house to talk about body parts, so we don't use euphemisms. But for those saying "we talked about sex at age 4 or 5", my question is: were those just the softball Q&As, or when did your talk evolve to use the words: sex, penis, vagina, sperm, egg, womb, etc.? That's the *real* talk I think the OP is looking for.


considering some of the topics and comments on this website, this line alone is a huge euphemism...
Anonymous
Post 04/01/2019 10:52     Subject: Discussion order: sex or Santa

I tell my identical twins they in fact hatched from one single zygote that divided, and literally nobody knows what causes that.

Also, at 41, santa still drops stuff off for me, I'm not going to be the one to spoil it!
Anonymous
Post 04/01/2019 10:45     Subject: Re:Discussion order: sex or Santa

Just saying "sex" can mean lots of things. For example, we've had the soft questions from about age 3 to 7: where do babies come from? A: 'It's when a mommy and a daddy love each other." etc. We say penis, vagina, etc in our house to talk about body parts, so we don't use euphemisms. But for those saying "we talked about sex at age 4 or 5", my question is: were those just the softball Q&As, or when did your talk evolve to use the words: sex, penis, vagina, sperm, egg, womb, etc.? That's the *real* talk I think the OP is looking for.
Anonymous
Post 04/01/2019 08:56     Subject: Discussion order: sex or Santa

Santa is "real" until the kid finally fesses up that they've known for years. Babies around 5/6 for initial discussion, then 9/10 for more detailed sex talk.
Anonymous
Post 04/01/2019 08:00     Subject: Discussion order: sex or Santa

Anonymous wrote:Never really discussed Santa. Doesn't exist in our house.


Helpful!
Anonymous
Post 04/01/2019 05:22     Subject: Re:Discussion order: sex or Santa

Sex. Confusion about Santa isn’t life-altering.
Anonymous
Post 04/01/2019 02:22     Subject: Discussion order: sex or Santa

Sex first. Not sure how it didn’t come up naturally first. We answered questions honestly as they were asked.
Anonymous
Post 03/31/2019 22:21     Subject: Discussion order: sex or Santa

Sex came first for all of mine. Santa was much, much later (8-10).
Anonymous
Post 03/31/2019 21:17     Subject: Discussion order: sex or Santa

Sex. I had a baby when my first was 5, she started asking questions at 4, as soon as she knew I was pregnant. How will it get out? How did it get made? Where does the sperm come from? She stopped short of asking how the sperm got into me, but I would have answered if she had.
Anonymous
Post 03/31/2019 10:48     Subject: Re:Discussion order: sex or Santa

DD is almost 7 and and has never questioned Santa. I feel like I have one more year before she does. When she does I will be truthful.
She knows where babies grow, how they come out, what the belly button is for etc but doesnt know about the penis/sperm being needed. She is adopted so we have avoided that part for now. We have the " Its not the stork book too" and read any page she asks, she just hasnt asked for that page yet.
Anonymous
Post 03/31/2019 10:37     Subject: Re:Discussion order: sex or Santa

Sex first, ever since toddlerhood. We had "Where did I come from?" in the pile of books, and it just got read and looked at in rotation with all of the other animals and nature books. Older DCs want to know about how the "baby inside mom" got there and how it would get out. Sex shouldn't be a great mystery to kids.

Santa was never a huge deal in our house. Just part of the magic of Christmas. Each kid figured it out on their own around 10-11. Never any big reveal conversation.
Anonymous
Post 03/30/2019 20:22     Subject: Discussion order: sex or Santa

Santa is a fictional character in our house, so we have fun with it but will never have to have a talk.