"Acts of service" annoy me because I don't necessarily know what counts. With the other love languages, I more or less know when I'm doing them. Sometimes it's hard to distinguish acts of service from acts she just expects me to do. I mean, a huge chunk of my life is spent working to pay a mortgage I absolutely would not have except to provide a home she finds suitable. Taking out the trash? Doing the dishes? Fixing stuff around the house? Hard telling.

As for me, I'm probably physical touch followed by words of affirmation followed by (small) gifts.

Dh and I are both acts of service followed by physical touch. This has definitely made our lives easier over the years.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our love language is simple. When my husband turns down playing golf with his buddies so he can play with me that is true love!

That must be because you give him a lot of strokes!

She takes a firm grip on the shaft, not too far from the head.

That will straighten out his putter and help him get it in the hole. Those 6" putts are tough.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our love language is simple. When my husband turns down playing golf with his buddies so he can play with me that is true love!

That must be because you give him a lot of strokes!

She takes a firm grip on the shaft, not too far from the head.

Anonymous wrote:I took quiz and my most dominant one is quality time and least is physical touch while my husband’smost dominant one is physical touch and least quality time. Yikes!

Look at the silver lining. To share quality time, or physical touch, you two have to be next to each other. So you both like that.

I took quiz and my most dominant one is quality time and least is physical touch while my husband’smost dominant one is physical touch and least quality time. Yikes!

Anonymous wrote:Our love language is simple. When my husband turns down playing golf with his buddies so he can play with me that is true love!

That must be because you give him a lot of strokes!

Our love language is simple. When my husband turns down playing golf with his buddies so he can play with me that is true love!

The critical purpose of knowing you and your partner’s Love Language is to be empowered in how you communicate love in a way that is easily understood and received by your partner. A person knowing their love language can articulate to a partner, when you do (Love language act 1-5), I feel loved.

Choosing to show love in a way that is meaningful to the other person, instead of showing love in the way that you know or prefer to do it, is what this is all about.

By the way, children have love languages too and there is a book on how parents can show love to their kids in a way most meaningful to them. Also, there is a book on the 5 Apology Languages. They are all pretty good.

Just want to clarify that Physical Touch is NOT sex. It includes sex - but it’s not sex. It’s literal forms of physical touch - stroking your hair, caressing your arm, holding hands, hugging, rubbing your back when sitting together. Physical Touch literally makes a person FEEL loved from another person. While I actually feel loved when there is frequent sex, I’m not a big touchy feely person. I scored really low on physical touch as a love language preference when presented with qualifying scenarios on the quiz.

Acts of Service for me (Physical Touch a very close second) and Gifts for him (Physical Touch a close second). I'm cheap and he's lazy, so we compromise and make out a lot.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a woman and it's acts of service. E.g. I will cook your favorite meal when I know you had an exhausting day and you will scrape the snow off my car in the morning.
It seems that this love language is rarer than the others

Lol. This is my husband's and it's annoying. I like presents and sweet words, not somebody fixing the garbage disposal. If I need a plumber I will call one. I am a gift giver and he hates it. Thinks I am just creating clutter.

Umm... If you know he hates it, why do you buy him gifts? You want to show him you love him by doing stuff he hates??? Mkay...

No, the point is that once I became aware that buying him stuff did not, in fact, make him feel love, I stopped doing it. He feels love when you spend time with him. I figured out that there were weekends when he would do yard stuff and then come in and explain that he felt exploited and unloved and that what he really wanted was for me (literally) to sit in a lawn chair in the yard reading a book and just being there while he trimmed the bushes or whatever. He just wanted me around. Turns out I can do that!

He will occasionally buy me a cheap bouquet from Lidl or Aldi now because he knows that I care about that stuff. Still the world's worst gift giver of surprise items. However, I recently discovered the Fab Fit Fun box so 4 times a year I get a little surprise with thoughtful items picked out by someone else. Works for us!

Anonymous wrote:

My sex language, on the other hand, is just make me feel desired. When men are with women long enough they seem to stop doing that which in turn can kill their partner's desire. I can't go from cold to hot, especially with a long-term partner, unless you do that for me.

If only there were some way women could communicate this to their husbands, instead of expecting them to be dancing monkeys capable of recognizing by telepathy what ever-changing thing it is that makes their woman "feel desired".

And women love to say they are better at communication and people skills.

Why are you assuming things about others' communication? You don't even know who you're replying to.

KY

Honey, try not to spend all the money that we don't have.