Anonymous
Post 03/21/2019 12:16     Subject: Amy Schumer reveals husband is on spectrum

Both my husband and son have diagnosed ADHD and strongly suspected Asperger's (or HFA).

It's not fun every day. They are mentally rigid, habitually tardy, don't notice emotional upsets unless they are highly visible, have difficulty with social awareness and self-awareness, both physical and emotional.

On the plus side, they have high IQs, think deeply about everything, never give an off-the-cuff answer, are "problem-solvers" and data-driven, and do not discriminate based on appearances and assumptions.

For all these reasons, my husband is an excellent research scientist, and hopefully my son will go into research/data professions as well. They would be very ill-suited for other jobs, to be frank.

Anonymous
Post 03/21/2019 12:11     Subject: Amy Schumer reveals husband is on spectrum
I love her openness. My ds is 8 and was diagnosed at 3 with severe autism and is now high functioning (or whatever you want to call it). Right before I read her interview, I was having a hard day, struggling with how best to help my son with some social things.... her article really gave me hope and brightened my day.. I know my son will be successful and happy but it is great to hear the stories that reinforce my hopes for him.
Anonymous
Post 03/21/2019 10:03     Subject: Re:Amy Schumer reveals husband is on spectrum
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Yeah, he's just a guy like a lot of guys. Are all engineers, male or female on the spectrum. No. Labeling is pretty ridiculous now. What is the purpose of it? Does he need an IEP code?


Um, no not all engineers are on the spectrum. Also not everyone on the spectrum not some magical stem unicorn of brilliance.

No one said engineers are brilliant. ..but yeah about 80% of engineers have that symptom list down pretty tight- male and female. Ecen they joke about it. AND tonight, there is a group of IT types in their 30s or 40s playing D&D in a living room that someone else organized for them.


My fiance is a brilliant engineer. He once told me he thought he was on the spectrum


Ha. PhD engineer checking in...my colleagues and I have all taken the online tests. It really depends on the engineering type - consultants really need to be social and communicate well.
Anonymous
Post 03/21/2019 06:02     Subject: Amy Schumer reveals husband is on spectrum
I wonder how stressful it will be once the baby arrives? I mean, odds are the baby will have autism, too. She must realize that, right?
Anonymous
Post 03/21/2019 00:01     Subject: Re:Amy Schumer reveals husband is on spectrum
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Yeah, he's just a guy like a lot of guys. Are all engineers, male or female on the spectrum. No. Labeling is pretty ridiculous now. What is the purpose of it? Does he need an IEP code?


Um, no not all engineers are on the spectrum. Also not everyone on the spectrum not some magical stem unicorn of brilliance.

No one said engineers are brilliant. ..but yeah about 80% of engineers have that symptom list down pretty tight- male and female. Ecen they joke about it. AND tonight, there is a group of IT types in their 30s or 40s playing D&D in a living room that someone else organized for them.


My fiance is a brilliant engineer. He once told me he thought he was on the spectrum
Anonymous
Post 03/20/2019 22:41     Subject: Re:Amy Schumer reveals husband is on spectrum
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Yeah, he's just a guy like a lot of guys. Are all engineers, male or female on the spectrum. No. Labeling is pretty ridiculous now. What is the purpose of it? Does he need an IEP code?


Um, no not all engineers are on the spectrum. Also not everyone on the spectrum not some magical stem unicorn of brilliance.

No one said engineers are brilliant. ..but yeah about 80% of engineers have that symptom list down pretty tight- male and female. Ecen they joke about it. AND tonight, there is a group of IT types in their 30s or 40s playing D&D in a living room that someone else organized for them.
Anonymous
Post 03/20/2019 01:52     Subject: Amy Schumer reveals husband is on spectrum
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My husband is in the spectrum and it was such a mistake to get married. How mother is so grateful he found someone to marry, and I really like my in-laws


I am friendly acquaintances with a dad who is on the spectrum - he told me upon our first meeting but I would have guessed it on my own. He's a nice man and I can see him having good qualities as a husband and father. But, he's very difficult to be around. He picks up on very little social cues, or at least he doesn't know what to do with them when he does pick them up. He interrupts when others are talking and talks about unsavory things in the wrong environment for too long. His wife seems super nice and I always wonder if she feels social isolation because of it.


NP here. This describes my husband well. He is extremely conflict oriented and will not back down from a point at all.

Yes, serious social isolation for me. The stuff he posts on Facebook especially...so bad. We get zero invites and I am always apologizing.
Anonymous
Post 03/20/2019 01:26     Subject: Amy Schumer reveals husband is on spectrum
My hfa ds is just like her husband & he can't lie either... it's GLORIOUS to have one I don't have to worry if I'm getting the truth with!
Anonymous
Post 03/19/2019 21:23     Subject: Amy Schumer reveals husband is on spectrum
Anonymous wrote:My cousin was diagnosed with Asperger's back when it was a thing. He's fairly smart, but just normal smart... not like brilliant. (He went to a mediumly selective catholic college and did slightly above average there.) He has a decent, reliable job that he is happy with even though there is no real possibility of advancement. (The only promotion is to management, which is not something he's equipped to do.) He also has a lovely wife, who loves that she can say things to him like "remember to get me a nice 5th anniversary gift; I emailed you a list of possibilities" and "i hate it when you x, y, z" and "i am sick of hearing about topic Q, let's talk about anything else" and he doesn't get offended at all. He would never ever cheat on her and considers himself the luckiest man in the world because she was his first ever girlfriend. They seem very happy and she is pregnant.


OP here, very nice to hear and congrats to them!
Anonymous
Post 03/19/2019 20:40     Subject: Re:Amy Schumer reveals husband is on spectrum
This post is a breath of fresh air. 10 yr old DS was just recently diagnosed with ASD and I have really worried about his future relationships/social engagement. It's a relief to hear people will possibly find his quirks endearing. I've also read that Dan Akroyd, Darryl Hannah and Anthony Hopkins are on the spectrum.
Anonymous
Post 03/19/2019 20:10     Subject: Amy Schumer reveals husband is on spectrum
Anonymous wrote:There are many, many, many happily married people that would have been diagnosed with autism if they were children today, but it wasn’t being diagnosed back then.


This is incredibly true!
Anonymous
Post 03/19/2019 17:39     Subject: Re:Amy Schumer reveals husband is on spectrum
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:She falls during a walk and "He kind of froze and became a lighthouse, opening and closing his mouth." This is endearing and makes her love him.

Uh, ok? also: lighthouse? does she know what they actually do?

That lighthouse description makes perfect sense to me. That is exactly my sister. Tall, standing there, gulping air... something is registering... but guaranteed her triaging of questions/concerns/comments will be off the wall and most likely unhelpful but logical and very entertaining when it does come.

Not following. How do your sister’s actions remind you of a lighthouse?


you seem hung up on lighthouses. Pick any other inanimate object 'the light is on but no one is home' reference and use that if you are so confounded.
Anonymous
Post 03/19/2019 13:30     Subject: Amy Schumer reveals husband is on spectrum
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My husband is in the spectrum and it was such a mistake to get married. How mother is so grateful he found someone to marry, and I really like my in-laws


I am friendly acquaintances with a dad who is on the spectrum - he told me upon our first meeting but I would have guessed it on my own. He's a nice man and I can see him having good qualities as a husband and father. But, he's very difficult to be around. He picks up on very little social cues, or at least he doesn't know what to do with them when he does pick them up. He interrupts when others are talking and talks about unsavory things in the wrong environment for too long. His wife seems super nice and I always wonder if she feels social isolation because of it.


It's interesting that you expect him to conform to your social norms but you can't change a little yourself.

It's easy to redirect a conversation with an aspie person because they won't take it personally (even if you mean it personally... but that is on you) and they have no problem being told straight forward..."im uncomfortable with this conversation can we talk about X".

I suspect they don't feel isolated because they have good friends and then acquaintances like you... doesn't everybody.

I find it easy to navigate, you seem bothered by it... were you isolated as a child... are you an ONLY?


Actually, I do navigate it. And, he seeks me out almost exclusively in social situations because most people just turn away from him. I don't think I've ever seen him talk to others for more than a few minutes and I see him in a number of different settings. Good point about being more straightforward about telling him when the convo is becoming too gross or whatever. I should do that.

Nice to slip in the ad hominem attack at the end there. ONLY, in all caps. You might want to think it's just me but it isn't. Really.


I didn't say you were the only one that is rude. If you live in a close in DC neighborhood or DC I suspect you are among many rude people. Being part of the majority is not always a good thing.

I find lawyers are harder to be around... but that is me.
Anonymous
Post 03/19/2019 13:19     Subject: Amy Schumer reveals husband is on spectrum
I only hope she has his consent to discuss his issues. I would sure not be talking about my DH on tv.
Anonymous
Post 03/19/2019 13:15     Subject: Amy Schumer reveals husband is on spectrum
My cousin was diagnosed with Asperger's back when it was a thing. He's fairly smart, but just normal smart... not like brilliant. (He went to a mediumly selective catholic college and did slightly above average there.) He has a decent, reliable job that he is happy with even though there is no real possibility of advancement. (The only promotion is to management, which is not something he's equipped to do.) He also has a lovely wife, who loves that she can say things to him like "remember to get me a nice 5th anniversary gift; I emailed you a list of possibilities" and "i hate it when you x, y, z" and "i am sick of hearing about topic Q, let's talk about anything else" and he doesn't get offended at all. He would never ever cheat on her and considers himself the luckiest man in the world because she was his first ever girlfriend. They seem very happy and she is pregnant.